


Keep Holding On

by a1_kitkat



Series: Night of My Life [2]
Category: Westlife
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Anal Sex, Boys Kissing, Established Relationship, First Love, Homophobia, M/M, Making Out, Nicky loves Shane, Rimming, Shane Loves Nicky, Shnicky - Freeform, Slash, Young Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-11
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-03-11 19:43:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 60,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3332429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a1_kitkat/pseuds/a1_kitkat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nicky and Shane are reunited for the first time after Shane's return to Sligo. When Shane's homophobic father discovers his son is gay, their relationship is put to the test.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

Despite phoning Nicky that night, Shane didn’t tell him the good news. He had wanted to but in the end, he decided against it. Shane knew he wanted to tell Nicky in person and not over the phone. He wasn’t sure how he managed to keep it a secret but he did. The brunette spoke to Nicky every night on the phone; they emailed every other day and sent countless text messages back and forth.  
Peter remained oblivious while Mae kept it to herself. She was happy for her son but had no idea how her husband would react. Therefore, she remained quiet. Nearly three weeks passed before Mae broached the subject with Peter. She was careful in her approach, stating simply that they had been home long enough and had settled back into their normal routines. It was time for Shane to invite Nicky up for the weekend. Peter, unaware of his son’s true relationship with Nicky, didn’t disagree.

The following day, while Peter was at work, Mae pulled Shane aside.  
“I talked to your father last night” Mae began.  
“About what?” Shane asked, instantly on his guard.  
“Well, I explained to him that… I think you’re bored. I mean schools over and your father and I spend most days at work… I told him that I thought it would be a good idea for you to invite Nicky to stay with us for a few days”  
“Really?” Shane exclaimed, a smile forming on his lips.  
“Absolutely” she replied.  
He leapt to his feet and threw his arms around her, hugging her tightly.  
“When? When should I ask him to get here?” Shane asked.  
“How about this weekend? If he doesn’t already have plans, he can maybe come up on Thursday or Friday and stay till Sunday night”  
“I’ll ask him tonight”

Mae smiled; happy she could bring her son some happiness.  
“Have you told him about your acceptance at UCD?” she asked.   
“Not yet” Shane replied.  
“Why not? I thought you’d be dying to tell him”  
“I was... I mean, I am... And I was going to but... I decided to wait. I wanted to tell him in person and not over the phone. I want to see his reaction, make sure he’s as happy as I am about it”  
“Why wouldn’t he be?”

Shane shrugged his shoulders and Mae felt a sense of unease.  
“Uh oh” Mae said. “What’s wrong?”  
“Well, it’s been a few weeks now” Shane said. “And I just... I don’t know if he misses me as much as I miss him”  
“Why wouldn’t he?”

The brunette sat back and looked at his mother. He took a deep breath then sighed, Once again, this wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have with his mother but there was no one else he could talk to.  
“Mam...” Shane whispered. “What if he was just playing with me?”  
“Oh, sweetheart-” Mae began.  
“The first time I kissed him, he called me a queer. Two nights later, he climbed in my bedroom window and...” Shane trailed off. He wasn’t sure if his mother knew what had really happened that night.  
“I wasn’t born yesterday, Shane”  
“Mam?”  
She reached out and placed her hand on his shoulder.  
“I know what...” She hesitated. This conversation wasn’t any easier for her than it was for Shane. “I figured it out for myself, what the two of you... Did during the night”  
Shane felt his cheeks beginning to flush and looked away as he spoke.  
“Well, it seemed like a very quick change of heart” he told her. “I was, weary, but willing to take the risk... But what if he wasn’t expecting anything more?”

“I don’t think I understand what you’re saying” Mae said.  
“I keep waiting for the bubble to burst” Shane explained. “I keep expecting him to stop messaging or emailing me... I worry that when I call him, he won’t answer the phone... And I’m scared that he’s going to tell me that... That he regrets it. That he’s not really into lads... or me... That what happened between us was a once off”

“You don’t really think he would do that, do you?”  
“No... But I’m scared that he will”  
“You can’t live in constant fear, honey. Next time you’re talking to him, maybe you should ask him about it?”  
“I can’t, not over the phone”  
“So... Go upstairs and call him now. Ask him to come visit... Tell him, I insist on it... And, if he’s not... Invested in making it work, then he won’t come... And you’ll know for sure”   
“And... You’re sure dad’s okay with this?” Shane asked her.  
“Yes, I’m positive” she smiled. “Now go, I don’t want to see you back down here until you’ve got an answer from Nicky”

Shane smiled nervously at his mother then hugged her. He jumped up from his chair and hurried from the room, taking the stairs two at a time. Once in the safety of his bedroom, he reached for the phone. His hand was shaking as he pressed speed-dial for Nicky’s number.  
The older boy answered on the second ring. Shane could hear the excitement in Nicky’s voice.

“Shay, you’re calling early” Nicky exclaimed, grinning to himself. “I thought it was my turn to call you?”  
“Oh Nix” Shane sighed with content. “I miss you”  
“Yeah, I miss you too”  
“Got any plans for the weekend?”  
Nicky laughed. “You ask me that every day... But this weekend I happen to have off”  
“Really?”  
“Really”  
“That’s perfect! Mam wants you to come visit... In fact, she’s even insisting on it”  
“Oh, she’s insisting? Well, in that case... I guess it would be rude to say no”  
“Absolutely”  
“So... Saturday then?”  
“What? You expect me to wait until Saturday to see you? Can’t you come any sooner? Like tomorrow?”  
“Tomorrow?” Nicky laughed. “You know I work Wednesdays... I might be able to change my shift on Thursday... And come up in the afternoon...”  
“That would be fantastic!”  
“I’ll see what I can do but I can’t make any promises”  
“But you’ll call and let me know as soon as you can?”  
“I will... Wow, it’s finally happening” Nicky said.  
“We’ll be... Together... Again” Shane stammered.   
“We will… I’m kinda nervous though”  
“What? Why?”  
“About meeting your friends and stuff…”  
“Well, you don’t have to… Meet them, I mean. We can just keep to ourselves or…”  
“You don’t want me to meet them?”  
“No, no of course I do… I just…”

“They just don’t know about ‘us’ yet?” Nicky asked him.  
“Of course not” Shane admitted.  
“I haven’t exactly told anyone either”  
“I’m scared to tell them… In case my father finds out…”  
“Your father? He wouldn’t approve?”  
“No” Shane almost laughed at the thought. “How would your dad feel?”  
“No idea… And… Not looking to find out any time soon either”  
“I’m… Relieved that my mam knows. It makes it easier. A little embarrassing, sure, but at least she’s not trying to keep us apart”  
“Living on separate sides of the country does that”

“Please try to come up this weekend” Shane whispered. “I really want to see you”  
“I really want to see you too” Nicky replied. “I promise, I’ll do everything I can to make it to Sligo”  
“Thank you”  
“Shay, I have to go… Gotta run an errand for my mam… I’ll call you back later tonight, okay?”  
Shane nodded his head then remembered Nicky couldn’t actually see him.  
“Okay… Talk to you tonight” Shane said,  
“Bye Shay”  
“Bye Nix”   
“I love you”

The line went dead before Shane could respond. He looked down at the phone and lay down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. A smile danced upon his lips. In a few hours he’d know if Nicky was coming to see him and if he was, then in a few short days, Nicky would be there.  
He didn’t want to get his hopes up but the thought of seeing Nicky again, of being able to tell him of the decision he’d made, was making his heart pound with excitement. He took a moment to imagine Nicky’s reaction and his smile widened.  
Shane didn’t know how he was going to get through the next few days. The weekend seemed so far away but he knew the wait would be worth it.

*

He somehow managed to survive the day. Every time the phone rang, he practically leapt out of his skin. His mother could see how on edge he was but she gave up trying to answer the phone herself & left that task to her son.   
It was almost ten o’clock by the time Nicky called him and Shane had almost given up hope. However, the older boy was calling with good news. He’d managed to arrange for a few days off work and he was looking forward to visiting Shane.  
The brunette was still shaking with anticipation when he crawled into bed that night.

Shane awoke bright and early the following morning. His first thought was of Nicky and his approaching visit. He tossed back the duvet and sat up in bed, looking around his room. Shane hadn’t wanted Nicky to see his room in such disarray but he was yet to unpack all his belongings. The brunette hadn’t seen any point when he’d be repacking in a few weeks time.  
He climbed out of bed and walked over to the topmost box. He opened the lid and picked up the framed photograph of himself and Nicky. Shane smiled at the photo then set it back inside the box.

The brunette wanted to display the photograph in his room but was afraid his father would see it. Shane still wasn’t sure how his father would react and he knew he’d rather not find out.

By the time Shane ventured downstairs for breakfast, both his parents had already left for work. He poured a bowl of cereal and took it into the Study. Shane turned the computer on and started surfing the internet while eating his breakfast. He spent near an hour online, scanning various sites then wiped the browser history. The last thing he wanted was for his parents to know what he’d been ‘researching’.  
Shane turned the computer off then began to slowly pace around the room. He wasn’t sure what to do with himself; boredom finally kicked in and he returned to the Kitchen. Several boxes were yet to be unpacked so he spent the remainder of the morning putting everything back in its rightful place.

Mae returned home for lunch and found her son on the couch, reading a book.  
“How’s your morning been?” she asked him.  
“Slow” Shane sighed.  
Mae smiled. “He’ll be here in just a few days”  
“I know… It just seems like… Like too long to wait”  
“Have you thought about what the two of you are going to do while he’s here?”  
Shane felt his cheeks beginning to flush and he kept his face hidden behind his open book. Truthfully, he’d not thought of much else but he wasn’t about to admit that to his mother.  
“He might like to see Glencar Waterfall” Mae said. “Maybe take him to the Walsh’s stable… Does he like horses?”  
“Uh, I’m not sure” Shane replied, finally able to look at her.  
“Well, it’s something to think about. When’s he getting here again?”  
“Friday” Shane sighed. “He said he’d try to come up tomorrow but probably can’t make it until Friday”

Mae reached out and put her arm around her son. She knew how impatient he was to see Nicky again and wished she could speed up time for him. Shane returned the hug then followed her into the Kitchen. They ate lunch together then Mae left to return to work. Shane returned to his seat on the couch and picked up his book. For the brunette, it proved to be a very long afternoon.

**--**

Shane walked the aisles of the grocery store, unsure what he was really looking for. He checked the list in his hand then threw several items into the trolley. The brunette couldn’t concentrate; his mind was pre-occupied with thoughts of Nicky. He picked up a bag of crisps and placed them atop of the shopping. His mother had asked him to pick up groceries as she had been called in to work and Shane was happy to help out. He had wanted to pick up a few things himself but now that he was in the store, he was having second thoughts.

He stopped and pretended to examine the list, all the while he was eyeing off a box of condoms. All he had to do was grab it and throw it in with the rest of the groceries but he couldn’t build up the courage. There were too many people around who knew him. He flexed his fingers and began to reach for them.

“Shane!”  
The brunette spun around and found himself face to face with his ex-girlfriend.  
“Samantha” Shane greeted her. She threw her arms around him and kissed his cheek.  
“I’ve missed you so much” she gushed. “Why haven’t you been to see me?”  
“I… Uh… I’ve been busy…” Shane replied, returning the embrace. “You know, unpacking and everything”  
“Have you heard from any Colleges yet?”  
Shane hesitated. He’d not told anyone about his acceptance to University College Dublin. Samantha looked at him expectantly but he held back.  
“Yeah, a few” he told her.  
“So… Well, now that you’re back… Do you want to take me out tomorrow night?”  
“I can’t, I actually already have plans”  
“You do?”  
“Yeah” Shane smiled. “Uh, I don’t know if you remember or not but you broke up with me”  
“Oh that” Samantha laughed. “Does it really matter? You’re back now and you’re single, and I’m available…”  
“I never said I was single, Samantha”  
“What?”  
“I met someone… In Dublin…”  
“Oh, like that’s gonna last” She playfully punched his arm.

“It is, trust me” Shane insisted.   
“How can you be so sure?” She asked. “It’s not like you’re in love with her or anything”  
“That’s where you’re wrong. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before… I know it’s the real thing and I’m determined to make it work”  
“You loved me once and we were determined to make it work”  
“Until you gave up on us but Nicky’s not like that”  
“How is she any different to me?”  
Shane sighed. “You know, sometimes I wonder what I ever saw in you”

At that moment, his phone beeped. Shane pulled his mobile from his pocket and saw he’d received a text from Nicky. He smiled and opened the message.  
‘Leaving now, be there in a few hours XXX’  
Shane’s heart began to pound. He didn’t bother to type a reply; he shoved his phone back in his pocket and looked at Samantha.  
“Have a nice day, Samantha” Shane said to her. She glared at him.  
“You’ve been here three weeks, I’m sure she’s forgotten all about you by now”  
“Not everyone’s like you, you know” 

Shane turned his back on her and walked away. He finished the rest of the shopping and hurried home. The brunette put the groceries away then spent an hour going around the house, making sure everything was in order.   
He went upstairs and had a shower then stood in his bedroom, trying to decide what to wear. He didn’t want to look like he was trying too hard but at the same time he wanted to look nice for the older boy.  
The brunette was secretly hopeful that whatever he wore, he wouldn’t have on for long once Nicky arrived. Opting for his favourite jeans and a comfortable shirt, he dressed quickly and made his way back down the stairs.

He checked his watch and sighed impatiently. Nicky wouldn’t be arriving for at least another hour, possibly closer to two. Shane picked up the phone and called his mother at work. 

“Nicky’s on his way” Shane said to her.  
“Now sweetheart, I know you’re nervous” she assured him. “But everything will be okay”  
“What am I supposed to do until then?”  
“Just be patient. And can you call your father? He’s picking up dinner on the way home tonight”  
“Okay… And what time will you be home?”  
“I’m here until seven, so your father will be home before me”  
“What time will that be?” Mae laughed.  
“Just after six, so you’ll just have to keep out of trouble until then, okay?”  
“Okay Mam… I’ll see you tonight”  
“Bye Shane”

The brunette hung up the phone then picked it up once more. This time, he phoned his father and told him to expect one more for dinner. Peter was very busy and didn’t keep his son on the phone very long. By the time Shane finished his phone calls, he’d only managed to waste ten minutes.  
He turned the television on and flicked through the channels but quickly gave up. Shane found the book he’d been reading the previous day and picked it up. He tried to read it but after reading the same paragraph four times, was forced to put it down. He sighed in frustration and went into the Kitchen.

Shane put the kettle on then made himself a cup of tea. He took the warm cup outside and sat on the porch swing. The brunette knew he would appear desperate but he didn’t care. Nicky had all the directions and Shane had confidence that the blonde wouldn’t get lost along the way.  
He sat on the swing, using his foot to move the swing back and forth, and sipped his tea. It was a chilly afternoon but Shane didn’t care. He’d already decided that he wasn’t going inside until Nicky arrived.

After what felt like an age, Shane saw a familiar car pull into the drive. He stood up as the car came to a stop. The brunette could see Nicky waving to him. Shane stepped off the porch and approached the car as Nicky climbed out.  
The blonde looked exactly how Shane remembered him, if not even more beautiful. Nicky had had a haircut, nothing overly different but Shane noticed immediately. They both stopped just shy of each other, unsure of the appropriate greeting.

Shane moved forward and hugged Nicky. They held each other for a moment then separated.  
“You’re finally here” Shane whispered.  
“I am” Nicky agreed. “I’ve missed you”  
“Me too”  
“Uh, come in” Shane said. “Come inside, its cold out here”

Nicky made his way to the trunk of his car and unlocked it. He retrieved his bag then locked the car before following Shane inside the house. He looked around and noted that he couldn’t see any of the neighbour’s houses. From what he’d seen so far, Sligo was rather secluded and a part of him liked that.

Shane opened the front door and went inside. He held the door open for Nicky. Once inside, Shane reached out and took Nicky’s bag from the blonde. They looked into each other’s eyes as Shane’s hand held onto Nicky’s.  
The younger boy held his breath; his heart was beating in his ears and he felt his hand starting to tremble. Lucky for him, Nicky reached up with his other hand and gently cupped Shane’s cheek. He closed the gap between them and brought their lips together in a gentle kiss.

As soon as their lips locked, Shane dropped Nicky’s bag and wrapped his arms around the blonde. The kiss lost its tenderness and became a fierce battle for dominance. It was as though everything they’d been suppressing for the past three weeks had to be expressed in this one embrace.  
Shane knew he wouldn’t be able to navigate the way up stairs so he began to pull the older boy towards the living room. They somehow managed to find the coffee table which tripped them up but resulted in them landing on the couch, which was where Shane was leading them anyway.

Their hands were everywhere, both desperate and eager. Shane pulled Nicky to him as he sank into the cushions. The blonde was more than willing to go along for the ride. He fumbled with the zip of Shane’s jeans then slid his hand inside. The younger boy gasped into the kiss as Nicky’s fingers touched his sensitive flesh.

“No” Shane whispered.  
“What?” Nicky replied, breaking the kiss and looking down at the brunette. “What’s wrong?”  
“We have to stop”  
“Why?”

Nicky reluctantly climbed off Shane and sank down onto the floor beside the couch. The younger boy rolled over and looked at Nicky. He reached out and placed his hand on the blonde’s cheek.  
“We should go upstairs” Shane stated. “If my parents were to come home early, for whatever reason, well… I don’t want them seeing something they shouldn’t”  
Nicky nodded his head in understanding. Shane reached down and took hold of Nicky’s hand. He climbed off the couch and pulled the blonde to his feet. 

They returned to the hall and collected Nicky’s bag before heading up the stairs. Shane led Nicky along the landing and stopped. He pushed the door open and indicated for the blonde to enter. Nicky moved past Shane and stepped into the room.

“Twin beds?” Nicky asked.  
“They used to be mine, before we moved…” Shane admitted. “Then my parents decided I was too old for twin beds and got me a double”  
“Lucky you” Nicky smiled.  
“I kinda liked having them, actually… I used to have friends stay over all the time… Like two or three times a week… Right up until we moved to Dublin…”  
“My friends and I used to just sleep on the floor”  
“Classy”  
Nicky shrugged. “It was fun; we could fit four or five of us on the floor around the bed”

Shane walked over and placed Nicky’s bag on one of the beds. The blonde saw him but didn’t say anything.  
“So… Uh… This will be your room” Shane said. He walked over to what Nicky thought was a closet and opened it, revealing the bathroom. “That door leads to my room… You can leave your stuff in there if you want; my parents have their own bathroom”  
“So… Just the other side of that door is your bed?” Nicky asked him.  
“Yeah” Shane replied, oblivious to Nicky’s hint.

The blonde smiled to himself then walked up behind Shane. He wrapped his arms around the younger boy’s waist and kissed his neck.  
“Show me” Nicky whispered. “I want to see your room”  
“It’s all a mess” Shane replied. “I still haven’t finished unpacking from the move…”  
Nicky giggled then rolled his eyes. Shane could be so daft sometimes!  
With his arms still around Shane’s waist, Nicky once again slid his hand inside Shane’s jeans. The brunette bit his lip and leaned back into Nicky’s embrace.  
“Like I said, I want to see your room” Nicky said into Shane’s ear. “But mostly, your bed… With you on it”  
Shane turned his head and captured Nicky’s lips with his own.  
“Nix-“ Shane hesitated.

Nicky held back a groan and dropped his head onto Shane’s shoulder. The younger boy turned around and faced Nicky.  
“I’m sorry” Shane began.  
“What is it?” Nicky asked him. “What’s wrong?”  
“I… Uh… Are we just going to dive right in or…”

Nicky laughed as Shane trailed off. He lifted his hand and placed his finger to Shane’s lips.  
“Shay, why are you so nervous?” Nicky asked him.  
“Nervous?” Shane replied. “I’m not…”  
“Shay, its okay… But when we were downstairs, we were all over each other and now that we’re up here… Mere steps away from your bed, you’re acting like a shy schoolgirl”  
“I know and I’m sorry”  
“Don’t be sorry, just… Tell me what’s wrong”

Shane took a deep breath then pulled away from Nicky. He took the blonde’s hand in his then led him through the bathroom and into his bedroom. The brunette walked over to the double bed and sat down, urging Nicky down beside him.

“Nicky, I love you” Shane said to him. “And… And that night we spent together was amazing. It meant so much to me”  
“It meant a lot to me too” Nicky said, gently stroking the back of Shane’s hand.  
“And I… I want to do it again… I really do but… I don’t want it to take away from what we had”  
“Shane that night will always been special… Nothing will ever change that”  
“I’m sure I sound like the biggest freak when I say this but… You’re here now and we’ve got the next few days ahead of us…I want to know that there’s more to us than just sex”  
Nicky smiled and placed a kiss to Shane’s forehead.  
“You’re such a girl, Shay” Nicky whispered, grinning.  
“Don’t make fun”  
“I’m not, I swear… But just admit it, Shane… You don’t want us to get all hot and heavy because you don’t have any condoms”

Shane felt his cheeks begin to flush. He was instantly reminded of his run-in with Samantha at the grocery store.  
“I couldn’t buy any” Shane insisted. “Too many people here know me and I’d have to answer too many questions”  
“You were embarrassed” Nicky teased.  
“Yes, okay? I was embarrassed. Especially when I ran into my ex while trying to work up the courage to pick up the box”  
Nicky giggled and kissed Shane once more.  
“You are so cute” Nicky said to him.  
“Don’t patronize me” Shane stated.  
“I’m not… I’m simply stating a fact”

The older boy shifted his position and threw his leg over Shane, straddling the brunette. He leaned forward and kissed him deeply. Shane wrapped his arms around Nicky and held him close.   
“You know…” Nicky began. “I didn’t exactly come unprepared”  
“So… You wanna have sex right now?”  
“You mean… You really don’t?”

Shane didn’t reply so Nicky climbed off his lap. The blonde sat down on the bed beside the younger boy and they both fell silent. Minutes passed while neither of the spoke. Shane turned to look at Nicky and the blonde was staring at him. The younger boy threw himself at Nicky and plunged his tongue into the blonde’s mouth.  
Nicky was prepared and returned Shane’s fierce embrace with equal vigour.

“I was wrong” Shane said to him. “I want to do this…. With you… Right now”  
“So do I” Nicky replied.

The blonde separated himself from Shane then made his way through the bathroom and into the guest room. Nicky opened his bag and began to rummage around the contents. He specifically remembered putting the box in his jacket pocket. He had then put the jacket on his bed with the intention of putting it in his bag after...

“Ah crap” Nicky cursed.

He reluctantly returned to Shane’s room, sadly empty handed. The brunette sat up and looked at him, expectantly.  
“I’m sorry, Shay” Nicky confessed. “I put them in my jacket and then I left that jacket at home”  
Shane nodded and climbed off the bed. He wrapped his arms around Nicky and looked into his eyes.  
“So we’re both daft” Shane said to him.  
“Looks like it” Nicky replied.  
“What do we do now?”  
“We buy some”  
“What?”  
“Its okay, no one here knows me. They won’t think twice about an eighteen year old walking into a shop and buying a box of condoms”  
“I…” Shane hesitated. He didn’t want to have to do that but what other choice did they have? He knew there was no way he could have Nicky under his roof for three whole days and not have sex with him.  
“Come on, what other choice do we have?” Nicky asked.

**--**

Shane stood on the sidewalk outside the grocery store, nervously chewing his fingernail and looking around for people who might recognize him.

“Shay, will you calm down?” Nicky said to him. “We’re not dong anything wrong here yet you’re acting like we’re about to go in and rob the place”  
“How about I go and wait on the corner?” Shane suggested. “There’s a park on the next block, I’ll meet you there?”  
“Fine… I’ll see you in a few, okay?”

Nicky turned and pushed the door open. Once inside, he froze. The blonde had no idea where to find what he was looking for and he didn’t want to ask. He headed towards one aisle and started down it. Not wanting to draw attention to himself, he decided to just walk up and down each aisle until he found what he was looking for.  
After what felt like an age, he finally found the correct aisle and stopped. He eyed each box, unsure how many he needed to buy. Sure he was only in town for a few days but he really hoped to make the most of his time there.

He picked up a box of 12 and started towards the register. Not looking where he was going, he rounded a corner and walked into someone.

“Oh, excuse me” Nicky said to the young woman standing before him.  
“No harm done” she replied. “Oh, you dropped your…”

She knelt down and picked up the box. Her eyes scanned the item before she handed it to Nicky.  
“So… Are you new in town or just visiting?” she asked.  
“Visiting” Nicky replied. He tried to step around her but she moved into his path.  
“Family or friends?”  
“Friends”  
“How long you staying?”  
“A few days”  
“Well, if you’re looking for something or someone to do…”   
“Uh... Thanks but I’m not interested”

Nicky tried to shake her once more but the girl would have none of it. She walked with him to the register.  
“So… Who’s this friend you’re visiting? Maybe I know them” she said.  
“Maybe you do… Maybe you don’t” Nicky replied.  
“Or maybe they know me? I’m Samantha”  
Nicky stopped and looked at her. He knew it was probably a long shot but was it possible that this girl was Shane’s ex? A part of him was curious and wanted to ask her but that would be tipping things in her favour.  
“Nice to meet you, Samantha” Nicky said. “But I’m kinda in a hurry…”  
“Sure thing… Listen, there’s a pub on the next corner… I’ll be there, later tonight… If you feel like joining me”

Nicky smiled but didn’t give a definite yes. He stepped up to the counter and handed over some money. She was almost out of sight and Nicky thought he was in the clear when she quickly hurried back.  
“Hey” she said. “You didn’t tell me your name”  
“No, I didn’t” he replied, relieved to finally be walking away from her.  
“So how am I supposed to find you again?”  
“Guess you’ll just have to be patient and… Have hope”

The blonde pushed the door open and hurried outside. A part of him was hopeful that she wasn’t Shane’s ex. If she was, he really didn’t know how Shane had managed to survive in a relationship with her. He was happy to finally be free of her, she struck him as one who wouldn’t normally take no for an answer.  
Nicky hurried down the street and spotted the park Shane had mentioned. He crossed the road and saw the brunette sitting on one of the benches. Nicky walked over and sank down on the seat beside him.  
He wasn’t sure if he should mention the girl or not and decided against it. The last thing he wanted was for Shane to be thinking of his ex right before having sex with Nicky.

“Can we get going now?” Nicky asked him. “It’s freezing out here”  
“Sure, I’ll take you back to mine and get you all warmed up” Shane replied.

*

Samantha was still standing by the register when her best friend, Rachel, came running up to her.

“Who was that?” Rachel gushed. “And where can I get one?”  
“Back off, I saw him first” Samantha insisted.  
“So what? Who was he?”  
“He’s just visiting…”  
“Uh oh”  
“What?”  
“I know that look”  
“What look?”  
“You’ve got your ‘I want him and I’m going to have him’ look on your face”  
“Don’t worry; I won’t have any trouble finding him again”  
“How can you be so sure?”  
“It’s a small town… And he was buying condoms”  
“You think he’ll be at O’Malley’s tomorrow night?”  
“Of course, unless whoever he’s visiting lives under a rock… Everyone goes to O’Malley’s”  
“And he didn’t say who he was visiting?”  
“He didn’t even tell me his own name, much less who he’s staying with… He’s obviously just shy”  
“Or you intimidate him”  
“Me? Come on, he was like putty in my hands”  
“Then why didn’t he tell you his name?”  
“Some lads like to have an air of mystery… Either way, I’ll find him and I’ll have him”  
“Yeah” Rachel sighed. “I know you will”

**--**

Peter unlocked the front door and made his way inside the house. He made his way into the Kitchen and placed the bags of take away on the counter. The house was very quiet and he immediately wondered where his son was. Something in the yard caught his eye and he moved towards the Kitchen window.  
Shane and Nicky were in the backyard, kicking a soccer ball back and forth. Peter smiled, happy to see his son enjoying a form of sport. He knew the soccer ball belonged to Nicky as Shane had never showed any interest in the sport.

He opened the back door and called out to the two lads. Shane waved and grinned at his father. He nodded his head then ducked back inside the house.

Nicky picked up his soccer ball and walked over to Shane.  
“You think he knows?” Shane asked him.  
“Knows what?” Nicky replied.  
“What you and I spent the last hour doing…?”  
“He’s going to assume we were out here, not in your bed… Doing naughty things”

Shane smirked at the memory but resisted the urge to touch Nicky. He wasn’t sure where his father was or if he could see them.

Shane and Nicky made their way inside and found Peter boiling the kettle. They declined his offer of tea or coffee and Shane went to see what was for dinner. Peter engaged Nicky in a conversation about his scholarship and Shane pretended not to listen, especially when he father mentioned that Shane was yet to choose a College for himself.

The brunette busied himself by getting plates and cutlery assembled. He then started placing generous amounts of food on all the plates. His mother arrived home while Shane was preparing the meals. She immediately pulled Nicky into a hug and held him to her. Nicky was very touched by the affection and acceptance she showed him; he was more than happy to return the embrace with equal affection.  
The four of them sat around the table, eating Chinese take out and sharing funny stories. Mae opened a bottle of wine with dessert but went up to bed not long after. Peter followed several minutes later as they both had work in the morning. 

With a promise to keep the noise level down, Shane & Nicky adjourned to the Study and closed the door. Nicky sat down on the couch while Shane went over to the bookcase and retrieved a book. He then walked over to the couch and sank down beside the blonde.

“What have you got there?” Nicky asked him.  
“Just close your eyes” Shane said. “And listen”  
“Is this something you wrote?”  
“If only I could write this good... Now close your eyes”  
Nicky moved closer to the brunette and lowered his head onto Shane’s shoulder before closing his eyes.

Shane’s voice filled the room and sent Nicky’s heart in a flutter.  
“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.   
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height   
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight   
For the ends of being and ideal grace” 

Shane’s voice began to quiver but he soldiered on and read the entire sonnet to his love.  
“Wow” Nicky whispered. He opened his eyes and looked down at the book open in Shane’s lap. “That was beautiful”  
“I’ve been wanting to read that to you for a long time… But never had the courage… Until now”  
“Why didn’t you read me something you wrote?”  
“Because this was better”

Shane closed the book and placed it aside. Nicky was still gazing at him.  
“What?” Shane asked him.  
“You need to have more confidence” Nicky said. “You have an amazing talent and you shouldn’t let it go to waste”  
“It’s not a viable career, Nix. Dad wants me to be an accountant”  
“What do you want?”  
“I just want you”

Shane took the glass from Nicky and placed it aside before leaning forward and kissing the blonde. The older boy was still under Shane’s spell, having been won over by the romantic sonnet and he instantly submitted to the brunette. Shane kissed Nicky with as much love and passion as he could muster; his hand slid down the blonde’s body and began to unbutton his pants.  
Nicky forced his tongue into Shane’s mouth as the younger boy’s hand slid inside his boxers. He thrust his hips, wanting Shane to touch him. The brunette pulled back and smiled at him. Shane slid off the couch and knelt before Nicky, licking his lips in anticipation.

The next few minutes passed in a hazy, desperate blur as Nicky tried to remain composed while Shane teased and pleasured him. He tried to stave off his approaching orgasm, not wanting the moment to end but all too soon, he came. The blonde bit his lip to stop himself from screaming Shane’s name at the top of his lungs. The younger boy came up to meet him and they shared a tender kiss.

“Wow” Nicky panted. “You’re really getting good at that”  
“Thanks” Shane grinned. “You’re not so bad yourself”  
“You hinting at something there?”  
“No”  
Shane brought their lips together once more then leaned his hand on Nicky’s shoulder.  
“I wish we could just stay like this” Shane said.  
“For how long?” Nicky asked.  
“Forever… And ever”  
“It’s a nice thought, Shay”  
“I’m really glad you came this weekend”  
“So am I”  
Nicky placed a kiss atop Shane’s head then reached for the glass of wine. The two lads sat in silence as Nicky sipped his wine and Shane stared off into the middle-distance.

The brunette still hadn’t found the right way to tell Nicky about UCD. He wanted the older boy to know they were still going to be together but he wanted the timing to be just right. Shane reached out and slid his hand into Nicky’s. The blonde stifled a yawn and Shane smiled up at him.  
“You’re tired” Shane stated.  
“Just a little” Nicky replied. “It’s been a long day”  
“You want to head up to bed?”  
“But that would mean getting up… And moving away from you”  
“That’s okay; we’ll see each other in the morning”

Nicky reluctantly agreed and nodded his head. He downed the rest of his drink then slowly extracted himself from Shane’s embrace. The two lads then made their way upstairs, stopping in the Kitchen to rinse the wine glasses, and stopped in the hallway between their rooms.  
The house was quiet and the hall was dark. Shane couldn’t resist giving Nicky one last kiss before reluctantly pulling away.

“Good night” Shane whispered.

**--**

Shane awoke bright and early, tossing back the duvet and leaping out of bed. He checked the clock then crossed the room and opened the bathroom door. The brunette quickly passed through the bathroom and opened the adjoining door. Nicky was still fast asleep; Shane smiled at the sight.  
He walked over to the window and threw the curtains open. Light streamed into the room and Nicky groaned.

“Wake up sleepyhead” Shane said as he opened the window.  
“Shane, I’m on vacation” Nicky said. “That means I get to sleep in”

The younger boy walked over to the bed, grabbed the duvet and pulled it back.  
“Shit, Shay” Nicky cursed. “It’s fucking freezing”  
“Wimp”  
“Country bumpkin”

Nicky tried to grab the duvet from Shane but reached for the brunette instead. He slid his arm around Shane and pulled the younger boy down on top of him. Shane laughed as he fell onto the bed, straddling Nicky’s body.

“Morning Nix” Shane whispered, his face mere centimetres from Nicky’s.  
“Good morning” Nicky replied.  
“How did you sleep?” Shane asked, leaning closer.  
“Don’t even think of kissing me until you’ve brushed your teeth!”  
“Snob!”  
“Slob”

Nicky pushed Shane off him, sending the brunette crashing to the floor. They both froze, not realizing how loud the noise would be. Shane leapt to his feet and hurried into the bathroom. For Nicky’s sake, he picked up his toothbrush and started to clean his teeth. They stared at each other from across the room, wondering if they were about to have an unwanted guest. When no one knocked on the door, they breathed a sigh of relief.  
Shane finished in the bathroom then returned to Nicky’s room. He walked over to the window and looked out into the yard. His father’s car was gone. He smiled with relief then turned back to Nicky.

“Dad’s already left for work” Shane said to him.  
“So… No sneaking?” Nicky asked.  
“Exactly”  
Nicky stood up and walked over to Shane, ready to have his kiss but the younger boy pulled away.  
“I had to brush my teeth, so it’s only fair you do yours” Shane insisted.

Nicky pouted but reluctantly did as Shane asked. The brunette returned to his room to change while Nicky busied himself in the bathroom. From his position in front of the mirror, he was able to see Shane undressing in his room. Nicky smiled at the sight and hurriedly finished up.  
He then made his way into Shane’s room. The brunette was standing in front of his closet, wearing nothing but his underwear, while he tried to decide what to wear. Nicky felt himself shiver at the image before him. Sure the house had central heating but the blonde was freezing. He didn’t know how Shane could stand there in nothing but boxers.  
Nicky walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around Shane’s waist. The brunette shifted in his arms and turned his head to give Nicky his ‘good morning’ kiss. They exchanged several tender kisses and Nicky began to pull Shane towards his bed but the brunette stopped him.

“Mam’s cooking breakfast” Shane said to him. “We really should go downstairs”  
“This won’t take long” Nicky replied.  
“Come on, we’ve got all day for this”  
Nicky pouted once more but he knew he wasn’t going to win this argument. He released Shane then skulked back to his own room to get dressed. 

*

Mae was just finishing up when Shane and Nicky made an appearance. She was already dressed for work and greeted them both with a bright smile.

“Morning boys” she said.  
“Morning mam” Shane replied.  
“Good morning Mrs Filan” Nicky said.  
“You cooked” Shane grinned.  
“Of course, we have company” Mae replied.  
“He’s not company, it’s only Nicky” Shane said.  
“I’ll be the judge of that” Mae scolded her son.  
“You really didn’t have to go to so much trouble” Nicky said to her.  
“I wanted to. Normally I would be home on a Friday and be able to spend some time with you lads but I’m covering for a friend who’s daughter is sick” Mae told him. “But I suspect that last thing you want is me hanging around, annoying you all day”  
“Mam!” Shane gasped.  
She laughed, almost enjoying the way her son blushed. Nicky reached out and took hold of Shane’s hand. The sight made her smile. She checked her watch and picked up her bag.  
“Gosh, I hadn’t realized how late it was” she said, heading towards the door. “If you’d slept much later I would have missed you altogether… Anyway, I’ll be home around one for lunch… Help yourself to anything in the fridge, and don’t let your breakfast get cold”

She turned back and hugged them both before bustling out the door. They both stood in silence until the front door slammed closed behind her then Shane burst out laughing. The sound of Shane’s laughter warmed Nicky’s heart and he joined in.

“Your mother is so sweet” Nicky said to him.  
“She really goes all out when we have guests” Shane replied.  
“What’s on the stove?”  
“Everything by the looks of it”

They enjoyed a hearty meal then cleaned up after themselves. Shane even washed the dishes and put them away. It was almost eleven by the time they were finished and everything was in its rightful place.  
They both sat down at the Kitchen table while Shane finished a cup of tea.

“So… What’s the plan for today?” Nicky asked him.  
“Plan?” Shane replied. The blonde laughed.  
“Yeah, plan… What are we going to do today?”  
“Why are you asking me?”  
“Uh, because it’s your hometown and I’m a guest here…”  
“Ummmm…”  
“Shay! Didn’t you think of stuff for us to do while I was here?”  
“Of course I did” Shane insisted. “But most of them require just you and me… And neither of us wearing any clothes”  
“Shane” Nicky warned him.   
“What?” the younger boy asked with an air of innocence.  
“You make me sound like a desperate slut… Despite what you may think, I didn’t drive for three hours just to spend the weekend in bed with you”  
“You didn’t?”   
“Come on, Shay… You’ve lived here your whole life; you must know all the cool places to go and things to see”  
“It’s a small town, Nix. It’s not exactly the number one tourist stop in Ireland”  
“So call some of your friends… I’d like to meet them”  
“Most of them are away… Or at work”  
“Stop making excuses”  
“Nicky, I’m not… I want you to meet some of them but it’s hard during the day. I’ll call them later and see if they want to go for a drink tonight, how’s that sound?”  
“Fine… But what do we do until then?”

Shane smirked at the blonde.  
“We could make the most of the twelve-pack of condoms you bought yesterday” He suggested.  
“Shane” Nicky tried to hold his ground. He knew his resolve wasn’t very strong and it wouldn’t take Shane long to wear him down. As much as he wanted to spend the day in bed with the younger boy, he was curious to see more of the town where Shane had grown up.

The brunette sighed in defeat.  
“Fine, you win” Shane said to him.   
“Good for me” Nicky replied.  
“You’re going to want a warmer coat though”  
“I don’t think I packed one”  
“You can borrow one of mine”

Shane grabbed Nicky’s hand and the two of them ran up the stairs. They went into Shane’s room and the brunette grabbed two coats from his closet. He then pulled out a scarf and a pair of gloves and handed them to Nicky.  
“It’s going to be chilly” Shane said to him. “Just remember, you asked me for this”  
“I’ll keep that in mind”  
“Don’t worry, it’ll be worth it”

*

Shane still hadn’t told Nicky where they were going but the older boy decided to just go with it. They drove along in Shane’s car, singing along with the radio, and were reminded of their daily trips to school. Nicky held Shane’s scarf and gloves in his hand and hoped he wouldn’t need them but they appeared to be driving to the middle of nowhere. 

“Admit it, Shay” Nicky spoke up as a song came to an end. “You’re planning on luring me deep into the woods and having your wicked way with me?”  
“In this weather?” Shane asked. “Not likely… I don’t fancy freezing my balls off”  
“So… Why are we out here?”  
“You wanted to sight-see”

The brunette pulled the car off the road and into an empty car park. He climbed out of the car and Nicky did the same. The older boy immediately wrapped the scarf around his neck before wrestling with the gloves.  
“Huh” Shane said. “It’s not usually this deserted”  
“Maybe it’s not usually this fucking cold?” Nicky suggested.  
“It’s not that cold, you weak city boy”  
“I’m too cold to snap back at you”

Shane moved towards Nicky and wrapped his arm around the blonde’s waist. They were completely secluded out here so he wasn’t worried about seeing someone who knew him. Shane led Nicky along a path, pointing out the spot where he’d sprained his ankle as a kid. They walked along in silence until they reached their destination.

“Nicky, this is Glencar Waterfall” Shane said to him.  
“Yeah, I saw the sign back there” Nicky pointed over his shoulder.  
“Nix!”  
“Sorry, Shay”  
“Like I said, you wanted touristy”  
“It’s amazing, really… It’s just fucking cold”

The younger boy looked at Nicky and realized the blonde was shivering. He moved closer to him, with the intention of kissing him and helping warm him up but something made him stop.  
This wasn’t going the way he’d planned. Of course he’d not taken the weather into consideration when he’d thought this up. He had intended on telling Nicky about UCD when they reached the bottom of the waterfall but now it didn’t feel right.  
Especially when he thought about the time he’d come here with a group of school friends. Finnian had stolen a bottle of vodka from his parents and they’d all sat around drinking, thinking about how ‘cool’ they were. As Shane stood with his arms around Nicky, he couldn’t shake the knowledge that this was the very spot he’d shared his first kiss with Samantha.

“What’s wrong?” Nicky asked him, looking concerned. “You look… Ill?”  
Shane shook his head.  
“I’m okay” he replied. “Just… A lot of memories were created here”  
“Good or bad?”  
“Bit of both, I guess”

Nicky moved to kiss him but Shane shifted away, staring off into the distance.  
“What?” Nicky asked. “What is it?”  
“I just… Haven’t been here for a while and… Feeling nostalgic”  
“Are you going to tell me about it?”  
“I had my very first kiss here” Shane admitted to him.  
“How old were you?” Nicky enquired.  
“Fourteen… a group of us were playing truth or dare…”  
“Who was she?”  
“Well, like I keep saying, it’s a small town… Her name’s Rachel and, wait for it, she’s Samantha’s best friend”  
“No shit? Look at you, you little tramp“  
“It was just a game…” Shane trailed off. “Yet, creepily enough, I also kissed Samantha for the first time here”  
“What is this place, Sligo’s make-out point?”  
“Are you jealous?”  
“That you’ve brought me to the same place you’ve woo-ed all your other girlfriends? How far did they let you go? Second base?”  
“Does it matter?”

Nicky shifted closer to Shane and reached for his hand. He then guided the younger boy’s hand between his legs. Shane cupped Nicky’s crotch and stared into his eyes.  
“I guess it doesn’t matter” Nicky said, meeting Shane’s gaze. “Just as long as you know I’ll always go one better than them”  
Shane smiled and stopped resisting. He leaned forward and kissed Nicky.  
“If my fingers weren’t numb, I’d happily return the favour” Nicky whispered.

Without warning, the sky opened and a torrential downpour fell from above. Within seconds the two lads were drenched to the skin. Shane grabbed Nicky’s hand and the couple hurried along the path, making their way to Shane’s car. The brunette unlocked it and they jumped inside, slamming the doors closed.  
Shane put the key in the ignition to turn the heater on. The rain made a loud yet soothing noise as it danced upon the roof and windows. Nicky pulled off his borrowed scarf and gloves then tossed them onto the backseat. He looked over at Shane and grinned.

The younger boy was soaked to the bone; his wet hair was plastered to his face, making him look absolutely adorable. Nicky reached out and placed his hand on Shane’s cheek.  
“Well that sure was a mood killer” Shane said to him.  
“You’re telling me” Nicky replied.  
“Just when you thought you couldn’t get any colder…”  
“Maybe we could hop into the backseat and warm each other up?”  
“Nix, if I pulled my wet jeans off, I wouldn’t get them back on and that could raise some questions…”  
“Who’s going to see us out here?”  
“Let’s just wait for the rain to ease up and I’ll drive us home, then we can get into some dry clothes and curl up in front of the fireplace”  
Nicky could hardly say no to the idea of warm clothes and snuggling up in front of a fire with Shane.  
“I guess that sounds like a plan” Nicky said to him.  
“Just you, me, a fire and coffee…”  
“Mmmm, I can hardly wait… But can we at least make out until the rain eases up?”  
“Well… Since you asked so nicely…” Shane smirked.

**--**

Peter was just about to leave the local café and return to work with his lunch when he spotted a familiar figure. He checked his watch, decided he had time to spare and walked over to her.

“Samantha?” Peter greeted her.  
The young woman looked up from her drink, taking a moment before realizing who was talking to her.  
“Oh, hi Mr. Filan” she replied.  
“I haven’t seen you for some time…”  
“Yeah… Uh… Have a seat?”  
Peter nodded and pulled out a chair at the table in front of her.  
“You here for lunch?” she asked him.  
“Just about to head back to work, actually”  
“Oh… How are you adjusting? After the move, I mean?”  
“It’s like we were never gone”  
She nodded her head then began to toy with the straw in her glass.

“So how have you been? Like I said, I haven’t seen you for awhile” Peter said.  
“Shane and I broke up… So… I haven’t had much reason to visit”  
“Yeah, I… Shane keeps a lot to himself these days, I actually only heard about the two of you, like, a week ago”  
“Oh, so… Uh… You don’t know much about his new girlfriend then?”  
“New girlfriend? Ummm, I’m sorry but that’s news to me”  
“I had hoped that once he came home, we’d get back together but he… He said he’s moved on. He’s got someone else… And I… I was just curious… What’s she like? I mean, you must have met her, right?”  
“I… I have no idea. She’s from Dublin, you say?”  
“I guess so”  
“I’m really not the best person to be asking here… I honestly don’t recall meeting many of his friends and… He never mentioned any girl in particular. I mean, there was one that he said wanted him to take her to the Deb but as far as I know, he went alone… Or with a group of friends…”  
“So… You’re saying there might not be a girlfriend on the scene? That he was just playing with me?”  
“No, I never said that… I just… I’m really not good with stuff like this”  
“I just need to know if we might get another chance in the future… Or if he really thinks this ‘Nicky’ is the one”

“I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Peter asked her.  
“I’m sure that’s what he said” Samantha replied, casting her mind back to their conversation the day before. “He said that he’d never felt that way about anyone before and that it was ‘the real thing’ but I was hoping he was just saying that to upset me…”  
“And he told you her name?”  
“I don’t think he meant to, it just slipped out… He said Nicky”

Peter could feel his pulse beginning to quicken and he had to release his hold on his lunch, worried he was going to squeeze it out of shape.  
“Well, that’s definitely news to me” Peter said to her. “I’ll tell you what, when I get home tonight, I’ll tell him that you said hi… Maybe even encourage him to call you?”  
“Oh wow. That would be fantastic. Thank you Mr. Filan”  
“No, thank you Samantha”

On that note, Peter picked up his lunch and climbed to his feet. Once outside the café, he tossed his uneaten food into the garbage bin. He’d suddenly lost his appetite.

**--**

The drive back to Shane’s house was uneventful, despite travelling in a heavy downpour. Nicky was shivering in the seat but didn’t complain about the cold, knowing Shane would be feeling it just as much as he was. He felt so relieved when the house, and his car in the yard, came into sight. Shane pulled the car onto the lawn, trying to get as close to the front door as possible, then turned the engine off.  
The couple jumped out of the car and hurried towards the porch. The rain had eased off but not much. Shane unlocked the front door and they both went inside. 

“Shit its cold” Nicky gasped.  
“Upstairs” Shane said, grabbing Nicky’s hand.  
He led the blonde up to his room and into the bathroom. Shane turned the hot water tap in the shower on then turned to Nicky.  
“Take your clothes off” Shane said to him.  
“Why Shane…” Nicky began, coyly.  
“Now, strip!”

There was something about the commanding tone in Shane’s voice that excited Nicky. He was tempted to disobey the brunette and see if he would be punished but Shane wasn’t playing by those rules. He was already removing his own clothes. By the time Nicky realized what Shane was up to, the brunette was already naked.  
The older boy couldn’t keep his eyes off Shane as he tried to separate himself from his own sopping wet clothes. Shane climbed into the shower and let the warm water cover his body. He rinsed his hair then ran his hands all over his body, attempting to warm his shivering form.

Nicky shed the rest of his clothes and climbed into the shower with Shane. For a moment they stopped and stared at each other. This wasn’t something they’d planned on and, for some reason, felt like a big step in their relationship. It was one thing to have sex with someone but showering with them? Nicky licked his lips and wrapped his arms around Shane. Showering together somehow seemed a lot more intimate now that they were actually doing it for the first time.

Not wanting to waste water, Shane climbed out of the shower and allowed Nicky to step under the warm jets. He wrapped a towel around himself then went into his bedroom. Shane returned a moment later, dressed in sweat pants and carrying his robe. He hung the robe up for Nicky then collected their damp clothes from the floor.

“I’ll be downstairs when you’re done here” Shane said. Nicky nodded his head but was reluctant to leave the comfort of the warm water.

Shane made his way down the stairs and into the laundry. He deposited their wet clothes into the dryer and turned it on. The brunette then went into the Kitchen and filled the kettle with water.  
He was just putting the milk back in the refrigerator when Nicky appeared. He was dressed in Shane’s robe and was towelling his hair dry.

“Tea?” Shane offered.

Nicky walked over and accepted the warm mug from Shane. He couldn’t resist giving the brunette a kiss before moving away. The couple then made their way into the Living room. Shane moved towards the fireplace while Nicky took a seat on the couch.  
For a long time, neither of them spoke. Nicky sat in silence, allowing the mug to warm his fingers. Shane remained on the rug, stirring the fire.

It wasn’t long before the fire was just right and Shane sat back, admiring his effort. Nicky picked up Shane’s mug then joined him on the floor. He handed the drink to the brunette and they both sipped the warm contents.  
Nicky finished his first and placed the cup on the coffee table. He found a remote control and, assuming it operated the TV, he switched it on. The stereo lit up and music began to fill the room. Shane grabbed the remote off Nicky and pressed ‘skip’.

“Shay?” Nicky began.  
“What?” Shane replied.  
“Why did you do that?”  
“I don’t like that song”  
“You used to… We danced to it after the Deb…”  
Shane stared down at the empty mug in his hand.  
“Right… Right before I kissed you and you called me a queer” Shane stated.  
“Oh”  
“Yeah, I’m sorry if that song doesn’t hold the same meaning for me as it does to you”  
“Shane, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean…”

Nicky reached over and took the empty cup from Shane. He placed it on the table beside his then wrapped his arms around the younger boy. At first, Shane tried to fight him but Nicky was having none of it.  
“I’m sorry” he whispered. “I’m sorry I was such a jerk that night and I’m sorry for stirring up an awful memory”  
Shane closed his eyes.  
“I know you’re sorry” Shane replied. “But… It still hurts. The way you looked at me, like I was a piece of garbage that you couldn’t be bothered throwing out”  
“I didn’t mean it… I was taken by surprise and… I was a complete and total jerk… And I shouldn’t have acted the way I did”  
He leaned down and placed a kiss to Shane’s lips. The brunette was tense but Nicky was determined. He tightened his hold on the younger boy and pushed him back so they were lying on the floor. Nicky threw one leg over Shane so he was straddling the brunette between his thighs.

Nicky placed his hands on the floor, supporting his own weight and towering above Shane. Their faces were millimetres apart so he closed the gap and brought their lips together. Shane slowly raised his hand and undid the tie on the bathrobe, exposing Nicky’s naked chest. He trailed his hand along the blonde’s skin, enjoying the way Nicky’s breath hitched as he got closer to his growing hardness.  
They resumed kissing while Shane’s fingers brushed Nicky’s abdomen. The blonde closed his eyes, willing Shane to touch him but not wanting to actually beg. Nicky deepened the kiss, forcing his tongue into Shane’s mouth and thrusting his hips against him. He ground their hardness’s together in a desperate bid to urge Shane on.

He had upset the younger boy and he felt terrible about it but now was the perfect time to make it up to him. The heat from the fire made Nicky’s skin tingle and he knew that all he wanted to do right now was make love to Shane in front of the fireplace. He felt Shane’s other hand move towards the robe and he wondered what the brunette was up to.  
Shane slid his hand into the pocket and retrieved an item. Nicky broke the kiss long enough to glance down at what Shane now held in his hand. Once he saw it, he grinned and knew Shane had been thinking of this moment before walking down the stairs and possibly even before they had arrived home.

Shane dropped the box of condoms and reached up to push the robe from Nicky’s shoulders. The blonde wriggled out of it and tossed the garment aside. He was now completely naked atop of Shane. The thought of being completely naked while Shane wasn’t, sent an exhilarated shiver down his spine. This feeling, mixed with the heat of the nearby fireplace, was having very visible effects on Nicky’s body.  
He began to kiss and lick his way down Shane’s chest, pausing to tease the younger boy’s nipples. This caused Shane to groan and subtly buck his hips. Nicky reached up and slowly began to separate the brunette from his sweatpants. The blonde smirked; Shane wasn’t wearing any underwear.

“Nicky” Shane whimpered. The older boy reached for the remote control and pressed a button.  
“What are you-?” Shane tried to sit up but Nicky pushed him back down. “Not this song-”  
“Trust me, please?” Nicky said, staring intently into Shane’s eyes.

Shane could feel tears beginning to form in his eyes; the memory still too fresh (and painful) in his mind. Nicky reached up and gently stroked the brunette’s cheek.  
“I love you” Nicky whispered. “And I promise I’ll never hurt you like that again”  
Before Shane could respond, Nicky leaned down and took Shane’s weeping hardness into his mouth.

“Fuck, Nicky” Shane exclaimed. Nicky released Shane’s cock and grinned up at him.   
“We will” The blonde assured him.

Nicky resumed his assault on his lover’s cock, causing Shane to bite his lip in an attempt to hold back another moan. The older boy had one very skilled tongue. Shane looked down in mild fascination at the way Nicky’s tongue worked him.  
The blonde bobbed his head up and down as he took Shane’s cock in and out of his mouth. He stroked his fingers along the younger boy’s inner thigh. Shane closed his eyes as Nicky’s index finger breached his crack.

“Ohhhh” Shane groaned. “A warning would have been nice”  
“Where’s the fun in that?” Nicky said, his voice muffled by Shane’s cock.

Nicky continued his treatment of Shane’s cock while working his finger in and out of his hole. The added stimulation proved too much for the younger boy and Shane came, moaning his love’s name and panting for breath.  
“God, I love you” Shane managed to choke out.  
“I love you too” Nicky said to him.  
“So… We just went to third base huh?”  
“About to hit a home run I’d say”

Shane reached for the box of condoms and quickly pulled one out. He tore the packaging open as he looked up into Nicky’s eyes. The blonde nodded his head before leaning down and nuzzling his face against Shane’s neck. The younger boy took hold of Nicky’s cock and eased the condom onto it. 

“Do you…” Nicky whispered. “Lube?”  
Shane shook his head. He placed his hand on Nicky’s cheek and brought the older boy’s face in line with his, staring into his eyes.  
“I can take it” Shane said to him.  
“Are you sure?”  
“Yeah”  
“I don’t want to hurt you”  
“You won’t… Just… Please?”

Nicky nodded his head then leaned forward and kissed him. He shifted his position, parting Shane’s legs and gaining better access. His hand was shaking as he gripped his cock and guided it towards the brunette’s hole. Nicky was nervous, afraid of hurting the younger boy but Shane had nothing but faith in the blonde. As he breached his lover, he saw the look of pain that crossed Shane’s face and immediately stopped.

“Shay?” Nicky whispered.  
Shane opened his eyes and looked up at him.  
“It’s okay, don’t stop” Shane said to him.

The blonde was hesitant but he could see the need in Shane’s eyes. He nodded his head then pushed forward, filling the brunette completely. Shane groaned and threw his head back, almost connecting with the floor.  
Nicky slid his arm under Shane and held him up, bringing his face closer to his own and kissing him deeply.

“Easy, Shay” Nicky said. “Don’t give yourself a concussion”

Their bodies melded together as their hands and lips began to explore each other. The heat from the fire mixed with the intensity of their love-making made Nicky forget how cold he’d been earlier that morning. A fine layer of sweat was forming along his forehead but he ignored it, choosing to focus on the sounds his lover was making.

“Love you” Shane whispered. “Love this… Need this”  
Nicky reached down and took hold of Shane’s cock, working it in time with his thrusts. This action caused the desired effect on the brunette and he smiled.  
“Don’t stop” Shane moaned. “Never stop”  
Nicky laughed and the sound sent a shiver down Shane’s spine.  
“I… I’m not going to last long”  
“Neither am I”

They continued at a frantic pace. Shane’s fingers digging in to Nicky’s shoulder while the blonde’s hand worked his hardness. Their eyes locked as Nicky’s cock brushed against Shane’s prostate. The added stimulation sent Shane over the edge and he came. Seconds later, Nicky cried out as he shot his load.  
The two lads collapsed in exhaustion and lay together in front of the fire. Shane was covered in his own seed but he didn’t care; getting cleaned up meant leaving Nicky’s side and he wasn’t ready to do that just yet.  
Shane rolled onto his side and looked at the blonde. Nicky was grinning at him, still panting for breath. Shane covered the space between them and placed a gentle, tender kiss to his lips.

“Are you okay?” Nicky asked him. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”  
“It was perfect” Shane replied.  
“I love you”  
“I’m going to UCD”  
“What? What did you just say?”  
Shane reached out and gently stroked Nicky’s cheek.  
“I got accepted to University College Dublin… So I’m going” Shane said to him.  
“What? Are you… Are you serious?” Nicky stammered.  
Shane nodded his head.  
“Oh Shay…”

Nicky couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He was almost embarrassed by the fact that his eyes were filling with tears. The blonde reached out and held Shane’s hands in his. He looked into his eyes then threw himself at the brunette, crushing their lips together.

“I… I can’t believe it” Nicky said after breaking the kiss.  
Shane was smiling, Nicky’s reaction was almost identical to the way he’d imagined it to be.   
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? How long have you known?” Nicky wanted to know.  
“A few weeks… I got the letter and just… I just knew I was meant to go there… To be with you. And… And I wanted to tell you straight away but I… I didn’t want to tell you over the phone. I wanted to be able to tell you in person… Then, once you got here, I just couldn’t find the right way or the right time… It just slipped out then”  
“Your timing was perfect… The perfect ending to an amazing afternoon”  
“I knew we’d find a way to be together”  
“And you’re sure? You’re sure UCD is the best place for you?”  
“You’ve got your scholarship, and the best place for me is where you are”  
“And your father’s okay with that?”  
“He still doesn’t know” Shane admitted. “Mam does… But he doesn’t. I haven’t been able to tell him… He wants me to go to London and be an accountant. I want to go to UCD and study what I want”  
“You’re going to study English? Become a writer?”  
“I am” Shane said, nodding his head and smiling at Nicky.

The blonde couldn’t resist leaning in for one more kiss. Shane’s admission had filled his heart in a way he’d never thought possible. The younger boy had made the decision to change his entire future for Nicky. He’d never felt so loved in his entire life as he did right now.

“Gosh, Shay” Nicky said. “If I wasn’t so exhausted, I’d want to make love to you again”  
“Maybe later” Shane replied. “Once we get home”  
“We are home”  
“I thought you wanted to meet my friends”  
“Guess I’d rather stay in and fuc-”  
Shane cut Nicky off mid-sentence with a forceful kiss.  
“My parents will be home tonight” Shane said. “We should go out, have some fun”  
“We should probably get cleaned up” Nicky replied.  
“They won’t be home for hours”  
“But we’re all sticky”  
“I know… But I’m all warm and comfortable”  
“Yeah, so am I”

Nicky shifted closer and wrapped his arm around Shane, pulling the brunette to him. Once again, he nuzzled his face against the back of Shane’s neck and began to place gentle kisses to his skin. The brunette lay on his side, gazing into the fireplace and allowing the heat to wash over him. He reached down and placed his hand over Nicky’s, gently stroking the back of his palm.  
The blonde’s kisses stopped and his breath began to tickle Shane’s neck. He looked over his shoulder and smiled at Nicky’s sleeping form. He continued to stroke Nicky’s hand until he dozed off himself. 

**--**

Shane wasn’t sure why he was so nervous about introducing Nicky to his friends. It wasn’t like he was worried they wouldn’t like him or anything. Nor did he think they’d be able to determine the true relationship he had with the blonde. But for some reason, his hands couldn’t stop trembling.  
As they walked down the street, Nicky could see the effect the younger boy’s nerves were having on him and he wanted to reassure him. Instinct was telling him to hold Shane’s hand but he knew it was too risky.

“Shay, it’s going to be okay” Nicky said to him.  
“I’ve known these lads all my life and” Shane replied. “I hope they don’t change your opinion of me”  
“Shane, I love you and nothing’s going to change that. Weird friends or not”  
“I sure hope so”  
“What if they don’t like me?”  
“How could anyone not like you?”  
“You know the whole small town vs. big city thing”  
“None of that’s going to matter. I mean, you didn’t show me any hostility for being from a small town… Why would they treat you any differently for being from Dublin?”  
“Some people are just like that”

The two of them continued walking towards their destination. Once outside, Nicky stopped to check the name of the place. McCarthy’s.   
“So… What’s so great about this place?” Nicky asked.  
“Well, everyone who’s anyone goes to this bar across town called O’Malley’s. We used to go there but this place is much more fun… On Friday nights, they turn the karaoke machine on”  
“Oh”  
“Don’t worry, I won’t make you get up and sing”  
“Good to know”

Shane pushed the door open and went inside. His eyes scanned the room and he spotted his friends sitting at a booth in the far corner.  
“Good, they got our regular table” Shane said.  
“You have a regular table?” Nicky asked. “But you’re barely eighteen”  
“We’ve been coming here for years… You don’t have to buy alcohol here… And karaoke’s for everyone… Come on, here we go!”

The younger boy took the lead and they made their way across the bar. One of the lads looked up and smiled at Shane.  
“Ah, the prodigal son has returned!” he shouted as he leapt to his feet.  
“Hi lads” Shane greeted them. “Long time no see”  
The brunette, who was standing, leaned over and hugged Shane. He’d not seen Shane since he’d moved back home. Shane shook hands with the other lad.

“Lads,” he began. “This is Nicky”  
“Hi” Nicky nodded his head.  
“This is Mark and that’s Wallace” Shane introduced the three lads. “Where’s Ki?”  
“On his way” Wallace replied. He held his hand out and shook Nicky’s.  
“It’s nice to meet you” Mark said, offering his hand to Nicky.  
“So, you’re a city boy then?” Wallace asked.  
“Born and raised in Dublin” Nicky replied.  
“Going to College there too?”  
“Of course”  
“Well, you’ve just earned your nickname them”  
“Excuse me?”  
“You mean Socks hasn’t told you about our nicknames?” Mark asked him.  
“I’m sorry, Socks?” Nicky replied looking at Shane.

“I’m gonna get some drinks” Shane spoke up. The brunette then hurried away from the booth. Mark pulled Nicky into the seat beside his and continued talking to him.  
“Yeah, he’s had that nickname since he was twelve”  
“And what’s yours?”  
“Hootie” Mark said. “Coz I used to be obsessed with Doctor Who”  
“Used to?” Wallace pipped up.  
“Shut up”  
“How did Shane get his?” Nicky asked.  
“It’s silly really…” Mark said, grinning. “One day he came to school wearing 2 different socks and we still take the piss out of him for it”   
“You’re going to be called Dublin… Not very original but we’re short on time” Wallace said. “I’m Wally but not for the obvious reason… It’s coz I couldn’t find him despite the book being all about looking for him”  
“And our other friend, Kian, well… He’s just Keano… For lack of anything better to call him”

Shane returned to the table with a round of drinks and sat down beside Nicky. They all sipped their drinks while filling Nicky in on old times. The blonde enjoyed hearing stories of Shane’s youth from the people who knew him so well but a part of him felt guilty too. He knew it was hard on Shane, keeping their relationship a secret from his parents but it was another thing hiding it from his friends.  
The time flew by and they were all having a laugh when the last member of their group arrived. Nicky was introduced to Kian who sat down and immediately joined in on the fun.

Around 9 o’clock, the owner switched on the karaoke machine and a line immediately formed beside it. Nicky cast a sideways glance at Shane but didn’t say anything. He could see how eager the brunette was to get up and sing.  
The evening wore on and the five lads managed to get drunker and drunker. Mark jumped up on the stage and performed a rather hilarious rendition of ‘Rhinestone Cowboy’ which raised a few eyebrows but everyone was having too much fun to question.

“So Dublin” Wallace addressed Nicky. “You gonna show us how it’s really done?”  
“Nope” Nicky grinned. “I don’t sing in public”  
“I would…” Shane spoke up. “But I’m too trashed”

“I’m actually gonna call it a night” Mark said. “I have to work tomorrow”  
“Can’t you just keep the shop closed?” Kian asked.  
“Nah, I can’t do that… Again”   
Wallace and Shane both laughed.  
“You’re such a party pooper” Shane said.  
“Hey, you wanted me to come and meet Nicky… I came, we met, we drank… Now I’m drunk and am going to have to work with a hangover”  
“Good luck with that” Wallace said.  
“I’m gonna need it” Mark replied as he picked up his jacket. “It was nice to meet you, Dublin… Hope to catch you another time”  
He shook hands with Nicky once more then headed for the door.

Once he was gone, the four remaining lads ordered another round of drinks. Kian winced as a group of drunk girls massacred a Britney spears song.  
“Like you could do it any better” Wallace said, laughing at the pained expression on his friend’s face.  
“I could… I’m just choosing not to” Kian replied. “Hey Shane, isn’t that Samantha?”  
The four of them turned and looked towards the stage. The girl Nicky had met in the grocery store was standing near the machine. He wasn’t sure if she’s seen them or not and he hoped she didn’t come over.

“Oh crap” Shane moaned. “Yeah, that’s her… And Rachel”  
“They don’t usually come here” Wallace spoke up.  
“I uh…” Nicky began. “I think she’s looking for me”  
“What?” Shane and Kian asked. Nicky didn’t like the way Shane was looking at him.  
“I met her yesterday but didn’t tell her my name… She was chatting me up and I gave her the brush off”  
“Why? She’s hot” Kian said.  
“You got a girlfriend back home?” Wallace asked. “Coz you know… She wouldn’t have to find out, unless you told her”

Unbeknownst to them, Samantha had spotted Shane. She had gone to O’Malley’s, hoping to run into the blonde again but he’d been a no show. With Rachel on her side, she’s decided to head to McCarthy’s as she knew there was a good chance Shane would be there.  
The brunette had given her the brush off but she wasn’t going to let that happen again. Since she didn’t know who the blonde stranger was, she’d decided to focus her attention on Shane tonight.

Nicky shifted in the seat, keeping his back to her and hoping she wouldn’t recognize him. He picked up his drink and downed the remaining contents. He was already feeling tipsy but knew he was going to require more alcohol to survive the evening with her.  
The blonde cast a look at Shane, trying to apologize for not telling him about his run in with her. The younger boy met his eye for a moment but didn’t acknowledge the apology in any way.  
Nicky was about the say something but Wallace returned with another round of drinks. He reached for a glass just as the next song began to play. All eyes turned towards the stage as Samantha started singing.

Kian sniggered and nudged Wallace with his elbow.  
“That’s kinda a stretch” Kian joked. “Wouldn’t you say?”  
“No kidding” Wallace agreed.  
They looked over at Shane and wondered if he understood the irony of Samantha singing about being a virgin.

“Gonna give you all my love, boy. My fear is fading fast. Been saving it all for you. ‘Cause only love can last” Samantha sang as she moved across the stage in what Nicky assumed was meant to be a ‘sexy’ dance.  
He looked over at Shane but the brunette was watching him instead of Samantha. Nicky turned away so his back was towards the stage. For some reason, it appeared darker in the bar than before. Shane suspected Samantha had had the lights turned down so all eyes would be on her.

The blonde cast a quick look at Kian and Wallace but both of them were gazing at Samantha. Shane slid his hand under the table and placed it on Nicky’s thigh. Keeping his eyes fixed on Nicky’s, he began to move his lips along to the words of the song.   
“Like a virgin… Touched for the very first time…”  
Shane slid his hand up further and cupped Nicky’s groin. The blonde bit his lip but didn’t break eye contact with Shane. He lifted his foot and started rubbing it against the younger boy’s leg.   
It became increasingly easier to block out Samantha’s voice and Nicky kept his eye on the other two lads at the table. Any second now, one of them might glance their way and see the way Shane was ‘singing’ to Nicky.

“You’re so fine and you’re mine… I’ll be yours till the end of time”  
Nicky was the first to cave in to temptation. He gave a slight wink to Shane who immediately stopped his fondling. Nicky pushed his chair back and stood up, stating he was going to the bathroom. A moment later, Shane stood up.  
“Uh, bathroom” he said to Kian. “Nicky doesn’t know where it is”

Shane stood up and followed the blonde towards the bathroom. They went into the men’s room and were happy to find it empty. Assuming all the lads in the bar were fixated on Samantha’s performance. Shane led Nicky into one of the stalls then closed and locked the door.  
He pushed the blonde against the wall and crushed their lips together in a fierce, desperate kiss. Nicky thrust his hips against Shane, whimpering into kiss.

“I have never been so turned on by this song” Shane said.  
“Are you sure it’s not because of who’s singing it?” Nicky asked.  
“Well, maybe you should have gotten up and sang it instead?”  
The brunette slid his hand inside Nicky’s jeans and began stroking him. They knew they didn’t have much time but the blonde was already close. It only took several hard strokes for him to shoot his load. Shane wiped him clean with some toilet paper then they left the stall. The bathroom was still empty.

“Wow, how lucky is that?” Shane asked as he walked to the sink and washed his hands. Nicky smiled at his reflection in the mirror.  
“Very” Nicky agreed. “Now let’s go home”  
“You want to leave now?”  
“Do you want to stay here with Samantha?”  
“Good point”

By the time the two lads left the bathroom, Samantha had finished her song and was being accosted by several drunken lads. Shane saw it as the perfect opportunity to take off. Claiming Nicky to be a cheap drunk and needed to go home and sleep it off, Shane bid his friends goodnight. They all shook hands and agreed to meet up again before Nicky left town.  
Shane led Nicky towards the door and looked over his shoulder. Samantha had spotted them and was trying to extract herself from the group of lads. Shane moved faster, urging Nicky to do the same and he didn’t release a sigh of relief until they were safely three blocks away.

“You know, I think I am a cheap drunk” Nicky said to him.  
“You held your own with my friends though” Shane replied. “I think they like you”  
“Glad to hear it, Socks”  
“You can’t call me that!”  
“Why not?”  
“You just can’t. I won’t let you”  
“And how, exactly, are you going to stop me?”  
“Uh, with-holding sex?”  
“You wouldn’t last a day”  
“Wouldn’t I?”  
“No… But it’s not a challenge! I just… I won’t call you that again, okay?”  
“Okay”

The two lads made the slow trek back to Shane’s house. It was a chilly night but Nicky wasn’t as cold as he’d been out by the waterfall. His mind suddenly filled with the memory of how they’d warmed each other up afterwards and he grinned to himself. They had successfully cleaned up after themselves so that Shane’s parents were none the wiser when they’d arrived home. It helped that their clothes were dry by then so Nicky wasn’t still walking around the house wearing Shane’s robe.

Shane quietly unlocked the front door and the two of them made their way inside. The house was dark so they kept their voices down, to avoid waking his parents. Too exhausted to do anything but climb into bed, Shane went into his bedroom and stripped off to his underwear. In the next room, Nicky did the same.  
The brunette pulled back the duvet and was about to slid between the sheets when Nicky’s arms appeared around his waist. Shane turned around and wrapped his arms around the blonde’s neck.

“Just wanted to kiss you goodnight” Nicky said to him. “And thank you… I’m really glad I got to meet your friends”  
“I’m really glad too” Shane replied.  
Nicky leaned forward and kissed Shane’s lips.  
“Goodnight” he said as he released the younger boy.  
“Don’t” Shane said, not letting him go. “Don’t leave. Stay here tonight”  
“I don’t know…”  
“Please? Just for tonight”  
“Okay. Does the door lock?”  
“It does”

Shane loosened his hold on Nicky then hurried to the door. He flicked the lock so the door was firmly secure then moved back to his bed. Nicky was already under the duvet so Shane climbed in beside him. He turned the lamp off, sending the room into darkness. Shane slid closer and pressed himself against Nicky’s back, sliding his arm around his waist.  
“If I wasn’t so drunk” Shane whispered. “I’d make love to you, right now”  
“I know you would” Nicky replied, smiling into the darkness.  
“Just think, in a few weeks, we’ll be able to fall asleep like this every night”  
“Yeah” Nicky yawned. “But with all the sex we’re going to be having, when will find time to go to class?”  
“Let’s not worry about that right now”  
“Okay… Goodnight”  
“Goodnight”

**--**

The following morning, Nicky awoke before Shane. He reluctantly slid out from under the warm covers and quietly made his way to the other bedroom. The blonde climbed into the cold bed and tried to fall back asleep but he couldn’t. He was relieved that he didn’t feel overly hung-over, despite how much alcohol he’d drunk the night before.  
Nicky lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling and wishing that Shane was lying beside him.

He lay there for almost half an hour then decided he couldn’t take any more. Nicky got out of the bed and went into the bathroom. He shed his clothes and stepped into the shower. 

Shane awoke to the sound of running water and he rolled over. The bed beside him was empty. He sat up and looked into the bathroom. Nicky’s clothes were on the floor and he contemplated getting up to join the blonde. He was almost to the door when he heard a knock. Shane pushed the bathroom door to then opened the bedroom door.

“Just wanted to make sure you got home okay” his mother said.  
“Yeah, we weren’t overly late either” Shane replied. “But you and dad were already asleep”  
“I’m going to make pancakes, if you’re interested”  
“Wow, yum. Thanks mam”  
She nodded then moved away from the door. Shane pushed it closed then turned back to the bathroom. The shower was no longer running so he pushed the door open. Nicky was drying himself with a towel.

“Morning Shay” Nicky greeted him.  
Shane felt himself blushing, not realising he’d been staring while Nicky could see his reflection in the mirror.  
“Oh, now you’re embarrassed?” Nicky asked. “I wouldn’t have thought… Given what we’ve done, nothing would make you blush anymore”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders then walked over to Nicky.  
“You’re just… Sometimes it’s hard for me to comprehend that someone like you would want someone like me”  
“Why wouldn’t I?”  
“Well, you’re so… So… You don’t see how beautiful you are”  
“I know I’m okay looking…” Nicky turned and wrapped his arms around Shane. “But, sometimes, when I look at you, all I can think is how perfect you are”

“Mam’s making pancakes” Shane stated.  
“Whoa, bit of a segue there” Nicky replied.  
“What?”  
“You changed the subject quickly”  
“Yeah, well, I’m hungry”  
“Was the conversation getting a bit too ‘gay’ for you?”  
“Why would you say something like that?”   
“You always get uncomfortable when I compliment you”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders.   
“I don’t know, I’m just not used to hearing stuff like that”  
“From a guy”  
“From anyone”  
“Well, you better get used to it. Coz once we get to UCD, I’ll be telling you so every day”  
“Seriously?”  
“Seriously… Every day until you start to believe me”  
Shane smiled and buried his face in Nicky’s neck.   
“You’re too good to me” Shane said.  
“I am” Nicky agreed. “But trust me, you’re absolutely worth it”

*

Nicky made his way downstairs while Shane was in the shower. He took the steps two at a time and bounced into the Kitchen. Shane’s mother was by the stove and his father was sat at the table. Mae smiled at him as he walked into the room, Peter nodded his head.

“I’m only going in for a couple of hours” Peter said to Mae. “So I’ll be home before lunch, I promise”  
“Remember we’re having lunch with Oliver and Marie today” Mae replied.  
“I haven’t forgotten. I just, may have to meet you there”

Nicky walked over to the kettle and Mae handed him a mug. He smiled his thanks then proceeded to make himself a cup of tea. By the time he’d taken a seat at the table, Shane was bounding down the stairs.  
“Morning” Peter greeted his son.  
“Good morning dad” Shane replied, sliding into a seat beside Nicky. “Morning Nix”  
Nicky was sipping his tea and smiled, his grin hidden behind the cup. Shane was pretending they’d not seen each other that morning. It felt sneaking and, somewhat exciting, knowing they had a secret only the two of them knew.  
“Morning Shay” Nicky replied.

Mae walked over to the table and deposited a plate of pancakes. Shane waited for Nicky to help himself but the blonde was waiting for Shane’s father. Peter was reading the paper and hadn’t even noticed the arrival of said pancakes. Shane smiled at Nicky then reached over and grabbed one off the plate, dropping it onto Nicky’s plate before taking one for himself.  
“Peter, it’ll get cold” Mae warned.  
Her husband looked up at her then down at the table. He smiled at her, apologetically, and then helped himself.

They ate in silence as Mae cooked up another batch before joining them at the table. Nicky knew Peter was heading off to work but he found it strange that Shane hadn’t questioned his father’s attire.  
“I have to run some errands this morning” Mae addressed her son. “And your father is, as usual, stopping by the office for a few hours. Then he and I will be having lunch with Marie and Oliver”  
“That sounds nice”  
“If Mark’s home,” Peter spoke up, “we could send him around here to keep you two company”  
“I think Mark said he was working today” Shane said. “Actually, yeah, he would be if his parents have plans with you two”  
“They invited us last week and I just couldn’t cancel on them” she explained to Nicky. “I would have liked to spend more time with you while you were here”  
“That’s okay, Mrs. Filan. I’d love to come back some day soon” Nicky replied. “It’s so quiet and relaxing up here… Nothing like Dublin”  
“Not too boring for you, love?”  
“Absolutely not” Nicky smiled.

“Well, I best be off” Peter stood up and took his plate over to the sink. As he headed out, he stopped and kissed his wife goodbye. “I’ll meet you over at the Feehily’s around one”  
“Don’t be late” Mae insisted.  
“I won’t be”

Shane continued eating as his father disappeared out the door. There was something about the way his father didn’t seem to want to look at him that made him feel uneasy. He glanced at Nicky but the older boy was talking to his mother. Once there was a break in the conversation, Shane cut in.

“You said you have to run some errands” Shane began. “So you’ll be driving into town then?”  
“Yes, it’s too cold to walk” Mae smiled.  
“Can we get a ride?”  
“Where are we going?” Nicky asked Shane.  
“To annoy Mark at work”  
“Is that a good idea?”  
“Trust me, it’ll be fun!”

**--**

Shane was laughing so hard that he almost had tears in his eyes. Nicky was giggling too but he wasn’t able to figure out what was that funny. When the two lads had arrived at the store Mark’s parent’s owned, Wallace was there and he appeared to be there for the same reason as Shane.  
Mark was nearing the end of his tether and it wasn’t even eleven o’clock.

The younger boy had hustled them out of the store within fifteen minutes and Shane had been laughing the entire time. Nicky assumed he’d missed something as he couldn’t recall anything funny actually happening while they were in the store.  
Wallace suggested they go for a coffee, to keep out of the cold, and Shane agreed. The three of them made their way to a nearby café and sat at a table.  
Shane went to get their drinks, leaving Nicky alone with Wallace.

“I don’t understand,” Nicky spoke up. “What was so funny?”  
“You were laughing” Wallace replied.  
Nicky bit his lip. Honestly, he’d only been giggling because Shane’s laughter had made him feel all tingly inside.  
“It seemed like the thing to do” Nicky said.  
“I left something under the counter for him… And it’s going to start smelling really rank, really soon”  
“You’re kidding?”  
“Nope… We do it all the time. To see how long it takes for him to notice the smell and find the rotting item. Once it took nearly a week… His dad wasn’t too happy about that”  
“Can’t imagine why”  
“Come on, Dublin… You so need a sense of humour”

Shane returned with their warm drinks and took a seat at the table.  
“So how did the two of you end up as friends?” Wallace asked. “You seem like… Chalk & cheese…”  
“What do you mean?” Shane asked.  
“I mean, look at you… The poet and the jock? It’s like the head of the science club became best friends with the captain of the football team”  
“I’m not in the science club” Shane replied.  
“It was just an example” Wallace said.

Nicky and Shane exchanged the quickest look. They’d practiced this answer before, not really wanting to admit how they’d really met. Nicky didn’t want anyone to know his friends had been bullying Shane.  
“Ended up having a bunch of classes together” Nicky replied. “Pretty boring story, we ran into each other in the library one afternoon and got to talking”  
“Nicky took pity on me because I was new and didn’t have any friends” Shane added.  
“Turned out we had a bunch of stuff in common, sure not the main stuff but all these little things” Nicky said. “And we didn’t live too far away from each other so it was also a convenience thing”  
“You got a girlfriend?” Wallace enquired.  
“Not really”  
“What’s that supposed to mean? You’re fucking her but not actually dating?”  
“No, I uh… I’m in between relationships right now. But we parted on friendly terms… And we’re going to different colleges too so…”  
“That’s a shame… But think of all the new girls you’ll get to do once you get to college… Me? It’s what I’m looking forward to the most”  
“That’s good to know, Wally” Shane replied before taking a sip of his coffee.

“Hey, you never told me where you ended up?” Wallace said looking at Shane. “Where are you heading off to? London?”  
“Uh, Dublin actually” Shane admitted.  
“Trinity?”  
“No… And I’m not studying business either. I’m majoring in English”  
“Really? You’re finally going to do it?”  
“I am” Shane sighed. “I just… Haven’t told my father yet”  
“Oh”  
“Yeah, oh”  
“What are you going to do?”  
“I’m putting it off as long as I can. Mam knows about the college choice but not about changing my major”  
“Won’t he be mad?”   
“He’ll be furious… All my life, all he’s ever talked about is me becoming an accountant and working with him… But I’ve never wanted that”  
“Have you ever showed him your writing?” Nicky spoke up. “Surely if he read some of it, he’d see how talented you are”  
“He doesn’t care” Shane replied. “No, that’s a lie. He just… Doesn’t see a future in it”  
“But he knows you’ve got a gift, right?”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders.  
“Can we not talk about this anymore? Please?” Shane asked.

Nicky and Wallace exchanged a look but immediately dropped the subject.  
“So, do you have a current girlfriend?” Nicky asked Wallace.  
“I’ve got two” he grinned. “Well, there’s one that I haven’t gotten around to breaking up with yet”  
“That’s terrible!”  
“But fun”  
“Gosh Shane, I hope you don’t start taking after your friends”  
“Ha! Not Mr. Prude here” Wallace laughed. “The only lad in Sligo to be going off to college a virgin”

Shane felt his cheeks beginning to flush but he couldn’t run away. Wallace had always teased him about sex but this time it felt more embarrassing.  
“Wally” Nicky didn’t know how to respond. Should he stand up for his love or get in on the joke with Wallace. “I don’t see anything wrong with being a virgin”  
“Come on!” Wallace rounded on Nicky. “Surely you’re not….?”  
“And what if I am?” Nicky held his ground, staring him down.  
“You can’t be serious? A good looking lad like you? Were you a major jock at your school?”  
“Yes, I’m going to college on a soccer scholarship. I played every sport I could and in junior year, I even went out with a cheerleader”  
“And you couldn’t seal the deal?”  
“I never wanted to. When I have sex, it’ll be on my terms and not just because everyone is doing it… Or for bragging rights. My sex life is just that ‘mine’ and its no one else’s business what I am or am not doing”

On that note, the conversation came to an abrupt end. Wallace chose not to push Nicky any further. Shane watched his two friends in silence. He focused more on Wallace and could see his opinion of Nicky changing before his eyes. Shane was happy to see admiration in Wallace’s eyes.  
In that moment, Shane wanted to kiss Nicky but knew he couldn’t. He made a promise to himself that the second he got Nicky home, he’d give him the best blowjob he’d ever had.  
The three of them sat in silence for a few minutes, no one willing to speak up. They had acknowledged the previous conversation was over but none were ready to strike up a new one.

Shane finished his drink and held the empty mug in his hand. He glanced at his watch and checked the time.  
“Uh, Nix?” Shane said. “If we want a lift home, we have to meet mam in ten minutes”  
“Oh, okay” Nicky replied. “Unless you want to stay longer?”

“I really have to get going” Wallace spoke up. “I promised I’d take my sister for a bike ride before the weather got too bad. They’re predicting a storm tonight or tomorrow”  
“See you, Wally” Shane said to him.  
The older boy nodded, downed the rest of his drink then stood up.  
“Later lads” Wallace said.

Nicky and Shane watched him go, both breathing a sigh of relief once he was out of sight. Shane leaned back in his chair and smiled.  
“He seems like a lot of hard work” Nicky stated.  
“Is he ever” Shane agreed. “But he’s one of my best friends and I wouldn’t change a thing about him”  
“Does he often push your buttons?”  
“Not really… Well, he teases me about the whole sex thing but… It’s not like I can tell him the truth”  
“You could tell him a version of the truth…” Nicky said, lowering his voice. “That it was with someone you met in Dublin”  
“And when he asks for all the ‘gory’ details?” Shane asked. “Which is mostly ‘how big were her tits’?”  
“Is that all that matters to him?”  
“Yeah, pretty much” Nicky shook his head in disbelief.

“Come on,” Shane said. “We better get going or we’ll have to walk home”  
“Okay” Nicky replied.  
He finished the last few mouthfuls of his drink then picked up his jacket. He pulled it on as they headed toward the door. It was raining lightly as they made their way down the street to Mae’s car.  
“How about a movie when we get home?” Shane asked Nicky.  
“Got anything in mind?” Nicky asked.  
“No, we’ll decide when we get there”

*

Mae stayed long enough to change into nicer clothes then hurried out the door. Shane and Nicky were in the Kitchen as she shouted a quick goodbye to them. Nicky laughed but Shane just rolled his eyes.

“I think it’s sweet” Nicky said to him. “I mean, who wouldn’t enjoy lunch with friends?”  
“Yeah but lunch usually ends up spreading into afternoon tea then dinner” Shane explained. “We probably won’t see my parents until lunch time tomorrow”  
“Really?” Nicky asked.  
“Well, I wouldn’t put money on it but don’t be surprised if they don’t come home tonight”  
“And they leave you to fend for yourself?”  
Shane shrugged. “I usually go out with Mark or he comes around here and we watch movies or TV”  
“You think he’ll come around tonight?”  
“Don’t know… Do you want him to?”  
“Maybe… Although, I don’t think he’ll be too happy with you, given what Wallace left in the shop for him to find”  
“Oh yeah” Shane laughed. “He might want to come round and beat me up… He always blames me”  
“I can vouch for you and we can send him to beat Wallace up?”  
“Could be worth a try… But I think I’d prefer us to just be alone tonight”  
“Oh really?”  
“Yes, really”  
“And why would that be?”  
“Gee, I don’t know…”

Shane approached Nicky from behind and slid his arms around his waist.  
“You think we haven’t had enough ‘alone time’ yet?” Nicky asked him.  
“I could never have enough alone time with you” Shane replied.  
“You’re such a romantic”  
They separated then Nicky picked up the sandwiches he’d helped Shane prepare. The brunette picked up two glasses and a bottle of soft drink then led the way into the Living room. It wasn’t cold enough to warrant lighting another fire though Shane was tempted. A part of him was very eager to re-enact their activities from the previous afternoon. He glanced at Nicky and knew the blonde was remembering the same encounter.

Shane switched the TV on and began to aimlessly scroll through the channels. He found a movie with John Travolta and shrugged his shoulders. The brunette had no intention of actually paying attention to whatever was on the screen. The couple ate in silence for several minutes, Shane watching Nicky out the corner of his eye.

“What?” Nicky asked.  
“What what?” Shane replied.  
“Out with it”  
“With what?”  
“Whatever it is you want to ask me”

Shane put his empty plate on the coffee table then turned and looked at Nicky.  
“Why did you lie to Wallace?” Shane asked him.  
“What?” Nicky replied.  
“You told him you were a virgin and there was no reason for you to do that”  
“Does it really matter?”  
“To me it does”  
Nicky pushed his plate aside then turned and mirrored Shane’s position. They sat opposite each other, looking into each other’s eyes. The blonde reached out and took hold of Shane’s hand.  
“I didn’t like the way he was making fun of you” Nicky said.  
“Nicky-” Shane began but the blonde cut him off.  
“No, I know he’s your friend” Nicky continued. “And that it’s some kind of private joke the two of you share but I don’t care. I just… I saw the look on your face and… And I wanted to help. I didn’t have anything to prove to him so I decided to push and see what he’d do”  
“But you didn’t have to. You could have told him you were this playboy who’d lost count of how many girls he’d had sex with”  
“I could have but I didn’t want to. I wanted to tell him the truth, to defend you and… And” Nicky hesitated. He gently stroked the back of Shane’s palm. “I love you and I love being with you. I would tell everyone who’d listen how much I love you and enjoy having sex with you but I can’t do that right now”

Shane leaned forward and leaned his forehead against Nicky’s.  
“I wanted to tell him that too” Shane admitted. “Hiding it and pretending it didn’t happen, it seems wrong… I’m not ashamed of what we’ve done and I’m proud of the fact that you were my first”

Nicky gently kissed Shane’s lips. They exchanged several gentle kisses, Nicky’s arms sneaking around Shane’s waist. The brunette suddenly remembered the promise he’d made himself that morning and reached for the waistband of Nicky’s pants.  
“What are you doing?” Nicky asked him.  
“What does it look like?” Shane replied.  
“Can we not?”  
“Seriously?”  
“Come on…”

Nicky stood up and pulled Shane to his feet then he led the brunette through the house and into the Study. Once inside, he walked over to the couch and sat down.  
“What are we doing in here?” Shane asked him.  
“I know you keep your work in here” Nicky replied. “I want you to read some of it to me”  
“Nix-”  
“The other night, you used someone else’s words to seduce me. Now I want to hear yours”  
“Then can we go upstairs?”  
“Yes… But not until you’ve read to me”

Shane thought it over for a moment. He’d only shown Nicky a few of his works but he had a vast variety to choose from. The blonde was right about him keeping his writings in the Study though. Shane walked over to one of the bookcases and knelt down. Tucked away on the very bottom shelf, the one shelf his father never used, were several of Shane’s favourite books. Hidden behind them were some notebooks. Shane reached for one then stopped.

“This is most of my early stuff” Shane said, turning to look at Nicky.  
“That’s okay” the blonde assured him.  
“No, it’s not” Shane replied. He jumped to his feet. “I know what I want you to hear… But it’s upstairs”

He grabbed Nicky’s hand and the older boy stood up. The two lads then made their way through the house and up the stairs to Shane’s bedroom. The brunette pushed the door open and led Nicky inside, pushing the older boy onto the bed. Nicky righted himself then focused his attention on Shane. The brunette was looking over several boxes. He pushed two aside then opened the bottom one and started rummaging through it.  
Shane stopped and pulled out a small notebook. He turned and grinned at Nicky.

“I know you were mad when you found that letter I wrote for you and had torn up” Shane said. “But I had started to write something for you and when I got home, I decided to finish it… ”

“Well this feeling, touch you and linger on your skin, or like a feather in the wind, and blow away out into space, will the memory, haunt you and bring you back again, and I wonder if you need me too, whether I’ll be meeting you”  
Shane’s voice was soft and gentle, with a hint of nervousness behind it. Nicky couldn’t take his eyes off the brunette as he spoke.

“Don’t go away, stay with me and the sun will rise, in your eyes I will be all you need. If it’s goodbye now forever, and I never get to see you again, if it’s the last kiss, before the world should end, I want to thank you for the night of my life… Thank you”

Shane closed the notebook and looked up at Nicky. The blonde was smiling at him. He could see tears in the older boy’s eyes. Shane closed the notebook and hurried over to Nicky’s side.  
“I’m sorry” Shane whispered to him.  
“For what?” Nicky asked.  
“I shouldn’t have read it… It was reminding you about that morning and…”   
Nicky raised his hand and placed it to Shane’s lips, effectively silencing the brunette.  
“It did remind me of that day” Nicky said. “And that night… And of how much it meant to both of us”  
“Nix-”  
“You captured it perfectly, Shay. How many other people get to have a poem as a reminder of the best night of their lives?”  
“That’s what I’ve called it, actually… The Night of My Life”  
“And it’s perfect” Nicky whispered. “Absolutely perfect”

Shane leaned in and captured Nicky’s lips in a deep, passionate kiss. Nicky’s body was practically trembling in his arms and he could feel the more prominent effects his words had had on the blonde.  
He slid his hand down Nicky’s chest and slid his hand inside the blonde’s pants. He felt the older boy begin to thrust into his touch. Shane nuzzled his face against Nicky’s cheek, kissing his ear and heard a low whimper emanate from the blonde’s throat.

“I feel like such a whore” Nicky whispered. “But… In a good way”  
“There’s a good way?” Shane asked him.  
“Well, knowing that I’m only whoring myself out to one man is a comfort”  
“Do you want me to start calling you my whore?”  
“Shane! How could you even ask me that?”  
“Well, you brought it up”

Shane pushed Nicky’s pants and boxers down. The blonde kicked off his shoes and slid back on the bed, giving Shane better access. The younger boy pulled Nicky’s pants and underwear clear off then dropped them on the floor.   
Nicky lay back, stretching his arm out and opening the draw beside the bed. He reached in and retrieved the box of condoms. Peering inside, he paused. If they didn’t slow down, they’d need to go buy more. The thought both terrified and excited him. The idea of lots more sex with Shane was appealing but he knew he couldn’t brave another trip to the grocery store.

Nicky looked up from the box just as Shane went down on him.  
“Oh fuck!” Nicky panted.  
He dropped the box, closed his eyes and surrendered himself to Shane’s skilled tongue.

The blonde was slightly out of breath by the time Shane moved back up his body and leaned in for a kiss. Nicky wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close, their chests pressed together and their hearts beating at a frantic pace.  
“Aren’t you getting a sore jaw yet?” Nicky asked him.  
“No” Shane replied, his lips ghosting over Nicky’s with feather light kisses.

“Ready for round two?” Nicky asked.  
“Can’t a lad catch his breath first?” Shane replied.  
“Fine… But I… Uh… I wanna get a little… Adventurous”  
“How adventurous are we talking here?”  
Nicky smirked and kissed Shane’s lips. “You’ll see”

*

Peter opened the front door and made his way up the stairs. The house was quiet and he was in a hurry. His meeting had gone longer than he’d anticipated and now he was running late for lunch. He moved along the hall to his room and quickly changed out of his work attire and into something more relaxed.  
He was in his closet, picking up a jacket when he heard a noise. He’d not heard anyone when he first came in and had assumed no one else was home.

The older man left his room, jacket in hand, and walked along the hall. The door to Shane’s room was open and he could hear inaudible sounds coming from inside. Peter knew this could be a dangerous thing to do but he was curious. Had Samantha gotten her wires crossed or was there something very wrong about his son’s friendship with Nicky?  
Peter stepped into the doorway and his heart broke.

There were just some things a parent wasn’t meant to see their only son doing and the sight before him was one he knew he’d never be able forget.  
His son was completely naked, as was Nicky. Both lads were standing in the middle of the room; Nicky was behind Shane, his arms wrapped around the younger boy’s naked body. The blonde was thrusting inside Shane, his lips placing kisses along the brunette’s neck. Nicky’s hand was wrapped around Shane’s cock and Shane, himself, had his own hand over Nicky’s encouraging his hand movements.

But what hurt most was the look of pure ecstasy on Shane’s face. Peter had never seen his son look so happy.

His instincts were telling him to march into the room and separate them. He couldn’t allow Nicky to continue molesting his only son! But his hands were shaking and he couldn’t move. Tears had formed in his eyes. He wanted to do something; anything; but he couldn’t.  
He heard his son moan the blonde’s name and it snapped him out of his trance. Peter took a step back, aware that they could have easily seen him.

With tears still in his eyes, Peter stumbled down the stairs and out the front door. He somehow made it to his car and climbed into the driver’s seat. For several minutes, he sat behind the wheel, unsure of what to do next. He wanted to go back, pull Nicky away from his son and… And what? Punch him? Kill him?  
He wiped the tears from his eyes just as his phone began to ring. His wife was calling to find out where he was. His hand was trembling as he answered the call and lifted the phone to his ear.

“Peter, dear?” Mae began. “Where are you? We’ve been waiting over half an hour”  
It took several attempts before he could form words in his mouth.  
“I’m sorry” he said. “I’m running late. I just… I stopped at home to get changed”  
“Will you be here soon?”  
“Yeah… Yes… “ he took a deep breath. “I’ll be there in about ten minutes”  
“Okay. See you soon, love”  
“Yep. Bye sweetheart”

He tossed the phone onto the seat beside him and closed his eyes. How was he going to tell Mae? He shook his head. No, his wife mustn’t find out about this. The last thing he wanted was for his wife’s heart to be as broken as his. With trembling hands, he put the key in the ignition and started the car. Peter couldn’t stop himself crying for the entire drive to the Feehily’s home.

**--**

Shane lay on his back, with one hand tucked under his head, staring up at the ceiling. He was still slightly out of breath but couldn’t stop the smile that kept forming on his lips. The brunette reached out with his other hand, groping about the duvet for Nicky’s. Their fingers met and Shane entwined their hands.

“Give me a minute, would ya?” Nicky stated. Shane laughed.  
“Its okay” Shane replied. “I don’t think I’ll be able to get it up again anytime soon”  
“Me neither”  
The younger boy rolled over and looked down at Nicky.  
“So… What made you want to try that?” Shane asked him. Nicky struggled to shrug his shoulders.  
“Saw it on TV” he replied. “Looked like a fun position”  
“What on earth were you watching?”  
“Okay, fine… I saw it on the internet” Nicky admitted. “After I did a search for it”  
Shane laughed then reached over and stroked Nicky’s cheek.  
“Did uh all of those positions come off the internet?” Shane asked.  
Nicky’s face turned slightly pink as he nodded his head.

“Do you often browse the net for stuff like that?” Shane enquired.  
“No…” Nicky confessed. “Not until you called and invited me up for the weekend”  
“Do you have any more you want to try?”  
“Not right now. I think I need time to recuperate”  
Shane nodded his head in understanding.  
“There uh there is something…” Shane stammered. He quickly trailed off, his face turning a shade much darker than Nicky had gone.  
“What?” Nicky asked, reluctantly sitting up. He reached out and gently coaxed Shane into meeting his gaze. “What is it?”  
“There’s this… Thing… I want to try but… Maybe later”  
“What? What is it?”  
“I’m not going to tell you… You might say no”  
“Shay, I trust you and I’ll do anything you want me to”  
Those few simple words sent Shane’s heart into a flutter. Staring into Nicky’s eyes, he knew the older boy meant everything he’d just said to him.

*

SLAM!

The two lads snapped to attention at the sound of the front door slamming closed.  
“Shane? Nicky?” Mae called up the stairs. “We’re home”

Reminiscent of the first time he’d almost been caught with Nicky in his bed; Shane leapt up and struggled into his sweat pants. He pushed the blonde towards the bathroom and pulled the door closed. Shane then opened his bedroom door and saw his father standing in the hall.

“Hi dad” he greeted him, remaining behind the partially closed door. “I wasn’t expecting you home so soon”  
Peter nodded his head then continued down the hall to his own room. Shane watched as his father went inside and closed the door. He turned and saw his mother coming up the stairs.

“You’re home early” Shane stated.  
“Yes” Mae replied, she lowered her voice. “Is Nicky in there?”  
Shane nodded.  
“You’re father isn’t feeling well so we came home. He’s just going to have a bit of a nap so you should try to keep the noise level down”  
He knew that was his mother’s polite way of telling them to behave.

“Mam?” Shane asked. “Would you like to meet us downstairs and we’ll watch a movie together?”  
“I’m sure you lads would rather do something more fun” Mae replied.  
“That’s a bit hard with dad just next door” Shane whispered.  
“I’ll be in the Kitchen if you need me”  
Shane smiled at her as she turned and disappeared back down the stairs. The brunette closed then locked his door then hurried into the bathroom. He walked over and locked the door leading to Nicky’s room.

“Dad’s having a nap” Shane told him. “We should probably go downstairs”  
“Shower first?” Nicky replied.  
“Definitely”  
“You go first; I’ll wait in your room”  
“No, you first” Shane said. “Besides, you’re already undressed”  
“What if your dad hears the shower going twice and wonders what we were doing that required both of us to shower afterwards?”  
“We’ll tell him we were playing soccer in the yard. He should believe that since he saw us on Thursday night”

*

Nicky made his way downstairs while Shane showered. He found Shane’s mother in the Kitchen, preparing some popcorn. The blonde walked over to her and asked if he could help. She declined and told him to take a seat at the table. Nicky did as she asked and she joined him a moment later.

“It’s been lovely having you here” Mae began. She reached out and petted his hand. “Admittedly, I haven’t really spent any time with you but I know it’s meant a lot to Shane”  
“Thank you for inviting me to stay” Nicky replied.  
“Oh don’t thank me. You’re welcome here any time”  
“It’s been great, seeing where Shane grew up and meeting his friends”  
“Did you like them? Or more importantly, did you pass the friend test?”  
“They were okay… I think they liked me okay too… Of course, they don’t know about… Well you know…”  
“Have you told your parents yet?” Nicky shook his head.   
“I… I’ve been wanting to but…” Nicky admitted. “It’s not exactly an easy conversation to have. In a way, I envy the way you found out”  
“Sometimes I worry that, had I not found out the way I did, Shane still wouldn’t have told me yet”  
“Maybe he would have? I mean, your family seems much closer than mine… He’s an only child, maybe he finds it easier to talk to you”

The microwave stopped so Mae stood up. She retrieved the popcorn from inside then indicated for Nicky to follow her into the Living room. The blonde followed and, once inside, immediately walked over to the window. It was barely three o’clock and the sky was nearly black.

“Looks like a nasty storm’s coming” Nicky stated. Mae walked over and peered out.  
“Yes, looks like” she agreed.  
Mae pulled the curtain closed then deposited the bowl of popcorn onto the coffee table. She walked over to the fireplace and lit the kindling. Nicky watched as it sparked and a warm fire filled the grate. The blonde was drawn to the flames and stood before it.  
“You really don’t like the cold, do you?” Mae asked him.  
“I usually don’t care either way” Nicky replied. “But it does seem really cold this weekend”  
Nicky nodded as Mae walked away. She walked over to a cabinet and began to search through the DVD titles.

Shane pushed open the Living room door and was greeted with the smell of popcorn and a warm fire. The image of Nicky standing before the fireplace was very appealing too. He pushed the door closed and walked over to the blonde. Shane stopped beside him, warming himself by the fire.  
Nicky reached out and took hold of his hand. Shane smiled at the blonde. 

“Ah, Shane” Mae greeted her son. “What movie should we watch?”  
With the curtain closed, the only light in the room was coming from the fireplace so the brunette hadn’t seen his mother hiding in the corner. He, instinctively, took a step away from Nicky. The older boy was having none of it and wrapped his arm around him, pulling Shane back towards him.

“Uh, movie?” Shane began.  
“Yeah” Mae replied. “Remember, upstairs? You asked if I wanted to watch a movie”  
“Oh, right… Yeah, sorry… I forgot”  
“How about this one?” 

She held up the DVD but Nicky couldn’t make out the cover. Shane nodded his head.  
“Perfect” he agreed. He then turned to Nicky. “Hope you like scary movies”  
“A scary movie?” Nicky asked.  
“It’s one of mam’s favourites”  
“I… Uh I’m not really a fan…”  
The brunette slipped his hand into Nicky’s.  
“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you” he assured the older boy. Mae held back a laugh.

Shane’s mother turned the TV on and slid the DVD into the player. She then walked over to the armchair and sat down, leaving the couch free for the two lads. Shane sank down into the cushions then looked up at Nicky.  
The blonde wasn’t sure if that was such a good idea so he walked over and sat down on the floor in front of the couch, closer to the popcorn. About ten minutes into the movie, Shane joined him on the floor.

During the movie, the younger boy passed the popcorn back and forth between his mother and Nicky. The storm hit about half way through the film, causing Nicky to jump and Shane to laugh. The rain began to pour down, so loud that it almost drowned out the sound of the television. It only lasted a few minutes before easing into a steady but constant drizzle.  
The three of them turned their attention back to the movie. Nicky was partially hopeful that the storm would knock out the power so he wouldn’t have to keep watching it.  
As the movie neared the end and the tension began to build, Shane glanced at his mother and she gave him the nod. 

Shane had seen this movie more times than he could count and he knew the exact moment to strike. In fact, he and his mother had been playing this joke on every person they had watched the movie with. He looked at Nicky and saw the way the blonde was leaning towards the screen, flinching in fear but unable to look away.   
Shane’s timing was perfect as he grabbed Nicky’s shoulder. The blonde yelped and found his heart beating in his throat. He rounded on Shane but the younger boy was laughing so hard that he couldn’t actually hear what Nicky was saying to him.

Mae was laughing too, discreetly, so Nicky wouldn’t know.  
Shane was now trying to apologize to the older boy but Nicky was standing his ground. He refused to look at Shane and folded his arms across his chest.

“Come on, Nix” Shane said. “I’m sorry, okay? But it’s tradition… We do it to everyone”  
Nicky pouted his lips but still refused to acknowledge that Shane was speaking to him.  
“Please?” Shane whispered. “Please, forgive me? I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have scared you… It wasn’t funny and I’m sorry I laughed at you”  
Shane reached up and placed his hand on Nicky’s cheek, turning the blonde’s head and forcing him to look at him.  
“I’m sorry” Shane insisted, staring into Nicky’s eyes.  
“Well you should be” Nicky replied.  
“Forgive me?”  
“Why should I?”  
“Because…” Shane whispered. “I love you”  
“Okay” Nicky replied, falling victim to Shane’s pleading eyes. “You’re forgiven”  
Shane smiled with relief then kissed Nicky.

Mae had been watching their whispered exchange and smiled when they sealed the apology with a kiss. She turned away when they leaned in for a second kiss. She knew from the way they looked at each other how they both felt but it was an unusual sight, seeing one’s son kissing another lad.  
Shane’s mother cleared her throat, her attention now focused on the DVD. The couple ceased their actions but Shane couldn’t resist holding Nicky’s hand for the remainder of the movie.

When it was over, Mae left to see if her husband was feeling better and they both came downstairs a few minutes later. Nicky didn’t want to say anything but Shane’s father really didn’t look well. He wouldn’t quite meet Nicky’s eye and the blonde wasn’t sure why.  
Mae went into the kitchen to begin cooking dinner while Peter disappeared into the Study. Shane looked at Nicky, wondering what the two of them could do to pass the time.

Peter emerged from the Study a moment later, carrying a large box.  
“Dad?” Shane asked. “What are you doing with grandad’s chess set?”  
“I thought you might like a game” Peter replied.  
“Really? We… We haven’t played for years”  
“I know”

“Oh Peter” Mae spoke up. “That could take hours” she turned to Nicky. “When they get started, there’s no stopping them”  
“Maybe I could help you in the Kitchen?” Nicky suggested. “I enjoy playing chess but not really watching”

Peter set up the pieces on the Dining room table and Shane sat down opposite him. Nicky smiled and wished him luck before following Mae into the Kitchen.  
“Could they really be there for hours?” Nicky asked her.  
“Sweetheart, if we don’t intervene at some point, they could be there for days” 

**--**

Shane awoke with a feeling of regret. Not a large, consuming one but a small niggling feeling. It was now Sunday morning. The morning of Nicky’s last full day in Sligo and they hadn’t managed a single moment alone the previous night. Shane’s father had kept him at the chessboard right up until dinner. The four of them sat down to a nice meal and a bottle of wine.  
After dinner, Peter had pulled out another board game; Monopoly. Nicky had grinned like a little kid and declared himself reigning champion. Knowing there was no way out now, Shane had been forced to play too.

It had proven to be a fun night. Shane couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a fun night in with his parents and he knew he would remember it for a long time to come. So he didn’t regret staying in and playing board games.  
No, his main regret was the valuable time it had taken from his remaining time with Nicky. The blonde was leaving tomorrow and, for the second night in row, they’d climbed into bed too exhausted for anything more than a few kisses.

Shane stifled a yawn and climbed out of bed. It was Nicky’s last full day with him and he wanted to make the most of it. Shane got dressed, went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth then slipped through the door into Nicky’s room. The blonde was still fast asleep.  
He tiptoed over to the bed and knelt down beside it. Suddenly overcome by the desire to re-enact a scene from one of his favourite fairytales, Shane leaned down and kissed Nicky’s lips.

The blonde blinked and opened his eyes. He smiled up at Shane, too sleepy to be startled by such an early morning assault. Nicky slid his hand behind Shane’s neck and pulled him down for another, more eager, kiss.

“You’ve already brushed your teeth” Nicky stated.  
“Good morning to you too” Shane replied.  
“Morning” Nicky smiled.  
“Come on, get up”  
“But it’s still early”  
“I know and today’s our last day together, I want to make the most of it”  
“Then get in”

Nicky made to pull Shane under the duvet but the brunette held his ground, freeing his hand from Nicky’s grasp.  
“There’ll be time for that later” Shane insisted.  
“You promise?”Nicky asked. “Because we lucked out last night”  
“Yeah, sorry about that… Dad was in a weird mood”  
“Maybe it’s finally hit him that you’re leaving for college soon and he wants to spend quality time with you before you go?”  
“Yeah, maybe… Now come on, get up!”

Shane grabbed the duvet and pulled it clear off the bed. Nicky was dressed in nothing but his boxers. Shane couldn’t help admiring the near-naked body on the bed.  
“Geez Nix” He said. “No wonder you’re complaining of being cold”  
“Shut up!” Nicky shot back. “I usually sleep naked so I don’t really have any pyjamas, okay?”  
“You sleep naked?”  
“I like to feel free when I sleep. And it makes it easier when jacking off in bed”  
“You touch yourself when you’re in bed?”  
“Only when I’m on the phone to you… Hearing your voice just makes me-”  
“Okay, enough of that… Get up”

Nicky sighed.  
“Why are you so insistent?” Nicky asked him.  
“I’ve got the whole day planned out and I don’t want to get behind schedule”  
“You have a schedule?”  
“Yes and first stop is breakfast”  
“What? Walking downstairs?”  
“No” Shane laughed. “We’re going out. Kian’s parents own a café in town and they do a mean breakfast. I didn’t know mam was going to spoil you while you were here but you should still try this one… Please? For me?”  
Nicky sighed again.  
“Okay… I’ll get up and get dressed”

Nicky reluctantly climbed off the bed and walked over to his bag. Shane jumped onto the bed and propped himself up with the pillows, looking at Nicky.  
“What? You’re going to watch me get dressed?” Nicky asked him.  
“Well, if I don’t then what’s to stop you from crawling back into bed?”  
“I don’t know… Because the bed does look so much more appealing now…”

The blonde moved back towards the bed and climbed on top Shane. He threw one leg over the younger boy, straddling him. Shane placed his hands on Nicky’s thighs and started to gently stroke them.  
This action had a desirable effect on Nicky’s groin and Shane smiled as Nicky junior stood to attention. 

“Now remember, you said you had a schedule for today” Nicky teased as he slid his hand into the waistband of his boxers and gently lowered them.  
“You locked the door, yeah?” Shane asked him.  
“Of course” Nicky replied as he slid closer to Shane’s lips.

*

Shane’s schedule ended up with several adjustments before they’d even left the bedroom. They were more than an hour behind by the time Nicky had dressed, Shane had brushed his teeth again and they had driven to the café. Luckily it was still breakfast time and they had no trouble getting a table.

Kian served them and gave them free refills on their tea or coffee. When he came to charge them, he sneaked them a discount and said his final farewells to Nicky. He told the older boy to come back and visit again soon which Nicky promised to do.

The next stop was a visit to one of Kian’s cousin’s. His uncle owned a stable and raised horses that he let Shane ride whenever he wanted. Nicky had ridden several times in his life but wasn’t as experienced as Shane.  
They rode for a few hours, Shane showing Nicky many secluded places that he often sneaked away to when he wanted to write. When they reached Shane’s favourite spot, Nicky returned the favour Shane had done him that morning and they’d continued on with sneaky grins on their faces.

By the time they returned the horses, it was nearly three o’clock and they hadn’t stopped for lunch yet. Shane knew his mother was planning a special dinner that night and he didn’t want to ruin Nicky’s appetite so he drove to the main street and they went into McDonalds. The older boy found it amusing that a small town like Sligo had its own McDonalds restaurant.

With their food in hand, Shane walked Nicky several blocks to his old high school. The grounds were deserted but Shane only wanted to show Nicky the bleachers overlooking the football field. He took Nicky to the uppermost bench and they sat down with their meals. The next few minutes passed quickly as they ate in silence. Once they’d finished, they moved closer together to conserve body heat.

“What are we doing up here?” Nicky asked Shane.  
“This is where I wrote my first poem” Shane replied. “And down there,” he pointed directly below. “That was where I got beat up for it”  
“Oh, Shay”  
“It was the first game of the season and I didn’t want to go but my friends made me” Shane explained. “During the game, I got bored and started to write. Some of the older lads saw me and when I got up during the game, they cornered me. One grabbed my notebook and read out what I’d written… They pushed me under the bleachers and started punching and kicking me”  
“What happened next?”  
“Wallace stopped them… He was a year ahead of us at school and he knew the jerks who were beating me up. He made them stop”  
“And that’s why you still let him tease you? Because you’re grateful to him for what he did for you all those years ago”  
“Pretty much… Yeah”

Nicky reached down and entwined his fingers with Shane’s. He was learning so much about the younger boy. It was nice to see this side of him; even if it wasn’t one of the moments he was proud of. Nicky felt touched at how much Shane was opening up to him. With each new fact he learned, he realized he was growing to love Shane even more.

They stayed up on the bleachers for a long time, neither one willing to move just yet. Shane remembering the years he’d spent at this school, Nicky contemplating the story the younger boy had just shared with him. When he looked down, he could almost picture the kids beating Shane up and he longed to take the brunette into his arms and kiss the memory away.

“Those kids beat me up for writing a poem” Shane stated, staring off into the distance. “What do you think they would have done if they knew I was gay?”  
Nicky didn’t know how to answer him.

“Come on” Shane said, standing up. He picked up the food wrappers. “It’s getting cold”  
“Looks like that storm is coming back” Nicky stated as he looked up at the sky.  
Shane agreed with him and decided to head home before it could catch them. They left the bleachers and returned to Shane’s car.  
Once inside, Nicky quickly looked around but the car park was deserted. He leaned over and kissed Shane.

“I wanted to do that up on the bleachers” Nicky admitted. “But I thought someone might see us”  
“I wanted to do that too” Shane replied.  
“Thank you, Shay” Nicky said. “For taking me to see a side of you that very few people know”  
“There’s already a side of me that *only* you get to see” Shane told him. “But thank you for coming along for the ride. I… I wasn’t sure if you might find it lame or boring”  
“Shane, you opened yourself up to me in a way I didn’t expect you to. There’s nothing lame or boring about that at all” Shane smiled at Nicky’s sincere words. “If anything, my love and admiration for you has grown, more than I ever thought it could… Just when I thought it wasn’t possible for me to love you any more than I already did”  
Shane leaned in and kissed Nicky.  
“I feel the same way” Shane admitted. “Because you didn’t run away or laugh at me or… Or roll your eyes with boredom. I let you see into my soul and you didn’t hate what you saw”  
“Never, I could never hate anything that makes you, you”  
“I love you” Shane whispered in Nicky’s ear.  
“Me too” Nicky replied.

*

The next few hours flew by and before he knew it, Shane was sitting at the dinner table with Nicky and his parents for the last time. His father wasn’t acting as strange as the day before but something was still off with him.  
Shane’s mother had really gone all out to make Nicky’s last meal with them a special one. They ate and ate and talked and laughed around the table. Desert was just as tasty as dinner and before long, they were all sipping their last cups of tea.

Shane was the first to retire for the night. Nicky heard the shower running while he enjoyed a game of cards with Shane’s father. Mae was cleaning up and talking to Nicky while he lost each hand to Peter.  
After giving in to defeat, he bid the Filan’s goodnight and made his way upstairs. He went into the bathroom and showered before joining Shane in his bed.

It was their last night together and they were going to make the most of it. Shane didn’t want to waste another second of it. He and Nicky lay side by side, staring into each others eyes and exchanging gentle kisses.  
“Shay?” Nicky whispered. “What were you talking about yesterday? That… Thing you wanted to try but were worried I’d say no to?”  
“I… I saw this video where… Where…,” he nervously licked his lips.   
“What? You can say it…”  
“Instead of using his fingers… The lad used his tongue to…”  
“Shane,” Nicky cut him off with a kiss. “Do you want to do it or have me do it to you?”  
“What do you mean?”

Nicky gave him another deep kiss before staring into his eyes.  
“I want tonight to be special” Nicky said. “I… I want you to… Do me”  
“You… You want me to… To…?” Shane stammered.  
“If you want to”  
“No… I mean, yes… I mean, of course I want to… But, are you sure?”  
“Yes. I want to know what it feels like… Having you inside me… And if you want to… To use your tongue…”

Shane leaned in and kissed Nicky. His heart began to pound in his chest. He’d never experienced this before, someone trusting him enough to allow him to penetrate them. He’d let Nicky in plenty of times and now the blonde was willing to return the favour.

“Now?” Shane asked him. Nicky nodded his head. “It’s okay to be scared. It’s your first time but I promise I’ll take care of you”  
“I know you will” Nicky replied. “I trust you”

The brunette smiled and gently ran his hand down Nicky’s back. The older boy shuddered and rolled onto his stomach. Shane shifted his position and began to place a trail of kisses down Nicky’s spine to his ass. Once there, Shane started to massage his cheeks, attempting to relax the blonde. It appeared to work and Shane nervously moved forward. Not only was this his first time exploring his lover’s crevice but he was going all in. He parted Nicky’s cheeks and slowly moved towards him.

Nicky’s eyes were closed and the feeling of unease was growing increasingly stronger. He told himself it would be okay; he trusted Shane and knew the brunette would never intentionally hurt him. The moment Shane’s tongue breached him; Nicky buried his face in the pillow to hold back a groan.  
It was like nothing he’d ever experienced before and he curled his hands into fists. Shane’s tongue was like… Like something he couldn’t even begin to describe. He wanted to say something, to urge him on but was too scared to make any noise for fear of scaring him off.

After several intense minutes, Shane’s actions ceased. Nicky reluctantly lifted his head, still able to see stars.  
“Are you okay?” Shane whispered with a hint of fear in his voice.  
“God Shay” Nicky panted. “That was amazing… I… I think I came”  
The sheets beneath him were all sticky but Nicky wasn’t embarrassed at coming so soon. Shane had managed to drive him wild with what appeared to be very little effort.

Moving away from the sticky spot on the sheet, Nicky rolled onto his back and looked up at Shane. His eyes were saying ‘fuck me, now!’ Shane was about to kiss Nicky but he stopped, unsure if Nicky would want a kiss from him, given where his tongue had just been.  
The blonde handed him some lube and Shane coated his finger. Nicky opened a condom and had it ready. The brunette worked his slick finger in and out a few times then added a second. Nicky was very tight and Shane was eager to know what that would feel like around his cock.

Nicky slipped the condom onto Shane’s cock then braced himself for what was to come. Shane slid his arm around Nicky then positioned himself at Nicky’s entrance.  
They stared into each other’s eyes until the blonde covered the gap and kissed Shane. It was all the encouragement Shane needed and he pushed his cock inside the older boy.  
The blonde bit his lip, wincing at the unnatural intrusion. He grabbed Shane’s hand and squeezed it. The younger boy leaned over him whispering encouragingly in his ear, telling him it would be okay. It took a moment for Nicky to adjust and he started panting. Shane’s cock was inside him and, despite the mild pain, it felt incredible.

“Shay” Nicky whispered.  
“Love you” Shane replied.  
“It feels… Weird”  
“I know”

The younger boy slowly started to move, thrusting his hips and pushing himself in further. Nicky groaned and bit his lip. His breathing became more rapid as Shane thrust in and out of him. He reached up and touched Shane’s cheek, the tender display of affection sent shivers down Shane’s spine.

“I love you” Shane said again.

The door to Shane’s room burst open and the light came on, bathing the couple in light and almost blinding them.   
“NO!” Peter shouted. ”No, I will not…”  
“Peter, calm down” Mae’s voice floated in from the hall.

The two lads were frozen in place, like a deer caught in headlights. Shane’s instincts were telling him to hold on to Nicky and not let him go. The silhouette of his father in the doorway of his bedroom was a terrifying one. Shane started to reach for the duvet, his brain finally registering that both he and Nicky were naked.

Peter marched into the room, a look of pure hatred and disgust on his face.  
“Dad-“ Shane tried to say but his voice was failing him.  
His father looked at him and Shane feared Peter wasn’t really seeing him. Nicky was too terrified to be embarrassed of the position they’d been caught in. His instincts were telling him to protect Shane.

Peter reached out and grabbed Nicky’s wrist. He wrenched the blonde off the bed, pulling him clear away from Shane.  
“Dad!” Shane shouted.  
“Peter, stop!” Mae called.

“I will not have this… This evil in my house!” Peter declared.  
“Evil?” Shane almost laughed. “Dad-”  
“You… You perverted my son and I won’t have you in my house. Take your sick, twisted ways elsewhere”  
“Peter, please?” Mae begged. “Stop this, now!”

“Did you not see what they were doing?” Peter rounded on her. “Yesterday, I came home to find him in this very room, molesting our son”

“He didn’t molest me!” Shane insisted.

The entire situation could have been funny if it wasn’t so sick. Shane was standing, completely naked before his father. His mother was by the door, seemingly unsure of what to do. Peter stood his ground, holding himself to his full height; his hand was still firmly locked on Nicky’s wrist. The blonde was kneeling on the floor, somewhat unsure if he should attempt to break free of Peter’s grasp.

“We welcomed you into our house” Peter said. “Treated you like a member of the family and this is how you repay us? By forcing yourself upon our son?”  
“Peter,” Mae said. “Now, be reasonable”

She walked into the room and reached for her husband’s hand. She then pried his fingers off Nicky’s wrist and held onto Peter’s arm. She tried to get him to look at her but he was transfixed.  
Now free of Peter’s hold, Nicky took a few steps back. He moved towards the bed and Shane came to his side. The brunette wrapped his arms around Nicky which only infuriated his father further.

“Stop it!” Peter growled. “You stay away from my son!”

Mae stood in front of her husband, not allowing him to take another step. It was her turn to stand firm, between her husband and her son. Nicky picked up his jeans and pulled them on, finding mild comfort in knowing he was no longer completely nude before Shane’s parents.  
Shane wasn’t as self conscious. He turned and looked at his father, a look of anger and hurt on his face.

“No” Shane shouted. “He will not stay away from me! Nicky is welcome in this house, mam said so herself”  
“That was before we knew the truth… That he’s a deviant. He’s sick and he’s trying to turn you into something that’s not natural”  
“He hasn’t tried to do anything like that”  
“I saw the two of you, yesterday, and his hands were all over you…”

Shane turned and looked at Nicky. The blonde held onto his hand, offering him silent support. The sight of them holding hands was enough to set Peter off again. Mae remained strong, once again, maintaining her place between her husband and her son. She loved her husband dearly but there was no way she was going to let him hurt her son.

“Yeah” Shane agreed. He took a step closer to his father. “His hands *were* all over me” Shane said, his eyes never leaving his father’s. “And his cock was buried in my ass” the brunette continued. “So far in that it almost hurt… And I loved it. I loved every second of it”  
“Shane, please?” Mae begged. She didn’t want him to goad his father.  
Nicky closed his eyes, not wanting to watch how this was going to play out.  
“I’ve had his cock in my mouth too and it feels so good. I love when he touches me and when he fucks me… When he makes me come, come so hard that I’m practically screaming because it feels so damned good”

“Stop it” Peter insisted. “Stop this… You’re not like this. You’re not like him!”  
“I am!” Shane shouted. “I’m gay! Dad, I have been my whole life. You think he ‘turned’ me well you’re wrong. I came on to him, if anything I made him gay!”  
“No”  
“Yes! I love him, dad. Can’t you see that? I’m in love with Nicky. And I’m going to be with him”  
“You will not be with him. You will never see him again”  
Peter looked up at Nicky. The look on his face broke Nicky’s heart. He couldn’t believe the man standing before him was the same one he’d been playing cards with not even an hour ago.  
“I want you out of my house, now!” Peter said. “And if I ever see you near my son again, I will cut your dick and balls off”  
“Peter!” Mae shouted.

Hearing his father threaten Nicky was the final straw for Shane. Yes, he’d been baiting his dad before but he’d been trying to make a point. That had failed to work and the brunette didn’t know what to do next. He wished his mother would try harder to make him see reason.  
Shane looked at Nicky and knew there was no easy way out of this situation. He was right where he’d never wanted to be… And he was naked too.

Shane walked over to Nicky, pulled the blonde into his arms and kissed him. This got the right reaction from his father. Peter pushed Mae aside and moved towards his son. Shane steeled his resolve and turned to face his father.

“I guess now’s the best time to tell you I’m not going to College in London” Shane said. “I got accepted at UCD and that’s where I’m going. I’m moving to Dublin to be with Nicky”  
“No, you’re not” Peter said.  
“He is” Mae said. “Shane’s going to UCD, Peter. It’s his choice to make and he’d made it”

Peter was outraged. He looked up and saw the encouraging smile Nicky was flashing at Shane. The older man snapped. He grabbed Nicky’s wrist and started to drag him towards the door.  
Shane looked at his mother for help. His father had clearly lost his mind. He was acting so much worse than Shane had ever imagined. He ran after them and managed to manoeuvre himself in between Nicky and his father. Peter turned, angered by Shane’s interference. He released Nicky, raised his fist and backhanded his son.

Nicky gasped and hugged Shane. Mae ran over and blocked his path one more time.  
“Stop this, stop this now!” She begged. “Please, it’s gone far enough”  
“I won’t stop, not until he’s out of my house” Peter insisted.  
“But it’s pouring with rain, this storm? It’s dangerous out there”

“It’s okay, mam” Shane spoke up. “We’re going”  
“Shane, no” Nicky replied.  
“Yes”  
Shane took Nicky’s hand in his then turned to look at his parents.  
“Dad, if you say Nicky isn’t welcome here anymore than neither am I” Shane said. “Because I won’t stay anywhere that Nicky’s can’t”

His lover took the hint and moved towards the door. He slipped though the bathroom and into his room. Nicky picked up his bag. He opened it and pulled out a shirt which he pulled on. The blonde then turned and made his way back to Shane’s room. The younger boy was finally getting dressed.

“Shane, sweetheart, please?” Mae begged.  
“I’m sorry, mam” Shane said.

He walked over to Nicky and wrapped his arm around his waist.  
“Shane, you can’t leave like this” Nicky said to him.  
“He’s right” Peter said. “If you walk out that door with him, it’s the end. You won’t be welcome here anymore either”  
“Peter!”  
“Don’t fight me on this, Mae. You know I’m right”  
“Goodbye Mam” Shane said.

He followed Nicky through the bathroom and into the spare room. From there they stepped out into the hall then made their way down the stairs. Mae came after them, with tears in her eyes, she begged her son to stay.  
“I’m sorry, mam” Shane said, tears forming in his own eyes. “You know I have to go”  
She reluctantly nodded her head in understanding.  
“I can’t stay here, neither of us can… Not while he’s like this” Shane said. “Please, you have to make him see sense”   
“I’ll do everything I can to talk him around, I promise”  
“I know you will”

Shane hugged her then she reached for Nicky and pulled him into a hug.  
“I don’t blame you for this” She said to Nicky. “None of this is your fault, Nicky. I need you to know that”  
Nicky nodded his head and returned her embrace.  
Shane opened the front door and went outside. Nicky followed then handed him the keys to his car. They hurried through the rain to Nicky’s car, Shane unlocked it and they climbed in. The brunette started the ignition and backed down the drive. He looked back and could see his mother on the front porch.

Shane pulled onto the road and drove down the street. They travelled in silence for a few minutes until Shane pulled the car off the road and stopped. His hands were shaking and he collapsed in a fit of unstoppable tears. Nicky reached over and wrapped his arms around Shane.  
“Its okay, Shay” Nicky whispered. “It’s all going to be okay”  
“No, it’s not” Shane sobbed.  
“You’re right” Nicky agreed. It had been too awful an experience for Nicky to lie about it now. “It’s shit… It’s all turned to shit”  
“I still have you” Shane cried.  
“Yeah” Nicky kissed Shane’s forehead. “You’ll always have me. I promise”

**--**

Nicky didn’t attempt to offer any more words of encouragement or reassurance to Shane. Instead, he kept quiet and simply held the brunette in his arms while Shane cried. Tears of pain, anger, humiliation and determination all mingled together to form a torrential emotional outpour. They remained in the car, by the side of the road for near an hour; not once in that time did Nicky try to stop Shane’s tears. He knew the younger boy needed to get them all out now and he was willing to wait.

As the rain began to increase outside, Shane tears started to subside. The tears became silent sobs before slowly stopping altogether. The brunette was exhausted; both emotionally and physically. He finally looked to Nicky for a sign of reassurance which the blonde eagerly offered him.  
As he reached for Nicky’s hand, the blonde winced in pain and Shane pulled away in shock.

“Nicky? What’s wrong?” He asked him.  
“It’s nothing” Nicky replied. Shane saw him gently rubbing his wrist.  
“Are you hurt?”  
“I’m sure it’s just a sprain… I’ve hurt this wrist plenty of times before”  
“Why didn’t you say something sooner?”  
“It’s no big deal” Nicky shrugged.  
“Nix, my father hurt you” Shane stated.  
“Don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine”

Nicky reached over with his other hand and gently stroked Shane’s cheek.  
“He got you pretty good too” Nicky stated.  
“I don’t care” Shane replied, more concerned for Nicky’s well-being than his own.  
“Yeah, you do” Nicky said. Shane nodded his head, blinking back more tears that were threatening to fall.

“Come on, we can’t stay here all night” Shane said.  
He started the car and pulled back onto the road. When Nicky asked where they were going, Shane didn’t answer. They drove for about fifteen minutes until Shane pulled into a driveway. It was so dark and wet outside that Nicky hadn’t even noticed the house in front of them.  
Shane switched the ignition off and removed the keys. He then turned and looked at Nicky.

“Want to know the advantage of living in a small town?” Shane asked him.  
“What’s that?” Nicky asked.  
“Close connections to the local doctor”  
“Shay, I don’t need a doctor”  
“Yes, you do”

Shane climbed out of the car and hurried up the front walk. Once there, he waited for Nicky to join him. It took the blonde some time to open the door and approach Shane. They stood on the porch, looking at the falling rain. The weather seemed to want to match their mood and situation. Shane knocked on the front door.

“I do have to warn you about something” Shane said to Nicky. “But it’ll be okay. I wouldn’t have brought you here unless I thought it necessary”  
The porch light came on and the front door opened.

“Hi Samantha” Shane greeted his ex-girlfriend. “Is your mam home?”  
While she was excited to see Shane and the stranger she’d met at the grocery store, she knew something was very wrong. Samantha stepped aside and immediately ushered them inside.  
“She’s upstairs” Samantha replied.  
“I… We really need to see her. Please? It’s important”  
She wanted to ask more questions but it was obvious that Shane wasn’t in a talkative mood. “Why don’t you go through to the back room and I’ll go get her?”  
“Thank you”

Nicky nodded his thanks to the young woman then followed Shane. They made their way through the family home and Shane opened the door to the workroom. He switched the light on and pushed the door closed. Once inside, Shane led Nicky over to the examination table and told him to sit down. The blonde was reluctant but did as Shane instructed.  
He sat on the table, Shane standing before him. The brunette leaned closer and placed his hands on Nicky’s neck, urging the older boy to look at him.

“I am so, so sorry, Nicky” Shane whispered.  
“Shane, this isn’t your fault” Nicky replied. He leaned forward and leaned his forehead against Shane’s.  
“I never meant for any of this to happen”  
“I know… Neither did I”

*

Samantha hurried upstairs and found her mother.  
“Who was at the door?” she asked. “Dreadful weather to be out in”  
“It’s Shane” Samantha replied. “He’s downstairs with a friend… I think something’s really wrong”  
“Sammy, is someone hurt?”  
“I don’t know. He just asked to see you… Said it was important. I sent them into the surgery”  
“I’d better find out what’s going on”

*

Shane had just moved away from Nicky when the door opened and Dr. Bennett entered the room.  
“Hi Dr. Bennett” Shane greeted her. He walked over and shook her hand.  
“Shane,” she replied. “I’m a little concerned… What brings you here on a night like this?”  
“Uh, this is Nicky” Shane walked her over to the blonde. Nicky held out his hand. She shook it. “He’s a friend of mine from Dublin…” 

“It’s nice to meet you, Nicky” Dr. Bennett nodded her head.  
“He’s hurt his wrist” Shane stated.  
“I’m sure it’s just a sprain. I do it all the time” Nicky explained. “Soccer’s my passion so I’m always getting hurt”

She reached for his arm and began to examine it.  
“Is that how you did it this time?” She asked. The doctor hadn’t failed to notice the bruise starting to form under Shane’s eye.  
“No,” Shane admitted.  
Nicky looked up at him, Shane held his gaze.  
“It was an accident” Nicky stated.

“Maybe so,” Shane said. “But the intent was there”  
He moved towards Nicky and stopped just next to him, not wanting to get in the way of the doctor’s examination.  
“Shane,” Nicky began.  
“No, it’s okay, Nix. I’ve known Dr Bennett my whole life…” he smiled sadly at her. “My father did this to him”

“What?” She gasped. “But… You said it was an accident, right?”  
“No, it wasn’t” Shane admitted. He couldn’t bring himself to look at her while he spoke. Shane focused on Nicky instead. “My father found us in bed together and forcefully separated us”  
“Oh Shane”  
“I don’t think he meant to physically hurt me” Nicky spoke up. “He just… Wanted to keep me away from his son”

Shane reached out and grabbed hold of Nicky’s good arm. The blonde lifted it to his lips and kissed the palm. Shane was fighting back tears.  
“Is that how you got your black eye?” Dr Bennett asked Shane.  
“Yeah” Nicky answered for him. “Mr. Filan grabbed me again and Shane tried to stop him…”  
“So he slapped me” Shane finished.

Dr. Bennett forced herself to hold back. She couldn’t believe that Peter would do that to his only son; she’d known the Filan’s most of her life, had even been at their wedding. She didn’t want to believe what Shane was telling her yet the injuries matched the story… Yet Shane was Peter’s only son and, she could imagine that, finding his son in bed with another lad would be devastating for him.

“Mam tried to stop him, to make him see sense but he just won’t listen” Shane said, more to himself than anyone else. “No matter what she or I tried to say to him. He just won’t listen”  
Nicky released Shane’s hand and placed his hand on the brunette’s neck.  
“It’s over now, Shay” Nicky said to him. “He’ll calm down, eventually, once your mother’s talked to him”  
Shane nodded his head but didn’t really believe Nicky. It was nice to be hopeful though. He placed his hand over Nicky’s, drawing comfort from the blonde’s touch.

“You were right, just a mild sprain” Dr Bennett said to Nicky. She was now wrapping his arm with a bandage. “What will you do now?”  
“It’s getting late” Shane said. “So we’ll have to get going”  
“Going where?” Both Nicky and Dr. Bennett spoke in unison.  
“We’ll head a few miles out of town” Shane said, still holding Nicky’s hand to his cheek. “There’s a lot of B & B’s around, we can stay the night then, in the morning, while my parents are at work, I’ll go home and pick up my stuff”

“Oh no” The doctor said to him. “If you think I’m letting you out in this weather…”  
“Dr Bennett-” Shane started to argue.   
“No, you’re not paying to stay in a B&B, and you’re not driving in this storm. The two of you will stay here”  
“Wow, that’s really nice of you” Nicky spoke up. “And, of course, I’ll pay you for this” he pointed to his arm.  
“I’m not taking your money, Nicky” she said to him. “And think nothing of it. I’m insisting on this. Neither one of you is to leave my house tonight, understood?”

Nicky and Shane exchanged a look then the younger boy nodded.  
“Good, that’s settled” She smiled then walked over to the door. She slipped out and pulled the door closed. Her daughter came hurrying up to her.

“Sammy, can you go upstairs and get the guest room ready?” She asked her.  
“Mam, what’s going on?” Samantha asked. “What’s wrong with Shane?”  
“Please, just go upstairs and prepare the guest room”  
Samantha pouted and narrowed her eyes at her mother but she quickly relented and left the room.

Dr. Bennett turned and pushed the door open again. Nicky was still sitting on the exam table; Shane was standing in front of him. The blonde had his arms around Shane and they were deep in conversation.  
“I never thought he would do something like that” Shane was saying.  
“I know” Nicky replied.  
“And I’m sorry, I’m sorry you got hurt”  
“Shay, please, stop apologizing. I told you, this isn’t your fault and I’m never going to blame you for any of this, okay?”  
“But-”  
“No, no more apologies. What happened, happened. But we’re okay, we’re in one piece and we’re together. That’s all that matter’s right now. I know you’re hurting, Shay, and it’s going to hurt for a while but we can’t do anything about that right now”  
Shane nodded his head still holding back more tears. 

Dr. Bennett was about to interrupt when she saw Nicky lean forward and kiss Shane. It was an unusual sight, seeing the young man who used to date her daughter, kissing another lad… But the way they were together, the way they looked at each other, it was clear that they each cared deeply for the other.

“I know it’s late” Dr. Bennett spoke up. “But I think you two could use a cup of tea”  
Shane sighed and smiled.   
“That sounds great, Dr. Bennett” he said to her.  
“Wonderful. I’ll put the kettle on, just come into the Kitchen when you’re ready”  
She backed out the door and pulled it closed, giving them a moment of privacy.

“She seems really cool” Nicky said to Shane.  
“She is” Shane replied as he helped the blonde down from the table. “The perfect mother-in-law?”  
“I told you I had to warn you about something…”  
“That she’s Samantha’s mother?”  
“Yeah… But I’ve known her my whole life… She’s really close with my parents. Mam was maid of honour at her wedding too”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah… When she divorced her husband, mam stayed with her through the whole thing and helped her… It was inevitable that Samantha and I would start dating… But, well, as you know, it didn’t work out”  
“For someone who’s so close to your parents, she seems pretty okay about you being gay”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders. “Well, I’m not her son”  
“But you did date her daughter…”  
“Yeah”

Nicky wrapped his arms around Shane and held him close for a moment.  
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to you” Nicky said. “But, I’m here for you, no matter what”  
“I know you are” Shane replied. “I love you”  
They shared one last kiss before separating and leaving the room. 

*

Shane led Nicky through the Bennett’s house and into the Kitchen. The sound of the storm was more obvious from here and Shane was relieved that he didn’t have to venture out in it again. Samantha was sitting at the table with her mother. A pot of tea was in front of them with four mugs and a plate of biscuits.  
The two lads walked forward and sat down in the two vacant chairs. Dr. Bennett picked up the pot and started pouring the contents into the mugs. She handed one mug to Shane and another to Nicky.

“Will someone please tell me what’s going on?” Samantha asked.  
She looked to her mother but the older woman didn’t say anything. The lights flickered overhead as a bolt of thunder echoed outside.  
“Were you lads in an accident or something?” She asked.  
Shane took a deep breath then bravely looked up. He stared at the girl he’d known his entire life, his former girlfriend. When he looked at her, he saw one of his friends, someone he hadn’t expected to be coming out to anytime soon… And yet here he was.

“No, not quite” Shane said.  
Samantha was looking at him with confusion and concern. In that moment, she wasn’t the girl who’d dumped him two days before the Deb. She wasn’t the girl who’d cheated on him while he lived in another city nor was she the girl who’d performed a slutty rendition of ‘Like a Virgin’… Right now, she was the girl he used to share ice-cream with, watch movies on a Sunday afternoon with and ride horses in the school holidays with.   
“I… Samantha…” Shane trailed off.  
“You remember when we met the other day?” Nicky spoke up,  
“Uh huh… At the grocery store”  
“Right, I told you I was here visiting a friend… That friend was Shane… He and I met last year when his family temporarily relocated to Dublin”  
“Okay”  
“Well, the thing is… Shane & I…”   
It was Nicky’s turn to trail off. He looked to the younger boy. It wasn’t his place to out Shane, but he could tell that the brunette wanted to tell her the truth.

“God, this is hard” Shane stated. “Samantha, do you remember what Nicky was buying when you met him?

“Yeah, he was buying… Oh” She smirked to herself and hoped her mother wasn’t looking at her. She picked up her cup of tea and noticed, for the first time, that Shane’s hand resting on the table… and it was holding onto Nicky’s. She looked up and her eyes roamed from one to the other and back again.  
“Oh” she groaned.  
“Nicky and I… Are a couple” Shane managed to say. “We’ve only been together a month but… That’s long enough for me to know I’m in love with him”  
“Oh”  
“We’re here, now, because my father found out about us and tried to forcibly remove Nicky from our house. That’s how Nicky got hurt… I tried to stop it but my father hit me”  
“I’m sorry” Samantha whispered.  
“I had to make sure Nicky wasn’t badly hurt so we came here… But your mother won’t let us leave because we’ve got no where to go and it’s raining real bad out there”

“So you’re staying here tonight?” She asked. “The two of you, together, in one room”  
“Samantha” Dr. Bennett’s tone was firm.  
“What?” She snapped. “I just found out my ex-boyfriend is a fag and he’s spending the night in our house with his boyfriend”  
“Samantha! Apologize at once”  
“No, I won’t!”

On that note, she pushed her chair back and leapt to her feet. With her nose held up in the air, she stormed out of the room. Not once did she look back. Dr. Bennett was appalled at her daughter’s behaviour and attempted to apologize on her behalf.  
“No, its okay” Shane said. “She has every right to be upset… I should have told her the truth a long time ago”  
The tears he’d been fighting back started once more and Shane buried his face in his hands. Nicky immediately wrapped his arms around him and held him close. Dr. Bennett watched over them for a moment, Shane’s grief and upset was awful to watch and she wished she could do something to help him.

“I know your daughter is upset” Nicky said, looking at her. “If you’d like us to leave-”  
“No, definitely not. My daughter is… Well, she’s a bit like Shane’s father… Unreasonable and very stubborn”  
“We didn’t mean to cause so much trouble”  
“You’re not, you’re not causing me any trouble. You are guests in my home and can continue to be for as long as you want”  
“Thank you”

“I think I need to lie down” Shane spoke up.  
“Of course. You know where the spare room is?”  
Shane nodded his head then slowly pulled away from Nicky. He walked around the table and hugged Dr. Bennett.  
“Thank you for being so understanding” Shane said to her. Nicky also stood up.  
“Why don’t you head on up to bed too?” She said to Nicky. “You’ve both had a long night and I think sleep will do you some good”

Less than ten minutes later, the two of them were lying side by side in a double bed. The room was dark and they couldn’t make out each other’s faces despite facing each other. Nicky reached out and placed his hand on Shane’s waist.

“I wish things had turned out differently” Nicky whispered to him.  
“This wasn’t how I pictured our last night together either” Shane admitted.  
“It was going so well too… Up until… ”  
“I still can’t believe he walked in right when we were in the middle of…”  
“I know… But what was he saying about yesterday? Seeing us together and… Me molesting you?”  
“He must have come home before going to lunch and looked into my room…”  
“God, wonder what position we were in?”  
“How many did we try?”  
“How did we not see him?”  
“Maybe it was when you were on your back, on the bed and I was on top? You were playing with my dick, so’ your hands were all over me’ and your cock was up my ass”  
“You don’t have to be so crude, Shay…”  
“I know… Call it therapy, I guess”  
“Is it wrong for me to admit that I was getting a little turned on when you were telling your dad how much you love having my cock up your ass?”

“I was half expecting him to slap me for that” Shane confessed.  
“You were goading him, Shay” Nicky said.  
“I know it was wrong but I couldn’t help myself. I wanted him to know that I wasn’t ashamed of my feelings for you”  
“Well, maybe you should have just said that?”

Shane shifted his weight and moved closer to Nicky. It was weird being able to lay in bed with the blonde and not have to worry about being caught. Every so often, tears would form in his eyes, sometimes he’d let them come but other times, he’d stave them off. Right now he fought them back as he snuggled into Nicky’s embrace.  
Within minutes, they were both fast asleep.

**--**

Mae was fighting back tears of her own for most of the night. She was devastated that her son had walked out the way he had but, in a way, she understood why he’d done what he did. She was upset at her husband too for the way he’d reacted.   
She had tried her best to keep him from finding out the truth about Shane’s relationship with Nicky and she knew they had been careful about it too.

It was nearly two hours after her son left that she was able to bring herself to address her husband. He had tried to talk to her right after Shane walked out but she had pushed him aside, gone into their bedroom and locked the door.  
She finally opened the door and made her way down the stairs. Peter was sitting in the Living room with an untouched glass of wine in his hand. He appeared to be staring at the dark contents of the glass, trying to decide if he should drink it or not.

“Why?” Mae spoke from the doorway.

Peter turned and looked at her. He put the glass aside and indicated for her to enter the room. She did so, walking over to the armchair and slowly sitting down.  
“Why did you do that?” She sobbed. “He’s our son”  
“Sweetheart, I know you’re mad at me” Peter explained to her.  
“Mad is an understatement”  
“I had to do it”  
“But why? Nicky was going home in the morning”  
“You don’t understand” Peter tried to explain. “I saw the two of them, in Shane’s room, and what they were doing was sick and perverted. That our son would let another man use his body like that… I thought we raised him properly”  
“We did” Mae insisted. “He’s a good lad. He’s always done everything he could to make you proud”  
“Well this… This isn’t something to be proud of! I… I tried to forget what I’d seen but I couldn’t. And yes, Nicky was meant to go home in the morning but once they’d both gone upstairs… I knew what they were going to do and I couldn’t let it happen… The thought of the two of them, having sex, in our house, right under our noses… I had to stop them”

Mae could see the look of pain on her husbands face.  
“But they’re in love” Mae whispered.  
“They’re young” Peter replied. “Shane’s just confused. There’s no love there, only perversion”  
“Peter-”  
“I don’t understand how you’re so accepting of this. Why can’t you see how wrong it is?”

“Because I knew Shane was gay” Mae confessed.  
“What?” Peter demanded.  
“I’ve known for some time… But my suspicions weren’t confirmed until after he met Nicky. The first time he brought Nicky home to meet us, alarm bells were ringing in my head. Then, as time went on and I got to know Nicky, I started to be okay with the idea. Nicky’s a sweet lad and he obviously cares a great deal for Shane…”  
“So you knew? You saw this happening and you didn’t try to stop it?”  
“To be honest, I’d hoped I was wrong. I thought they’d be friends and when we moved back here, Shane would forget all about him and move on with his life… But something happened and Shane decided he wasn’t going to the Deb. I tried to make him change his mind but nothing I said could convince him… Then, an hour before the Deb was due to start, Nicky turned up on our doorstep”  
“They went to the Deb together?”  
“They went with Nicky’s friends, in a large group… There was nothing but friendship between them at the time”  
“How do you know all this?”  
“Because Shane told me. He’d fallen in love with Nicky… He made the first move, he took a chance on something, someone, he believed in… And Nicky rejected him”  
“What?”  
“Shane was heartbroken. It broke my heart to see him so miserable. We had told him we were moving back here and he didn’t want to leave Nicky. That’s why he kissed him”

“No” Peter stood up. “I don’t want to hear any more of this”  
“Well you have to” Mae insisted.  
“No… It’s late and I have work tomorrow”  
“You can’t be thinking of going to work after all this”  
“All what? Our son abandoned us”  
“Because you forced him to”  
“I gave him a choice”  
“No, you didn’t! You pushed him away; you forced him to leave… By telling him that the one he loves isn’t welcome here”

Ring! Ring!  
Mae stared at the phone for a second then practically flew across the room, snatching it up in her hand.  
“Shane?” She asked, hopeful. “Oh, hi Trish”  
“I’m sorry to call so late Mae” Dr. Bennett greeted her.  
Peter took this opportunity to slip out the door and up the stairs.  
“It’s okay, I was still awake”  
“I thought you might be”  
“You did?”  
“Yes, the reason I’m calling you is… To tell you that, Shane’s okay”  
“He is? Oh thank the Lord. You’ve seen him? You’ve spoken to him?”  
“He turned up on my doorstep about an hour ago. His friend was hurt, he has a sprained wrist”  
“Oh Trish, thank you”  
“They told me what happened. What Peter did and said… Shane’s very upset”  
“So am I. Do you know where they went?”  
“Upstairs. They’re sleeping in the guestroom tonight. Shane said he was going to find a B&B for the night but I wouldn’t let them leave, not during that awful storm”  
“Trish, I don’t think I can ever thank you enough… “  
“You don’t have to. Shane’s practically family and I couldn’t turn him away”  
“Tell me he’s okay? Please?”  
“Honestly, I’ve never seen him so drained. Nicky’s doing all he can for him but I’m worried that it won’t be enough. How long had you known about them?”  
“As long as they’ve been together, so about a month”  
“They seem to really care for each other…”  
“Yeah” Mae stifled a sob. “I just wish Peter could see it. Nicky makes Shane so happy”  
“Listen, I don’t want to keep you up but I just had to call and let you know they’re both okay. They’re safe and dry… And will be until morning”  
“Thank you, Trish”  
“You’re welcome. Goodnight Mae”  
“Goodnight Trish”

Mae hung up the phone and sank down onto the couch. She was relieved to know that her son hadn’t attempted to drive too far in the horrendous weather. Shane and Nicky were safe for now and she just hoped her husband would see reason soon. Then Shane would be able to come home.   
She went up the stairs and into the spare bedroom. One bed was unmade and some of Nicky’s belongings were still in the room. Blinking back more tears, she walked over to the other bed and lay down. There was no way she could share a bed with her husband tonight.

**--**

Nicky sat in the driver’s seat of his car with Shane in the passenger seat. They were currently parked in front of Shane’s childhood home. The brunette was attempting to build up the courage to go inside. His father’s car wasn’t there but his mother’s was. They sat in silence for around ten minutes until Shane unbuckled his seatbelt. Nicky did the same.

Shane climbed out of the car and walked up the front walk. Stopping on the porch, he raised his hand and knocked. It felt strange; he’d never had to knock at his own house before… But it wasn’t his home anymore.

The door opened and Mae shrieked with joy. She threw her arms around her son and pulled him into a hug. He returned the embrace with equal determination. Nicky watched them, smiling sadly to himself. Once Mae reluctantly released Shane, she turned her attention to Nicky and hugged him too.

“Come in, come in” Mae insisted. “Can I get you something? Tea? Coffee? Pancakes? Waffles?”  
“We’re fine, mam” Shane replied. “We already ate”  
“I know what happened… Trish phoned me last night and told me you were both okay”  
“Is dad at work?”  
“He is”  
“We just came to get the rest of Nicky’s stuff. Since we left in a hurry last night”  
“Shane, your father didn’t mean the things he said”  
“Yes, he did”  
“No-”  
“Mam, he said some of the most hurtful things I’ve ever heard to both me and Nicky. And I know he did mean them. You can tell yourself that he was upset and wasn’t thinking when he said what he did but you’re wrong. He said he saw us together on Saturday… He had twenty four hours to think about it. And that was the conclusion he came to… That we were sick and perverted”  
“Shane-”  
“I’m sure you’re going to try and make me change my mind but I can’t. I can’t stay here with him while he thinks that way. The second he told Nicky he wasn’t welcome here, he sealed my future here too”  
“No,”  
“I’m sorry, mam… But, think of it as me leaving early for College. I would have been leaving in a few weeks anyway”  
“But where will you go? What will you do for money?”  
“I have a little in my savings but I’ll get a job”

“I’ll look after you” Nicky spoke up. “I have savings too and I have a job. Plus I got a full ride to UCD. So I won’t need as much… And I will gladly give you any spare cent I have”  
Shane smiled at his love. “I really hope it doesn’t come to that”

“There’s no changing your mind, is there?” Mae asked.  
“I’m sorry but no” Shane said.  
He took hold of Nicky’s hand and led the older boy upstairs. Once there, Nicky returned to the spare room and collected the rest of his belongings. He then made his way into Shane’s room and saw the brunette searching through the boxes in his room.

“Would you mind taking that pile down to the car?” Shane asked, nodding towards the pile of boxes in the corner.  
“Sure” Nicky replied.  
Shane pulled a suitcase out from under his bed and started throwing his clothes into it. By the time Nicky had taken the last box to the car, Shane had packed the majority of his clothes away.  
They carted a few more boxes outside followed by the suitcase then it was suddenly time to leave

Mae couldn’t bring herself to say goodbye to her son. She closed herself into her bedroom and cried. Shane knocked on the door several timed but she refused to come out.  
“I love you, mam” Shane shouted through the door. “I promise I’ll call you soon”

Then he and Nicky were walking down the stairs for the last time. They climbed back into Nicky’s car and the blonde turned the key in the ignition. The car moved down the drive and Shane looked out the window. He could see his mother’s silhouette in the upstairs window and blinked back more tears.  
He had no idea when he would next see this house, his father or his mother again. Sensing Shane’s upset, Nicky reached out and squeezed his hand. The blonde didn’t speak; he knew there were no words that would be appropriate at this time.   
Shane looked to Nicky and nodded his head then he leaned back in the passenger seat and let the tears come.


	2. Part 2

Shane cried on and off for the majority of the drive. They didn’t speak much, neither one wanting to focus on all that had happened over the past twelve hours. Nicky’s original plan of a leisurely trip home didn’t follow that path. A part of him was just eager to get Shane back to Dublin… Though another part of him wanted to prolong the journey, for the sooner they reached their destination, the sooner they would have to face Nicky’s parents.  
They did stop several times along the way. Twice to stretch their legs, once for petrol and once for lunch though neither one of them was very hungry. The meal time was mostly spent playing with their food while only taking an occasional nibble.

As they neared Dublin, Nicky really began to worry. Shane’s father hadn’t taken the news of Shane’s sexuality very well. Nicky was hopeful his own father would take it much better. A part of him was dreading the pending conversation. They had already had one confrontation not to mention having to retell the story to Dr. Bennett.

It was after three o’clock when Nicky pulled his car into the driveway. He climbed out and made his way inside with Shane. The house was deserted as both his parents and older brother were all still at work.  
“What do we do now?” Shane asked him.  
“My parents should be home in a few hours” Nicky replied. “What do you feel like doing?”  
“Can we maybe go up to your room?”   
“Sure”

Nicky took Shane’s hand and led the brunette up to his bedroom. They went inside and the older boy closed then locked the door. He turned around and found Shane sitting on his bed. The brunette held his arms out to Nicky and the older boy crossed the room, climbing onto the bed beside him.

“I don’t want to get your hopes up, Nix” Shane said to him. “But I just wanted to come up here so we could lie down together”  
“That’s okay; I wasn’t expecting you to be up for anything today”  
“Can you hold me, Nix? Just for a little while?”  
The blonde nodded his head as Shane lay down on the bed. Nicky lay down beside him and wrapped his arms around the younger boy’s body. They both closed their eyes but neither of them slept. They were too nervous of what was still to come.

**--**

They were still on Nicky’s bed when his mother and brother arrived home, not five minutes apart. The blonde got up but told Shane to stay put. He went down the stairs and found his mother and older brother, Danny, in the Kitchen.

“Hi mam” he greeted her. “Hey Danny”  
“Hey bro. Welcome home”  
“How was your trip?” Yvonne asked her son. “I’m just about to put dinner on, any requests?”  
“Uh, can we maybe order in?” Nicky asked. “I really need to talk to you and dad as soon as he gets home”  
“This sounds ominous”  
“I’ll pay, it’s just really important that we talk and tea might get cold in the meantime”  
“Yeah, okay, it’s fine Nicky. What do you want to talk about?”  
“Not until dad gets home… I’ll be in my room until then”

The blonde went back upstairs and walked straight over to the window. He sat at his desk, gazing out the window, waiting to see his father’s car pull into the drive.  
Knock! Knock!

“Who is it?” Nicky called.  
“It’s me!” Danny replied.  
Not having a bathroom to hide in, Shane wasn’t sure what to do. His instinct was telling him to run but Nicky shook his head no. The blonde then got up and unlocked the door, letting his brother into the room.  
“So, what’s the big secret?” Danny demanded. His eyes rested upon Shane, sitting on Nicky’s bed and he stopped.  
“What’s he doing here?” Danny asked.

“Shane’s father kicked him out” Nicky stated.  
“What? Why would he do that?” Danny replied.  
“I think it had something to do with him walking in on the two of us having sex”  
“With each other?”  
“Yes, with each other”  
“Whoa!”

“Nix, did you have to be so blunt?” Shane asked him.  
“No, but he’s my brother, he can take it” Nicky replied.  
“Well, I hope you’re a lot gentler with mam and dad when you tell them” Danny said.  
“I will be, trust me”  
“So the two of you are, like, together?”  
“Yeah” Nicky walked over and slid his hand into Shane’s. “Yeah, we are”  
“How long’s this been going on?”  
“A few weeks”  
“Wow”  
“Is that a good wow or a bad wow?”  
“A surprised wow… I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for you both. I’m just… I really wasn’t expecting it”  
“Neither were we… But it just kinda happened right before Shane moved back to Sligo. I knew I didn’t want to lose him”  
“Nicky climbed in my bedroom window” Shane spoke up. “And told me he was in love with me… Two days after calling me a queer”  
“You what?” Danny asked Nicky.  
“Shane kissed me and I freaked out, okay? I didn’t want to be gay and I was trying to deny my feelings for him… So when he kissed me, I panicked”  
“And you forgave him?” he asked Shane.  
“Of course I did… Because I’m in love with him” Shane smiled and kissed Nicky.

“Whoa!” Danny covered his eyes. “Look, I’m okay with you two just so long as I don’t have to watch you make out, okay?”  
“Okay” Nicky said.  
“Sounds fair” Shane agreed.

“So, you’re going to tell mam and dad when dad gets home?” Danny asked them.  
“Yeah” Nicky replied. “We have to. Shane has no where else to go and I want them to know the truth. I don’t want to have to hide our relationship from them any more”  
“Well, guess you’re in luck now” Danny said, pointing out the window. “Dad’s home!”

Shane looked at Nicky, a look of nervous apprehension on his face.  
“It’ll be okay” Nicky said to him.  
“Can’t be any worse than my dad” Shane tried to lighten the mood.  
“I’ll go downstairs and get them settled in the Living room” Danny offered.

The older boy took his leave and bounded down the stairs. Nicky turned to Shane and wrapped his arms around his neck. He leaned forward and kissed him, hoping to draw some courage from the younger boy.  
“Moment of truth, huh?” Nicky said.  
“At least you’ve had time to prepare for yours” Shane replied.  
“I can’t believe your dad’s seen me naked… Twice”  
“I guess you could draw some comfort in knowing that he wasn’t *really* looking at you… As impressive as you are,” Shane grabbed hold of Nicky’s groin “down there”

“Shane! Don’t!” Nicky jerked away. The last thing he wanted was to go downstairs with a prominent erection. This conversation was going to be awkward enough without being turned on at the same time.  
“Sorry, Nix” Shane apologized. “Couldn’t help myself.  
“Come on, let’s go”

*

Nicky held Shane’s hand as they made their way down the hall but once the reached the base of the stairs, they de-coupled. The blonde took the lead and stepped into the Living room. His mother and father were seated on the couch; Danny was standing in front of the bookcase.

“Shane?” Yvonne stated. “Nicky, why didn’t you tell me Shane was here?”  
She stood up and hurried over to him. Yvonne pulled him in to a hug then released him.  
“Mam, I think you should sit back down” Nicky said to her.

His mother looked at him then to Shane. Now that she was standing so close to the brunette, she could see the faint bruise under his eye. Shane looked at her and instantly knew she was examining his bruise.  
Mrs. Byrne returned to her husband’s side and sat down.

Nicky took a deep breath then slowly released it. He looked at his father then to his mother and back again. This didn’t help him so he looked up at his brother. Danny grinned and nodded at him encouragingly.

“Well, I’m not really sure how to do this” Nicky began. “I haven’t exactly rehearsed what I’m going to say or am supposed to say… Mam, dad, I love you both very much and I want you to know that I appreciate everything you’ve done for me over years… Not just the big things, holidays and soccer games and stuff but little things too… Like driving me places before I was old enough to drive myself, letting me decide which college I wanted to go to and what I wanted to do with my life, coming to all my soccer games when I was a kid and now, never missing a single one…”  
“Nicky? What’s gotten into you?” his father asked.  
“Nothing… I just… I need to tell you something and I don’t know how you‘re going to react”  
“Well, whatever it is, it can’t be as ominous as you’re making it sound, surely?”

Nicky took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Unable to look at either of them, he opened his mouth and uttered two simple words.  
“I’m gay” 

“I’m sorry, what?” Nikki asked him to repeat himself.  
“Mam, dad… I’m gay” Nicky said.  
“Yeah, that’s what I thought you said”  
“And?”  
“And… What?”  
“Well, aren’t you going to say something else? Like, yell or cry or… Something?”  
“Uh, okay… Are you sure you’re gay?”   
“Pretty sure”  
“How pretty sure?”

Nicky turned and looked at Shane. The brunette moved forward and slipped his hand into Nicky’s.  
“Sure enough to call Shane my boyfriend” Nicky replied, grasping Shane’s hand tight.

“Thank you for finally telling us” Yvonne said.  
“What? You mean, you already knew?” Shane couldn’t help asking.  
“I’d suspected but I wasn’t going to say anything until Nicky was ready to tell us himself”  
“I was curious too” Nikki added. “After I went to use the computer one day and the search history hadn’t been cleared. Danny wasn’t home and I knew Nicky was the last one to use the computer after me that morning”  
“How long?” Nicky asked. “How long have you known?”   
“Two weeks”  
“About a month” Yvonne said. “When I saw how heartbroken you were at the thought of Shane moving back to Sligo… Then, the night before he was moving, you didn’t come home at all and… I assumed you were at his place”  
“I was” Nicky confessed.

“Okay, this isn’t fair” Shane said, pulling Nicky’s attention away from his parents and back to him. “Why are your parents so nice about this while mine…?”  
The brunette burst into tears and Nicky hugged him.  
“I’m sorry, Shay” Nicky said. He looked up at his parents. “While I was in Sligo, his father found out about us and… Let’s just say he hadn’t had suspicions for as long as you”  
“Is that how you got that bruise on your face, Shane?” Yvonne asked.  
“Yes” Shane sobbed.  
“Shane’s father didn’t approve of us being together. He told me I had to leave and that I wasn’t welcome in his house any more”  
“Oh no”  
“Then Shane said he was coming with me and Mr. Filan told him… He said if Shane walked out the door with me then he wouldn’t be welcome there anymore either”  
“No” Yvonne gasped. “He didn’t”  
“I’m afraid he did”

“Tell them what else he did” Shane said.  
“What?” Nicky replied.  
“To you”  
“No”

“Nicky, did Shane’s father do something to you?” Danny spoke for the first time.  
“Look, he grabbed me and…” Nicky trailed off. He reached up and pulled back the sleeve of his jacket, revealing the bandage on his arm. “It’s just a sprain; it’ll be fine in a few days”  
“I have half a mind to drive up there right now and sprain his wrist” Danny said.  
“Danny, no! It would only make things worse… This will heal and it’ll be like it never happened”  
“For you, maybe” Shane said.  
“No, I didn’t mean it like that” Nicky said. “I just, I don’t think your father did it intentionally and going out of our way to inflict pain on him? It’s not right”  
“I think my being gay has inflicted enough pain on him right now”  
“Shane, don’t think like that”

Nicky pulled Shane aside while Yvonne turned to her husband. For the next few minutes, both couples were engaged in whispered conversations. Danny looked from one to the other, wondering what the outcome of each discussion would be.  
Eventually his parents climbed to their feet and approached his brother. Danny moved closer, wanting to hear what they were going to say. Nicky turned from Shane and looked to his parents. He didn’t release Shane’s hand.

“I’m thinking pizza for dinner” Yvonne said.  
“Danny, can you phone them? Tell them we’ll pick the order up” Nikki added. “I feel like going for a drive”  
“Can I come too?” Danny replied.  
“Sure” his father agreed. “Just order the usual… And whatever Shane wants”  
“I’m not hungry” Shane spoke up.  
“Too bad, you have to eat something”

Danny moved towards the door but stopped, his parents still hadn’t addressed the main issue here and he didn’t want to miss it.  
“Nicky, Shane,” Yvonne said. “We’ve talked it over and we’re agreed that Shane will stay here for as long as he wants”  
“Really?” Nicky asked.  
“Yes. I know college will be starting in a few weeks anyway. Nicky, had you given any more thought to what you’re going to do?”  
“I know I said I was thinking of staying here but… Shane’s coming to UCD with me-”  
“Then you’re both welcome to stay”  
“Mrs. Byrne, I couldn’t impose for that long” Shane stated.  
“Nonsense, you’re not imposing”  
“We do have a few ground rules though” Nikki said. “The main one being, Shane will move into the guest room” he looked at Nicky. “Not your bedroom”   
Nicky sighed with mock disappointment.  
“All we ask is for you to be respectful, which I know you will be, and be patient with us. I’m not going to lie and say I’m thrilled about this… But I’m not going to disown Nicky either. I’m not about to cover my car in bumper stickers claiming to be the proud father of a gay son… Not yet anyway”  
“Dad, all I ask is that you give me a chance” Nicky said. “And you are. I’ll make sure Shane knows all the house rules and everything. He uh… We left his car in Sligo but he can borrow mine whenever he wants too”

“Danny, I don’t hear you ordering pizzas” Yvonne said.  
“Course you don’t, I’m eavesdropping” Danny replied, smiling. “Come on, you didn’t think I’d be able to resist this conversation, did you? My little brother’s boyfriend is moving in with us”  
“That’s alright with you, isn’t it?”  
“Why would I care?”  
“This is your home too, you have a say here”  
“I say let him stay and forget the guest room… They’re young and curious”

Both Nicky and Shane felt their cheeks flushing. Yvonne’s face seemed to darken too but she quickly diverted the conversation.  
“The guest room will be ideal” She said.  
“Not for Nicky” Danny sniggered.  
“Danny!” Nicky had always been teased by his older brother but it was never usually this embarrassing. 

“I think that’s enough for tonight” Nikki said. “Danny, why don’t you get ordering? Nicky, Shane, I’m assuming you have some of your belongings in the car?”  
Shane nodded his head.  
“You better bring them inside then”

Nicky finally released Shane’s hand and he hugged both of his parents, whispering his thanks to each of them. Then he led Shane out into the yard to begin unpacking. Danny finally went to the phone and ordered dinner while Nikki and Yvonne remained in the Living room.

“We are doing the right thing here, aren’t we?” Yvonne asked.  
“How could we say no?” Nikki replied. “They both looked like they’d been through a war zone”  
“I can’t believe what Peter did. I mean, how could he do that to his own son? Not to mention what he did to ours”  
“I’m not happy about that either but… It sounds like it wasn’t intentional… Not Nicky’s injury anyway”  
“And Shane? The poor lad looks so defeated… His own father hit him? Simply for being in love with our son”   
“You know, I told Nicky I wasn’t ready to declare myself ‘proud of my gay son’ but maybe I should be”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well, Nicky saw what happened. He watched someone he loves be hurt by their own father and he also got hurt in the process. But he stood by Shane… And Shane got kicked out of his home because he wouldn’t let Nicky leave. I am proud of our son, Von, because he had faith and trust enough in us to bring Shane here… He didn’t know how we’d react but he was willing to take the chance. He took Shane away from where he wasn’t welcome anymore and brought him here, to us”  
“You’re right. That was a lot to put on the shoulders of an eighteen year old… And it sounds like they sure went through a lot to make sure they could stay together”  
“I like Shane; he’s a good lad… And he doesn’t deserve to be treated the way he was simply because he fell in love with Nicky”  
“What do we do if they break up? Shane has no where else to go but… Nicky will always been my priority”  
“I say we worry about that later. For now we just try to be supportive”

Yvonne nodded her head then leaned forward and kissed her husband. She was very proud of him right now. In a way, she’d been afraid that his reaction to Nicky’s sexuality could have gone down the same path as Peter’s but it hadn’t.  
“But,” Nikki said pulling her into a hug. “I think you should phone Mae tomorrow… Just, to let her know that Shane’s welcome and will be staying with us”  
“And to confirm the story… Make sure they were telling us the truth?”  
“I wasn’t going to say it but yes”  
She nodded her head in agreement. “You don’t really think they’re lying, do you?”  
“No but I’d like to hear the other side of the story too… Just to be sure”

“Hey dad,” Danny popped his head into the room. “You ready to go…? Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt”  
“Yeah, I’m ready” his father replied. He kissed his wife’s cheek and she smiled nervously at him. “Do you want to come with us?”  
She shook her head. “I think I’ll stay here with them”  
“Worried they’re gonna get up to something naughty while we’re gone?” Danny piped up.  
“Danny, stop it”

Yvonne exchanged another look with her husband before he followed their eldest son from the room. She moved into the Kitchen and heard Nicky and Shane coming down the stairs. They both went outside so she took a seat at the table, replaying in her mind everything that had just happened. She couldn’t say how long she remained there but her thoughts were interrupted by Nicky himself.

“Mam?” he addressed her from the doorway.  
“Come here,” she called him over.  
Nicky entered the room and walked over to his mother. She stood up and wrapped her arms around him, holding him tight, the way she used to when he was just a child.  
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you” Nicky said. “I wanted to but I was scared… I thought you’d be disappointed in me”  
“Oh Nicky, I could never be disappointed in you… You’re my son”  
She released him then indicated for him to take a seat while she returned to hers. They both sat at the table, looking across at each other.

“Where’s Shane? Still unpacking the car?”   
“No, he’s upstairs… He wanted to lie down before dinner, said he wasn’t feeling well”  
“I’m really proud of you, you know?”  
“You are? Why?”  
“For the way you’ve handled this whole situation and how you’ve taken care of Shane. He really needs you right now”  
“I feel like it’s my fault” Nicky confessed.  
“What? Why is that?” Yvonne asked.  
“If I hadn’t gone to see him this wouldn’t have happened”  
“Oh, you had to go sweetheart, you were miserable here without him. Those few days from when you told me you were going up until you actually left, were the happiest I’d seen you since he left… Which was another indication that you were, well, are… In love with him”  
Nicky nodded his head. “Thank you for being so understanding”  
“I’m trying my best”

*

Danny ended up driving his father’s car to the Pizza shop. Despite the older man’s statement about wanting to go for a drive, Nikki hadn’t wanted to sit behind the wheel of the car. When they reached the parking lot, Danny stopped the car then turned and looked at his father.

“Are you sure you’re okay with all this?” he asked him.  
“Yeah, I like pizza”  
“I’m not talking about food, dad”  
“I know…” he turned and met his son’s eyes. “You’re talking about your brother”  
“It’s just that you’re so calm about it… And letting Shane move in with us? That’s a pretty big step, considering they’ve only been together for a month”  
“Well, what other choice did we have? Doing the same thing Peter did and risk losing Nicky in the process?”  
“But you didn’t react like Mr. Filan did. You barely even hesitated”

“Danny, we’ve known Shane for almost a year. We know he’s a good kid who’s not out to cause any trouble. Who knows, in a few days it might all blow over and he can go home. But, in the meantime, it’s best that he’s with people who care about him… And, at this very moment, no one cares more for him that Nicky does”  
“We care about him too though… I mean, I wouldn’t want him going home if his father is going to be mean to him”  
“Peter’s not a bad person, son. He just got upset and, hopefully, in time, he’ll realize that he over-reacted and will welcome Shane home but until then…”  
“Until then, he should be staying with us… That’s really cool of you, dad”  
“Nicky’s going to college soon… Your mother doesn’t want to lose him before she has to”  
“You really think he’d go? That he would choose Shane over us?”  
Nikki shrugged his shoulders. “Shane did; he chose to leave his family for Nicky… Why wouldn’t Nicky do the same?”

**--**

The five of them sat around the dining room table, eating in silence. Shane really wasn’t hungry and forced himself to nibble on a slice of pizza. He felt like he was somewhere he shouldn’t be, like he was imposing on another family’s dinner. No one was speaking and he felt that was his fault too. Any conversation felt forced and ended very abruptly.

“Hey Shane,” Danny spoke up. “I found dad’s old karaoke machine. What do you say we give it a whirl after tea? Nicky says you’re a great singer”  
“Thanks Danny but I don’t think I really feel up to it” Shane replied.  
“Maybe tomorrow night, Dan…” Nicky added. “I’m anxious to give it another go. It’s been years since dad let me use it”

“So you got accepted to UCD, Shane?” Yvonne asked him.  
“I did” Shane replied.  
“Still planning on studying accounting?”  
“Uh… No… Not exactly”  
“Shane never wanted to be an accountant” Nicky told his mother. “It was what his father wanted him to do”  
“Oh… I uh I didn’t know”  
“He wasn’t too happy when he found out about that either” Shane added.  
“What will you study instead?” Nikki asked.  
“English… Creative writing” Shane replied.  
“Shay’s an amazing writer” Nicky gushed. “Accounting would be a waste of his talent”  
“Nix-”  
“Don’t deny it, Shay. You have a gift and I’m going to continue telling you that every day until you start to believe me”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders. “I write because I enjoy it, not because I’m good at it”

Ring! Ring!  
Danny reached into his pocket and pulled out his mobile.  
“I know we don’t usually allow calls at the table but can I answer it? Please?” Danny asked.  
“This once” Nikki said.  
“Thanks!” he raised the phone and pressed a button. “Hey Caitlin… Nah, just eating dinner…”

“Who’s Caitlin?” Shane asked Nicky.  
“Danny’s girlfriend”  
“He has a girlfriend? Since when?”  
“Uh, two months?”  
“No, three” Yvonne replied. “Anniversary last week”  
“Three months? That has to be a record for him, right?” Shane asked.

“Sorry I can’t tonight…” They heard Danny’s voice coming from the other room. “Yeah, my brother’s boyfriend just moved in with us… I didn’t know either… I swear, I would have told you if I’d known”  
Nicky caught Shane’s eye and they exchanged a smile. Nicky had thought it would be weird, making his relationship with Shane so public but it really wasn’t. In fact, a part of him was proud to know Danny was already telling people.

A moment later, Danny reappeared. He tucked his phone back into his pocket and sat back down at the table.  
“Caitlin’s coming over for dinner tomorrow night, mam” Danny stated. “That’s okay, isn’t it?”  
“Its fine, sweetheart” Yvonne replied.  
“And why’s she coming over?” Nicky asked.  
“She was upset with me for not telling her you were gay… So she wants to meet the boyfriend”

“Well, I can’t believe you, of all people, are in a long-term relationship” Shane stated.  
“Well *I* can’t believe you’re fucking my brother” Danny replied.  
Both Nicky and his father began to choke on their food. Nicky quickly averted his gaze and looked down at the table. His father coughed and looked at his wife for a distraction.  
“Okay, I walked right into that one” Shane replied.  
“She’s a really sweet girl, you’ll like her and I’m sure she’ll like you”  
“Then I look forward to meeting her… Nicky? Have you met her yet?”  
“Yeah, a couple of times…” Nicky said. “I always thought she could do better”  
“I’m sure Shane could too” Danny sniped.

“Okay, I think that’s enough relationship talk for tonight” Yvonne spoke up. “Perhaps we could talk about something else?”

**--**

Shane was the first to retire for the night. It was still early but he mostly wanted to be alone. The Byrne’s were being so accommodating but, deep down, he didn’t want to be there. He wanted to be at home, with his family.   
He knew he would never forget the look on his father’s face and it broke his heart. Every time he closed his eyes, he could see the anger, disgust and disappointment directed his way and he fought back tears. Shane had always worried how his father would react but the reality had been so much worse.  
He heard a knock at the door then it opened and Nicky stepped into the room. Shane immediately feigned sleep but the blonde didn’t fall for it.

“I know you’re not really asleep” Nicky said to him.  
“I’m trying to be” was Shane’s muffled reply.  
“Shay, if you want to be alone, just tell me and I’ll go”  
“I want to be alone, Nix…” 

Nicky moved into the room, through the darkness to the bed. Shane sat up and reached for the blonde. Somehow, Nicky managed to move better in the dark. He leaned forward and kissed Shane’s forehead.  
“You don’t have to pretend around me, Shay” Nicky whispered. “If you want to be alone, you just have to tell me”  
“I’m sorry”  
“Don’t be… I understand”  
“What’s to understand? That your parents are better than mine?”  
“Clearly I just wasn’t as good at hiding it as you were”  
“Please, I don’t want to talk about this anymore… Not tonight”  
“Okay” Nicky kissed him again. “Night Shay”  
“Good night, Nix”

Nicky moved towards the door but Shane called out to him.  
“What? What is it?” Nicky asked.  
“Nothing… Just, thank you” Shane replied.  
“I wish it didn’t have to be like this”  
“I know. So do I”  
“Good night”  
“Night”  
Nicky slipped out and pulled the door closed behind him. He hated seeing Shane so defeated and upset. He hated that there wasn’t anything he could do to help him… That he was already doing all he could didn’t seem to be enough.

He went back downstairs just as his parents were heading up to bed as they both had work the next day. Nicky walked into the Living room and sank down on the couch. Danny handed him a bottle of beer which he accepted and took a long swig.

“Long day, huh?” Danny asked him.  
“The longest” Nicky replied.  
“You didn’t tell mam and dad *exactly* what happened”  
“I was trying to go easy on them… Would you have told them, if it were you?”  
“Guess not… Why did you tell me though?”  
“You’re my brother… You always liked to share your sexual exploits with me, this time it was my turn”  
“Pretty embarrassing though”  
“No kidding”

“And… Are you really sure?” Danny asked him. “Like… Really really sure?”   
“About what?”  
“Being gay… And being with Shane”

“Danny!”  
“Come on, Nix… I have to ask! You said yourself, you’ve only been with him for a month and for most of that, you were in different towns. Look, I understand if you got caught up in the moment last time he was here but that doesn’t mean it has to continue”  
“Are you saying you don’t want him here?”  
“No, of course not”  
“Then what? What exactly are you trying to say to me?”  
“Nothing… I just… Not everyone is going to be as accepting as we are. Look at Mr. Filan for example. Other people will react the same way as him, you know they will… Do you really want to put yourself through all that? And what if you catch something?”  
“I’m not going to ‘catch anything’ from Shane… We’ve only ever been with each other”  
“And if he starts sleeping around? Or when you break up and you start experimenting? Do you even know what you’re getting yourself into?”   
“Danny… I… I can’t believe I’m hearing this, from you of all people! The lad who, just four months ago, was bragging about scoring with 3 different girls in one weekend…”  
“That’s different”  
“How? How is it any different?”  
“I was careful and-”  
“You think I won’t be? And it’s reassuring to know that you’ve already written me and Shane off… And that you think I’m just going to go out and jump in bed with any and every lad out there”  
“Nix, that’s not what I meant”  
“Well, it sure sounds like it”

Nicky thrust the bottle back at his brother and climbed to his feet.  
“Nicky, wait” Danny tried to call him back.  
“No” Nicky turned to his older brother. “Thanks, for telling me what you really think”  
After saying that, Nicky left the room. He bounded up the stairs and into his bedroom, closing the door behind him. The blonde wasn’t sure if he should feel angry or upset so he settled somewhere in between. He started vehemently punching his pillow while silent tears rolled down his cheeks.

*

By the time he managed to calm down, Nicky’s pillow didn’t resemble much of a pillow anymore. He closed his eyes and lie down on the mattress, staring into the darkness.  
Knock. Knock.   
Hoping it was Shane; Nicky climbed off the bed and walked over to the door. He quietly opened it but found his brother in the hall instead. He started to close the door but Danny threw out his arm and stopped him.

“Listen, I’m really sorry, Nix” Danny whispered. “I… I wanted to apologize. I didn’t mean to upset you…”  
“Well you did” Nicky replied.  
“I know. I’m sorry, okay? Look, can I come in?”  
Nicky looked towards his parents room, the door was firmly closed. He nodded and stepped back. Danny walked into his brother’s room and Nicky closed the door behind him.  
The younger boy went back to his bed and switched the lamp on. Danny sat down in the desk chair.

“I’m just worried about you” Danny stated. “I’m your big brother and it’s my job to look out for you”  
“Danny-”  
“I mean, I used to beat up kids that made fun of you but I can’t do that anymore…”  
“I never asked you to do that”  
“I know you didn’t but I did it anyway… Because you’re my brother” he paused, hesitant. “I just… I really want you to understand what all this means… What you’re getting yourself into”  
“I’m not ‘getting myself into’ anything… I’m just… Living my life and I want Shane to be a part of that life”  
“I know you do… But, have you *really* thought about it? I mean, Shane’s given up everything for you”  
“His father pushed him into it”  
“But Shane chose to leave with you. He could have let you go and stayed there, with his family but he didn’t… And his decision to go to UCD, it’s all for you. He could go to any college anywhere he wanted but he chose the one where he could be with you”  
“I don’t understand… What are you trying to say?”  
“What happens if, in a few months time, Shane regrets the decisions he’s made and blames you?”  
“He won’t”  
“You don’t know that, not for sure. Are you going to tell me that he just decided UCD was where he had to go, because it was the best place for him? Or was it because he knew that’s where you were going to be”  
“Danny-”  
“I know that he says he loves you… I mean, I can see it from the way he looks at you but… What will you do when he wakes up one day and decides you’re not enough for him?”  
“Why can’t you just let me have this now? I mean…“ Nicky took a breath to calm himself down. “Maybe what we have won’t last but can’t you just let me… Us… Enjoy it for now?  
“Nicky, I’m not trying to-“

Danny’s words were drowned out by a noise from the next room. Nicky was on his feet and out the door like a bullet. He threw open the door to the guestroom and hurried over to the bed. Danny turned the light on and watched as Nicky tried to rouse Shane from his nightmare.

“Shay, wake up” Nicky pleaded. “Its okay, everything’s okay…”

Shane awoke with a violent shudder. He could feel Nicky’s arms around him and he clung to the older boy as though his life depended on it. He was shaking and tears were spilling down his cheeks.

“Its okay, I’ve got you” Nicky whispered.  
“He was hurting you and I couldn’t stop him” Shane explained. “No matter what I said or did, he… he just wouldn’t stop”  
“It was only a dream, Shay”

Nicky looked up and saw both his brother and his mother standing in the doorway. He lowered his eyes and turned his attention back to Shane. The brunette was still trembling, his fingers practically digging into Nicky’s skin.

Yvonne pulled Danny aside and told him to go to bed. Her eldest son did as he was told, casting one final look of concern at the couple in the guestroom. Yvonne saw the look on Nicky’s face and her heart almost broke. Unsure of what else to do, she walked away, down the stairs and into the Kitchen.

“I’m sorry” Shane whispered through his tears. “I didn’t mean to wake you”  
“You didn’t” Nicky replied. “I was still up, talking to Danny”  
“Every time I close my eyes, I see the way my dad looked at us and it makes me feel sick to my stomach”  
“Is that what you were thinking about when you went to sleep?” Shane nodded his head.  
“It’s not like I could think of anything else” he said.  
“I shouldn’t have asked… Oh Shay, I’m so sorry”  
“For what? Comforting me? Giving me a place to stay? Loving me?”  
“No, I’m sorry that this happened… If I hadn’t gone into your room last night…”  
“And if I had just locked the door… Nicky, you have nothing to be sorry for”  
“But you gave up everything to be with me… You could have stayed, with your family…”

“Shane?”  
The two lads looked up and saw Yvonne standing in the doorway. She hadn’t wanted to barge in unannounced. Now that they knew she was there, she walked into the room and handed the brunette a glass of warm milk.  
The sight of it filled Shane’s eyes with tears.  
“Thank you Mrs Byrne” he choked out. 

She nodded her head and moved away. Shane’s hands were trembling as he raised the glass to his lips. He sipped it slowly. Nicky watched in silence, remembering all the times his mother had bought him a glass of warm milk to help him sleep… Something she had often done when he was a child. He’d always accepted it as a sign of her love for him. It made him feel warm inside, knowing his mother was showing Shane the same affection she’d always shown him.  
Nicky took the empty glass from Shane and placed it on the bedside cabinet. Shane was still shaking with silent tears rolling down his cheeks. Without a second thought, Nicky pulled back the duvet and slid into the bed beside Shane, pulling the brunette into his arms and holding him close. Shane buried his face in Nicky’s chest and closed his eyes.

Yvonne looked at the two lads. Shane clinging to Nicky like there was no tomorrow; Nicky holding Shane supportively in his arms. She watched, almost transfixed, as Nicky gently soothed the brunette. She knew the right thing to do was send Nicky back to his own room. Her husband had been firm when he’d agreed to the arrangement… Shane was to stay in the guestroom and not Nicky’s bedroom.  
However, Shane *was* in the guestroom now… She bit her lip then smiled, sympathetically at the couple before turning off the light and leaving the room.

It wasn’t right to separate them, not tonight. They had both been through a lot in the past few days and Shane needed time to accept just how much his life was going to change.

Yvonne returned to her room and climbed into bed beside Nikki.  
“Wha’s goin’ on?” he asked, groggy from sleep.  
“Shane had a bad dream” she explained.  
“He okay now?”  
“He’ll be fine, Nicky’s with him”  
“Von, I thought we had an agreement…”  
“We do… But starting tomorrow night, I think”  
“Well, you better hope they don’t make a habit of it”  
“Shane’s whole life has been turned upside down, what’s the harm in letting Nicky hold him for a while?”  
“Harm? I guess there isn’t any… I’m too tired to argue about it now anyway”  
“That’s nice dear, good night”  
“Night”  
Yvonne smiled to herself as her husband drifted back off to sleep. 

**--**

Nicky didn’t sleep much that night. He hated to admit it but his brother’s words had seeped into his brain and he couldn’t shake them. What Danny had said was true; Shane *had* given up everything for him… Would he come to regret it? Sooner rather than later?  
He shifted his position and looked around the room. In the corner was the pile of boxes Shane had brought with him. It wasn’t much; Nicky assumed they were the typical type of things one would take to college with them. He turned back to Shane but the brunette was still sleeping, he’d awoken several times during the night but hadn’t disturbed anyone else in the house.

The blonde looked up at the open door, seeing the humour in the fact that his mother had left it open during the night. His father was standing in the doorframe, all dressed for work. Nicky waved his hand in greeting and his father nodded his head then indicated for his son to approach him.  
Nicky quietly slipped out of the bed being careful not to disturb Shane. He walked over to his father then they both moved into the hall. Nikki pulled the door closed.

“I know what you’re going to say” Nicky said.  
“You do, do you?”   
“Yes… And I could give you some lame excuse like ‘you said Shane had to stay in the guestroom but you didn’t say I couldn’t go in there’ or something similar… And you might point out that you gave us one rule and, after just one night, we’ve already broken it… And for that I’m sorry, dad but I… I couldn’t leave him. He was upset and he… he needed me… I needed to be with him… And I swear nothing happened!”  
“Nicky, I understand and I’m not mad”  
“You’re not?”  
“No, your mother told me Shane was having a bad night and that you were with him, to make sure he was okay” Nicky nodded his head. “I understand but… I don’t want you to make me regret my decision of having him stay here”  
“I won’t… I promise!”  
“Okay… Just remember, we’re all new at this. I’ll give you some lee-way so long as you give me and your mother the same in return…“

On that note, his father turned and made his way down the hall. Nicky turned around and went back into the guestroom. Shane was still sleeping. He glanced at the clock, trying to decide if he should join him or go down stairs to join his father.  
Decision made, he went back to his own room and quickly got dressed. Then he went down stairs and found both his parents in the Kitchen. They were talking in hushed tones but stopped when they saw him.  
“Morning Nicky” his mother said.  
“Morning” he replied, looking suspiciously at the two of them. “What’s wrong? Why were you whispering just now?”  
“No reason”  
“Come on, you were either talking about me or Shane or both of us”  
“Okay” Yvonne relented.”We know you spent the night in with Shane”  
“Of course you know, you let me” Nicky replied.  
“Under the circumstances, we allowed it last night but…”  
“But you don’t want it to happen again”  
“Exactly”  
“Dad already told me that, not even five minutes ago”  
“Yes, I did” his father stated. “But… The fact is we can’t stop you from… Well... You know? Short of locking you in your room at night, which we obviously won’t do”  
“So you’re saying that you don’t trust us?”  
“We’ve never allowed any of Danny’s girlfriends to stay the night; that same rule should apply to you as well”  
“Look, I know… I know what you’re trying to say and… I won’t betray your trust. You are doing an amazing thing for Shane, letting him stay here, and I won’t do anything to risk that”  
“I know that we keep saying this, again and again, but we have to trust each other on this. We’ll trust you so long as you don’t give us reason to doubt you”

“Why would you even think we would do something like that?” Nicky enquired.  
“Nicky, sweetheart, you’re both teenagers” Yvonne replied. “When Danny was your age-”  
“But I’m not Danny. By the time he was my age, he’d had what, seven girlfriends? I’ve had one… I mean, sure I went on two or three dates with a few different girls but actual relationships? There was only Jessie”  
“We know… But we didn’t think you were the type to sneak out in the middle of the night either”  
“I only did that once…” Nicky argued, feebly.  
“And you sneaked out to see Shane” Yvonne stated. “We’re out of our league here… We don’t know how we should be handling this”  
“You’re not… Regretting letting Shane stay here, are you?”

“No, we just…” Nikki hesitated. “Wish there was some other way…”  
“This isn’t exactly what I wanted either” Nicky told his parents. “I mean, sure when Shane told me he was coming to college with me, I may have imagined what it would be like to live with him… But” he sighed.

“What’s wrong?” Yvonne asked.  
“Just thinking about something Danny said to me last night… I mean, he’s right. Shane & I have only been together for a month and we weren’t even in the same city for that time… I mean, I’m fantasizing about what it would be like to live with someone that I’ve technically only been ‘seeing’ for 4 days”  
“Nicky, you and Shane have an entire year of friendship built up” his mother assured him. “You probably know each other better than most couples do when they start dating”  
“Surely you agree it’s too soon to be living together” Nicky said.

“Under the circumstances… Yes, I think you’re too young but, technically, Shane is a guest in our home. The two of you aren’t ‘living together’… Not yet anyway” Yvonne said. “Perhaps if you’re not sure about this, Shane should move into a dorm when college begins and you could stay here with us”   
“It’s an idea” Nikki agreed. “The campus is only a half hour away”  
“But Shane doesn’t have his car” Nicky said.  
“He wouldn’t really need it” his father replied.

“Or I could drive him home to pick it up” Danny spoke up.  
“How long have you been standing there?” Nicky asked.  
“Long enough… If Shane needs his car, I’ll drive him to Sligo to get it”  
“I can take him”  
“You have to work” his mother spoke up. “Didn’t you change your shift?”  
“Yeah” Nicky groaned. “I did”  
Suddenly, he didn’t like the idea of abandoning Shane but he’d already refused a day of work to visit the younger boy, he couldn’t miss another day. He pushed his next thought aside. If he’d just kept his usual shift, he would have come home on Sunday afternoon and this entire situation could have been avoided.

“What time do you need to be there?” Danny asked his brother.  
“Ten” Nicky replied.  
“I can drop you off, I’m not needed till twelve… Then you can leave your car for Shane, if he needs it”  
Nicky could tell his brother was making an effort to make up for all that he’d said the previous night.  
“Thanks” Nicky agreed.

Realizing that if he didn’t get a move on, he’d be late, Nicky began to wolf down his breakfast then he hurried back up stairs to have a quick shower. He’d completely forgotten that he was meant to go to work today. It was a good thing his mother had mentioned it.  
He dressed in his work uniform and made his way to, what was now, Shane’s room. Nicky pushed the door open and found the brunette sitting up in bed with his phone in his hand.

“Hey,” Nicky greeted him. “Morning  
“Morning” Shane replied, looking up for the first time.  
When he saw Nicky in his work clothes, he didn’t know if he felt happy or sad. A part of him wanted to be left alone and Nicky being at work would guarantee that… However, another part of him was reluctant to be away from the blonde. Nicky was a constant beacon of reassurance.   
“You… You’re working today?” Shane asked.  
Nicky walked into the room and dropped down on the bed beside Shane.  
“Yeah, sorry” Nicky replied. “I kinda forgot about it… Lucky mam reminded me”  
Shane nodded his head.  
“I had to switch my shift from yesterday so… I’m out from ten until six today and seven till three tomorrow”  
Again, Shane simply nodded his head.  
“I don’t like the idea of leaving you” Nicky admitted. “I don’t want you to think I’m abandoning you”  
“Nix, you still have to work… You have to go on about your business” Shane said. “Just because my life’s taken a weird spin doesn’t mean yours should too”  
“But it’s my fault that-”  
“Stop it” Shane dropped his phone and placed both his hands on Nicky’s neck, staring into the blonde’s eyes. “We’ve talked about this already… It wasn’t your fault”   
“I’m never going to stop feeling responsible though”  
“Well, you should… Stop, I mean. We can’t change any of it now… So what difference does it make?”

Nicky sighed then leaned forward, resting his forehead against Shane’s.  
“We’re too young to have to deal with this shit” Nicky stated.  
“Yeah” Shane agreed. “We are”  
The blonde reluctantly pulled away, taking Shane’s hand in his.  
“I have to go” Nicky said. “Danny’s going to give me a ride so you can have my car for the day”  
“I won’t need it”  
“I’m leaving it for you anyway. I don’t want you to feel like you’re trapped here”  
Nicky leaned forward and kissed Shane’s forehead. He then placed his keys on the table beside the bed and stood up.  
“I’ll be home just after six” Nicky stated.  
“See you then”

The blonde walked away, pulling the door closed as he went. Shane watched as Nicky disappeared from sight then turned and looked at the car keys. He’d almost laughed when Nicky had said he didn’t want him to feel trapped. Trapped, Shane thought to himself. Living in someone else’s house; eating someone else’s food and, now, driving someone else’s car.  
He threw himself back down on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. It was going to be a very long day.

**--**

Nicky was only a few minutes late for work and his boss merely smiled and nodded his head. The blonde had worked for Gary for more than two years so he had a relaxed working relationship with his boss.  
It was mid-morning when Gary decided to find out what was wrong with Nicky. He’d not thought twice about the younger lad walking into work late but the blonde had been off with the pixies all morning.

During a lull in business, Gary went next door and picked up two coffees then he returned to the store and hung out the ‘closed’ sign. Nicky was at the register, staring off into space and didn’t notice.  
Gary approached the blonde and placed the coffee in front of him.

“Okay, out with it” Gary stated.  
“Huh?” Nicky replied, snapping out of his stupor.  
“Coffee, drink” Gary said. “Then, tell me what’s wrong”  
“Thanks” Nicky picked up the cup and cradled it in his hands. “But what makes you think something’s up?”  
“You’ve been in la-la land all morning so tell me what’s wrong? Did your weekend not go as planned?”  
Nicky snorted. “Yeah, something like that”

The younger boy stared down at his hands for a minute while Gary sipped his coffee. After a brief moment of contemplation, Nicky spoke.  
“Have you ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn’t’ve?” Nicky asked him.  
“What do you mean? As in, someone I couldn’t have? Or shouldn’t want?”  
“Either… Both”  
“I have… Once…”  
“If you don’t want to talk about it…”  
“No, you asked so I’ll tell… I fell in love with my college room mate. Which would have been ideal… Had he been gay too”  
“He wasn’t?”  
“No and I don’t think the thought ever crossed his mind… You know how some people question themselves at some point? Some more than others, obviously” Nicky nodded his head. “Well, he was as straight as one could be and he didn’t understand or accept my feelings for him… He made a point of bringing one girl after another back to our room… Each girl he brought to flaunt in front of me, was like a dagger in my heart”  
“What did you do?”  
“One night, I got very drunk and consumed every pill I could find…”  
“Oh God, Gary… I had no idea”  
“Luckily, one of my friends stopped by to borrow some notes from a class they’d missed and he found me…”  
“Wow…”  
“I dropped out of school after that and never went back”  
“But you own this store now… You’ve come so far”  
“I have… But, right now, I want to know what’s wrong with you… You’re not yourself today”  
“Things in my life have gotten… Complicated”

“What’s this about loving someone you shouldn’t?” Gary asked.  
“I’ve fallen in love with my best friend” Nicky confessed.  
“The cute brunette who used to come into the store and wait for you to finish your shift?” Gary enquired. Nicky nodded his head.  
“Then I don’t understand… What’s wrong with falling for someone who’s already in love with you?”  
Nicky raised his head and looked at his boss.  
“Oh come on, Nicky” Gary said. “I may be slow on some things but not this… I knew that pretty little thing was gay the first time he walked into the store… In fact, I think I knew even before he did”  
“Why didn’t you say something?”  
“It wasn’t my place… Besides, would you? And what exactly would you have wanted me to say?”  
Nicky shrugged his shoulders.  
“I’m going to ask again, what exactly is the problem?”  
“I went to visit him” Nicky began. “While I was there, his father caught us in bed together and…” he rolled his sleeve back, showing the older man his bandage “forcibly separated us”  
“Oh my god! But... Uh… By ‘in bed together’ you mean…?”  
“I mean… Totally naked and having sex”  
“Ouch”

Gary reached out and placed his hand on top of Nicky’s. The younger boy smiled his thanks at the comfort his boss offered him.  
“Anyway, he tried to kick me out but Shane wouldn’t let him… Long story short… Shane’s no longer welcome at home and he’s now living with me and my family”  
“I’m so sorry, Nicky. How’s he doing?”  
“I have no idea!” Nicky hadn’t realized that tears had started forming in his eyes. “And I… I feel like it’s all my fault! If I hadn’t gone to see him then none of this would have happened! If I hadn’t fallen in love with him…”  
“We can’t pick and choose who we do and don’t fall for… Just like we can’t force our parents to accept the decisions we make… You can’t blame yourself for the way his father reacted”  
“I went into his room; I climbed into his bed…”  
“And he let you”   
“I know but-”  
“No! No ‘buts’… The lad is head over heels for you. His father must have been blind not to see it… He’s an only child, isn’t he?” Nicky nodded. “Then of course he’s father isn’t going to understand”  
“I just… I can’t help what I’m feeling…”  
“Which is… What?”  
“That I got him into this mess; I should get him out of it”  
“And how exactly are you going to do that? Are you going to turn him straight?”  
“Maybe if I… Broke up with him, then he could go home and pretend like none of this ever happened”  
“What? You want to just send him on his way? Send him home to someone who doesn’t accept him?”  
“But if he wasn’t with me then his father never would’ve kicked him out”

“He would still be gay” Gary explained as Nicky wiped the tears from his cheek. “If you break up with him, all you would be doing is hurting him and hurting yourself. If you love him then you can’t leave him…”  
“I want to help him but I just don’t know how… I don’t know what he’s going through. My parents didn’t kick me out; I still have everything… He’s got nothing”  
“He’s got you”

Tap! Tap! Tap!  
“We’re closed” Gary shouted.  
Nicky looked up and spotted a familiar figure at the door. He jumped up and hurried through the store. The blonde unlocked the door and opened it.  
Shane stepped inside and Nicky pulled the door closed behind him. The older boy didn’t waste time with a verbal greeting. He wrapped his arms around Shane and pulled the brunette to him, capturing his lips and kissing him with a strong determination. The younger boy was taken off guard but recovered quickly and returned the embrace.

Gary was still leaning against the counter and smiled at the two lads.  
“Uh, Shane” Nicky said after they separated. “You remember my boss, Gary”

The couple made their way over to the older man. Gary held out his hand and Shane shook it in greeting.  
“Hey” Shane greeted him. “It’s been awhile”  
“It has… I heard you moved back to Sligo”  
“Yeah, I did… For awhile” the brunette felt Nicky’s hand slide into his. “I uh I guess Nicky’s told you… About us”  
“He did” Gary replied. “I’m sorry your father reacted the way he did. If you ever need anything…  
“Thanks… I uh…”  
“I’d offer you a job but I don’t have anything at the moment… Business has been a little slow lately” 

“What are you going to do for money, Shay?” Nicky asked him.  
He shrugged his shoulders.  
“That’s the most frustrating part” Shane stated.  
“What is?” Nicky replied.  
“Well…” he paused. Shane hadn’t told Nicky this information before and wasn’t sure if he should, especially in front of the blonde’s boss. “You see, I have money… I’m just not allowed to access it yet”  
“What do you mean?”  
“I have a trust fund”  
“How? I mean… I thought only rich, snotty people had those things”  
Shane laughed and squeezed Nicky’s hand.  
“It’s an inheritance from my grandfather. When he died, I was the only grandchild so instead of dividing his assets between his kids, he left it all to me… But it was put into a trust and I can’t have access until I’m twenty one”  
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?”  
“What was the point? I can’t get to the money… So, it’s like it’s not really there”

“Nicky, why don’t you take your lunch break now?” Gary suggested. “Aaron’s due to start any minute, I can watch the place until he gets here”  
“Are you sure?” Nicky asked.  
“Yeah, you two go”  
“Thanks Gary”  
“Bye” Shane said to him.

The two lads then hurried from the store. It was just like old times; they made their way down the street and ordered fish and chips. Once the food was ready, they took it to the nearby park and sat on the grass.  
For the next hour, Shane was able to forget all that had happened as he remembered all the times they had done this before. The difference now was Shane didn’t have to ‘accidently’ brush his hand against Nicky’s.

“What exactly did you say to Gary?” Shane asked while they ate.  
“Just that… Your father caught us in bed together and kicked you out and now you’re living at my house” Nicky replied.  
“He’s gay, right?”  
Nicky laughed. “Shay, you’d have to be deaf, dumb and blind not to know that”  
“I don’t know… Sometimes he seems so butch yet other times…”  
“He’s as camp as they come?”  
“Yeah”  
“I’d worked with him for a good six months before I knew. He doesn’t broadcast it but he doesn’t try to hide it either… When I mentioned you, he referred to you as ‘the cute brunette’…”  
“You’re not jealous are you?”  
“No, of course not… I know you wouldn’t leave me for him”  
“Well, you’ve never told me I’m cute”

Nicky leaned forward and kissed Shane’s cheek.  
“Did you ever think that’s because I don’t think you’re cute?” Nicky replied.  
“Oh, now you’re just going to insult me?”  
“Shay, I don’t think you’re cute because I just think of you as being perfect”  
Shane sighed and wrapped his hand around Nicky’s neck.  
“That’s just a cheap response”  
“Fine, you’re not cute because you’re too gorgeous to be ‘cute’”  
“I think you’re considered the better-looking one in this couple”  
“What does it matter anyway? I mean, sure I dress better”  
“Snob”  
“Country bumpkin”  
Nicky grabbed Shane’s arms and pinned them by his sides. The brunette giggled as he struggled to break Nicky’s hold. The older boy was laughing too but they didn’t stop Shane from leaning forward and kissing him.  
It felt good to be able to just be themselves and not have to worry about whom might see them. Nicky surrendered his hold and Shane wrapped his arms around him, kissing him as deeply as he could.

Their embrace was broken when something hit them. Nicky looked down and saw an empty Burger King take-away cup. A small group of teens, not much younger than them, were laughing and pointing.  
“Fucking fags” One shouted.  
They all laughed again before disappearing from sight. Nicky was halfway to his feet, ready to go after them, when Shane grabbed his hand and stopped him.

“Let them go, Nix” Shane said to him. “They’re gone; they had their moment of fun”  
“But-” Nicky started to argue.  
“Drop it, okay?” Nicky sighed, hating to admit defeat. “Come on, we should go… You need to get back to work”  
“This is what it’s going to be like, isn’t it?” Nicky asked.  
“What?”  
“People pointing; staring… Calling us names”  
“You called me one, remember?”  
“How could I forget…Especially when you keep reminding me”  
“Sorry”  
Nicky stood up then helped Shane to his feet. They walked back to the store in silence; Shane was quiet with concern while Nicky was still fuming over what had just happened. The couple stopped on the sidewalk and said their goodbyes.

“Thanks for coming to see me” Nicky said   
“Figured you left me the car, might as well use it” Shane replied. “Well that and I missed you”  
“You want to come get me after my shift?”  
“Like old times? Except that I have the car this time….”  
“Exactly”  
“Okay… Actually, I think I’d prefer it. There’s no way I want to be at home on my own when Danny’s girlfriend arrives”  
“I get it, safety in numbers”  
“I’ll see you in a few hours?”  
“Sure will”  
“Bye”  
“Bye”

Shane moved forward to kiss Nicky but the blonde turned and went into the shop, leaving the younger boy on the sidewalk. Shane sighed in disappointment then decided to go for a wander around the nearby shops, not that he could afford to actually buy anything.  
He pulled his jacket around himself and started off down the street.

**--**

Shane would remember the days that followed as some of the best and worst of his life. Nicky’s family were very accommodating. He never once felt like he didn’t belong there or wasn’t welcome; the first Friday night of his stay, his parents even had one of their infamous dinner parties and Shane felt accepted by all the guests. He’d met a few of them before but back then, he’d simply been one of Nicky’s friends… This time he was introduced as Nicky’s boyfriend. Some raised eyebrows or gave a questioning glance but aside from that, there was no big outcry or any prejudice.  
He knew he’d always remember that night; that Nicky’s parents hadn’t hidden their son’s relationship from their friends meant a great deal to both of them. He’d liked the way that Nicky held his hand and smiled at him during the evening.

The highs and happiness that he felt around Nicky and his family were compensated by feelings of loneliness and depression when he was alone or trying to sleep. His nightmares continued but he never confessed them to Nicky. They respected the Byrne’s request for them not to share a bed so Nicky stayed in his own room, Shane in the guestroom. The nights felt long and lonely without Nicky holding him and keeping the bad dreams away.   
While Nicky and the rest of his family were at work, Shane fell into low moments where he would simply start crying and be unable to stop. He assumed it was to be expected… His family, his father, had tuned his back on him and Shane had walked away. He was now relying on the kindness of Nicky’s family to help him through.

Danny was surprisingly supportive and helpful. He even managed to get Shane a temporary job with a friend of his. It was boring, monotonous work but the pay was fairly decent.  
The job itself wasn’t too far away from Nicky’s work so they would meet for lunch every day. Shane hoped they wouldn’t grow sick of each other… Aside from time spent at work, they spent every other waking minute together.

Nicky’s parents also had the same concern. Yvonne had spoken to Mae several times since Shane’s arrival. The first call had been hard; she could hear in Mae’s voice how much she worried about her son. They now phoned each other every couple of days but, like Nicky, Yvonne didn’t know of Shane’s nightmares or bouts of depression so Mae didn’t find out about them either.  
Once Shane started working, the moments of sadness and depression became less frequent but he did start to worry more about his future. He wasn’t making anywhere near enough money to live off. He made do but only because Yvonne and Nikki refused to take any money from him.  
Shane wanted to repay them for all they’d done for him but since they refused his money he was forced to find other ways to show his gratitude. He accompanied Yvonne when she went grocery shopping; he helped with the cooking and cleaning and single-handedly cleaned up after the Friday night dinner party.

Like his finances, his relationship with Nicky was also suffering. Despite spending practically every second together, the intimate side of their relationship had all but ceased. Sure they still held hands and enjoyed a quick kiss goodbye before heading off to work but nothing more.  
Nicky had tried, on more than one occasion, to engage Shane in something more active than just kissing but the younger boy had declined. Minutes later, Danny had come barging into the room (thinking Nicky wasn’t home) and, luckily, an embarrassing moment had been avoided.   
The older boy was starting to worry. They had been living together for nearly three weeks and Shane had been avoiding sexual intimacy with him.

It came as a surprise when Nicky’s mother pulled him aside and told him that both she and his father were going away for the weekend. A last minute business trip had come up and Nikki had invited her along. Nicky couldn’t believe his luck; his parents were going to be gone for three days and two whole nights.  
Yvonne was in the process of packing an overnight bag when she broke the news to Nicky and she didn’t miss the look of excitement on her son’s face. She stopped what she was doing and looked at him.  
Her and her husband had taken many business trips together over the years and often left Nicky and Danny to their own devices but this time she was concerned. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust them… Not entirely… But with Shane living under their roof, they felt responsible for him too.

“Where are you going this time?” Nicky asked.  
“Cork” she replied. Yvonne then turned and looked at her son. “Do we need to have a talk before I go?”  
“We don’t usually”  
“Well, we don’t usually have another guest in our house”  
“I don’t think Shane’s parents will be overly concerned about you leaving for a few days”  
“With no adult supervision, there’s no telling what you kids might get up to”  
“Mam, we’re not going to burn the house down or anything… You know us; we won’t even turn the microwave on”  
“Either way, I’m not sure about leaving Danny in charge…”  
“We’ll be fine, mam… We always are”

Yvonne looked down at the blonde and reluctantly nodded her head. Nicky quietly slipped out of the room while she resumed packing. She felt bad lying to her son but she knew she couldn’t tell him the truth, not yet anyway.

Nicky was sitting in the Living room when she came down the stairs with the luggage. She hugged him goodbye and asked him to say goodbye to Danny and Shane for her. A few minutes later he heard his father’s car pull up outside and his mother went out to meet him.  
Once he was certain the car and his parents were gone, he picked up the phone and called Danny’s mobile. He answered on the second ring.

“Nix, you know I’m not meant to answer my phone at work” Danny greeted him.  
“Yeah, I know” Nicky replied.  
“So why are you calling me?”  
“I need you to get lost tonight”  
“What?”  
“Dad’s taken mam on one of his business trips so I need the house tonight”  
“Why should you get the house?”  
“Because I called it first”  
“I’m older; I should get dibs on it… Besides, your boyfriend gets stay over every night… Caitlin doesn’t”  
“You know the house rules, girlfriends aren’t allowed to spend the night”  
“And if mam and dad are out of town, they won’t know”  
“But you’re still breaking the rule”  
“So are you”  
“No, my boyfriend lives in the house so, technically-”  
“Fuck technicalities, Nicky”  
“Danny, come on… Can you stay out or not? Please?”  
“Why should I?”  
“Because you’re my brother and you like being nice to me?”  
“Try again…”  
“Seriously… Danny”  
“Well, what’s in it for me?”

Nicky sighed in defeat. Why did his brother have to be such a pain in the ass?  
“Please, Danny? Please?” Nicky asked.  
“Look, I have to go. We’ll talk about this later” Danny replied.  
The blonde was still pleading when the line went dead. Nicky heaved another sigh and reluctantly hung up the phone. Surly he wasn’t asking too much. All he wanted was one night of privacy. Danny had plenty of friends he could stay with so why was he being so stubborn?

He didn’t want to get his hopes up but a part of him wanted to believe he could talk his brother into changing his mind. All he needed was for Danny to get home before Shane. Then his brother could be long gone when Shane finished work and the two of them could spend some real quality time together.

*

Danny arrived home about half an hour before Shane was due back. Nicky practically pounced on him the moment he walked in the door.

“Come on, Danny!” Nicky stated. “Just one night, that’s all I’m asking”  
“Well did it even occur to you that I might want Caitlin to stay over?” Danny replied.  
“No, it didn’t. Because I know the house rules and I respect them”  
“Bullshit! You just want me gone so you and Shane can do the nasty”  
“So what if I do? Why should you care what Shane & I do?”  
“I just don’t understand why you’re pushing this… You fucking live together, what’s so special about mam and dad not being home?”  
Nicky took a deep breath and averted his eyes.  
“Because Shane & I haven’t… You know? Not since he moved in” Nicky stammered.  
“It’s been three weeks” Danny replied.  
“I know”  
“And you’ve both been alone here, together… Haven’t you?”  
“Yeah, but Shane’s been… Reluctant; I’m hoping that, if he knows that no one is going to walk in and disturb us then he’ll be more eager”  
“I don’t know, Nix. I’m not sure if I like the idea of sleeping on a friend’s couch just so my baby brother can have sex”  
“Please, Danny? I’m begging you… Just for tonight”  
“No”  
“No?”  
“No, I won’t stay out all night… But I’ll make myself scarce and not be home until 3am. I swear to you, I will not walk in that door any earlier than 3am. Is that a deal?”

It wasn’t ideally what Nicky had had in mind but he knew it was the best he was going to get from his brother.  
“Okay, deal” Nicky replied.  
“And first round of drinks is on you” Danny added.  
“Fine”  
Nicky reached into his pocket, pulled out his wallet then handed some notes over to his brother. It was a small price to pay to ensure his night with Shane would go without interruptions.

“So does he even know what you’ve got planned?” Danny asked as he slipped Nicky’s money into his pocket.  
“Well I don’t have anything planned… Yet” Nicky replied. “But no, he doesn’t know mam and dad are heading out of town”  
“You should cook”  
“What?”  
“You should cook dinner… It would be a nice gesture”  
“Danny, you know I don’t know how to cook”  
“Follow a recipe book”  
“But I promised mam we wouldn’t burn the house down”  
“Oh, yeah… Better find out what his favourite take-away is and order in then”  
“I don’t want him to think I’m trying too hard”  
“Making an effort is trying too hard now is it?”  
“Hey! Look, I gave you your money now can you please leave?”  
“Fine, I’ll just nip upstairs and shower, change out of my work clothes and I’ll be gone”  
“Until 3am?”  
“Until 3am… Like I promised”  
“Thanks Danny”  
“I know I shouldn’t be saying this, since you’re my brother and all… But… Good luck. Hope it all works out for ya”  
“Thanks… And I hope so too”

Danny turned and headed up the stairs, leaving Nicky on his own. The blonde looked around and realized that he had no idea what he was doing. Cooking was out of the question and anything else that came to mind seemed tacky.  
He eyed the liquor cabinet and contemplated opening a bottle of wine. He wanted Shane to feel relaxed but wondered if that would tip the brunette off. Nicky didn’t know how to seduce Shane without the younger boy realizing he was being seduced.

Nicky hurried up the stairs and into his bedroom where he hastily changed his clothes. Dressed now in comfortable jeans and a polo shirt, he went back down to the Living room. He was barely settled on the couch when he heard the door bell. Nicky went into the hall and opened the door. Shane smiled at him as he entered the house.

“Hey” Nicky greeted him.  
“Hey” Shane replied.  
The blonde reached out and helped the younger boy out of his coat. Nicky then placed Shane’s coat in the closet and closed it. He turned and grinned at Shane before taking his hand and leading him into the Living room.

“How was your day?” Nicky asked him.  
“Boring” Shane replied. “How was yours?”  
“Better now”  
Nicky leaned forward and kissed Shane. The younger boy returned the gesture but quickly broke away.  
“What is it? What’s wrong?” Nicky asked.  
“Nothing… I mean… your parents?”  
“They’re not home”  
“They’re not? They usually are, by now… Aren’t they?”  
“Last minute business trip came up… Mam went too”  
“Does she normally?”  
“Sometimes… Depends where he’s going and for how long”  
“Where did they go?”  
“Cork”  
“For how long?”  
“Does it matter? They’re not here, now… But we are”

Nicky leaned forward again but Shane moved, climbing to his feet. He left the room and went into the Kitchen. Nicky followed him. The brunette was holding bottle of wine in his hand and searching for a glass. Nicky walked over to the cupboard and located two glasses. Shane’s hand was trembling as he poured the contents of the bottle into the glasses.

“Shay, what’s wrong?” Nicky asked him.  
“Nothing” Shane replied. “I’m fine”  
“No, you’re not”  
He took both glasses and placed them aside before taking both of Shane’s hands in his own. Then he urged the younger boy to look into his eyes.  
“Talk to me, Shay… Please?” Nicky whispered.  
“It’s just been a long day” Shane said.  
“You want to talk about it?”  
“Nope”  
Shane released Nicky’s hands and wrapped his arms around the blonde.

They were still holding each other when Danny came down the stairs. He stopped in the doorway, staring at his brother and Shane. Nicky looked up and caught his brother’s eye. Danny nodded his head then quietly slipped out of the house. He closed the front door without alerting Shane to the fact that he’d even been in the house.

“Come on” Nicky picked up the two glasses of wine then led the way back into the Living room. Shane followed and sat back down on the couch.  
Nicky handed a glass to Shane. The younger boy took it and downed its contents in one go. Nicky stared at him while sipping his own.

“Shane, did something happen at work?” Nicky asked him.  
“No, honestly, no” Shane said.  
“Then what is it?”

Nicky reached out and gently ran his hand along Shane’s arm. This action sent a nervous shiver down the brunette’s spine. He knew where this was going and wanted to stop it but he couldn’t keep saying no to the older boy.  
“I nearly called my mam today” Shane admitted.  
“What?” Nicky asked.  
“I miss her, Nix. We used to be so close… I could always talk to her, about anything”  
“You know you can talk to me”  
“Yeah, I can but… She’s my mother”   
“So call her”

Nicky reached over and picked up the phone. He turned back and handed the receiver to Shane. The brunette eyed it, cautiously, as he took it in his hand.  
“If you want to talk to her then call her” Nicky said.  
“What if she doesn’t want to speak to me?”  
“Why wouldn’t she want to?”  
“She hasn’t tried to call, not once since I left… She’s obviously mad at me for leaving”  
“Shay-”   
“What if I call and dad answers?”  
“You hang up and call another time?”

Shane looked down at the phone, his fingers trembling in anticipation. Nicky released his hand and started to stand up. Shane reached out and grabbed onto Nicky.  
“Stay? Please?” Shane whispered.  
“Okay” Nicky agreed.  
The blonde sat back down as Shane started dialling his parent’s house. He let it ring, holding Nicky’s hand tightly. There was no answer on the other end. Shane reluctantly ended the call.

“No answer” he told Nicky.  
“Maybe they’re not home from work yet?” Nicky suggested.  
“Yeah, maybe”  
“You could always try again later”  
Shane shrugged his shoulders.

“You know what, I’m just gonna go upstairs and have a shower” Shane stated.  
“Okay” Nicky replied.  
“I’ll be down in a bit”  
“You want me to order some dinner?”  
“Chinese?”  
“Whatever you want”

Shane gently kissed Nicky’s forehead then stood up. The blonde watched him walk out of the room and sighed to himself. The older boy picked up the phone and placed an order, asking for it to be delivered then returned to the kitchen for more wine.

Shane slowly made his way up the stairs and into his room. He pulled his wallet, phone and keys from his pockets and tossed them onto the bed. The brunette then made his way into the bathroom and shed his clothes. It was a welcome relief to step under the warm water.  
He closed his eyes and leaned his back against the tiled wall. Maybe he had tried to call too early but his mother was usually home at this time. He couldn’t help but feel this was a sign that he wasn’t meant to speak to her today.

Nicky was still in the Kitchen when Shane came back down the stairs. The brunette joined the older boy in having another glass of wine.  
“So, where’s Danny tonight?” Shane asked.  
“Out drinking with friends” Nicky replied.  
“Do you know when he’ll be home?”  
“Late… Really late…”  
“How do you know that?”  
“He told me… He was planning a big one. Out until they call last drinks”

“So we’ve got the whole house to ourselves then?” Shane asked him.  
“Yes, we do” Nicky replied.  
The blonde leaned in and kissed Shane. They both wrapped their arms around each other as their lips met. Nicky pulled Shane to him, holding him tightly and kissing him as deeply as he could. He could feel the younger boy surrendering to him and he smiled into the kiss.

*

They ate dinner in the living room in front of the television. Shane still couldn’t shake the disappointment he felt at not being able to reach his mother but he didn’t let it consume him. It was hard to be upset or disappointed when he was so content in Nicky’s company.  
They laughed and giggled while enjoying dinner then curled up on the floor together to watch a movie. It was during a particularly romantic scene that Nicky started to make a move on Shane.  
The blonde started slow; gently caressing Shane’s arm. This made the younger boy snuggle closer to his love. Nicky gently nuzzled his face against Shane’s neck, placing tender kisses along the skin. Shane closed his eyes and lost himself in Nicky’s embrace. It wasn’t long before the movie on the TV was forgotten and they were both in a state of undress.

“Maybe we should take this upstairs?” Nicky asked in between kisses.  
Shane didn’t speak but nodded his head.

They both climbed to their feet and made their way upstairs. The blonde opened the door to his room and ushered Shane inside. There was a nervous anticipation in the air as Nicky wrapped his arms around Shane. Their lips met as they both fell on top of the duvet.  
“I love you” Nicky whispered to him. Shane simply nodded his head.

Nicky’s hands explored Shane’s body in hopeful anticipation. He’d wanted this since the day Shane had moved in and it was finally happening. Nicky lifted Shane’s shirt and kissed his stomach.  
“What are you doing?” Shane asked him.  
“Just having some fun” Nicky replied. “Are you okay with this?”  
Shane slowly nodded.  
The blonde pulled Shane’s shirt off then reached for the waistband of his pants.  
“No, Nicky” Shane pleaded. “Stop, please?”

Nicky did as Shane asked and ceased his actions. He sat up and looked down at the brunette. The younger boy was breathing heavily and carefully sat up. He reached down and adjusted the zipper on his pants, having allowed Nicky’s hand to venture there while they were down stairs.  
“I’m sorry” Shane said.  
“Shay, its okay” Nicky replied.  
“No, it’s not. You want to have sex but I can’t”  
“Why can’t you?” The older boy moved towards Shane and wrapped his arms around him in a comforting hug while hoping the younger boy wouldn’t pull away, since Nicky wasn’t wearing a shirt. “I mean its okay… We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do but… Why? What’s wrong?”  
“I just can’t…”   
“Does this have anything to do with your parents?”  
Shane nodded his head as tears formed in his eyes.  
“I’m sorry there was no answer when you called them” Nicky said.  
“It’s not that” Shane said to him. “I still have nightmares, okay?”

“What?” Nicky asked. He pulled away and looked at Shane in shock.  
“Every night when I go to sleep, I see my father” Shane confessed, sobbing. “I close my eyes and I see the way he looked at me… At us… And it makes me feel sick inside”   
“Shane, its okay” Nicky attempted to soothe him. “It’s okay”  
“No, it’s not. I want to be with you… I know you want to have sex with me and now is the perfect time to do it but I can’t… I want to… I really do but-”  
“I told you, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to”  
“But this is what you want…”   
“It doesn’t matter what I want”  
“Yes, it does”  
“All I care about is you… and that you’re okay” Nicky sighed. “I’m so sorry”  
“You’re sorry? Sorry for what?”  
“For not seeing this… For not knowing something was wrong”  
“I tried to keep it from you”  
“Why? Why would you do that?”  
“I didn’t want you or anyone in your family to know”  
“Why not? Shay, I just want to help you”  
“Your family has been nothing but supportive… I didn’t want to be more of an inconvenience”

Nicky forced Shane to look at him.  
“You are not an inconvenience” Nicky insisted.  
“I’m living off your family, working a job that someone else got for me, driving your car and not my own” Shane replied.  
“Is this why you don’t use your key when you come home?”  
Shane nodded his head. “Using that key is like admitting that my life is here now”  
“I’m sorry, I had no idea”  
“I know you didn’t”  
“But why? Why didn’t you tell me? You shouldn’t have kept all this from me”  
“I know and I’m sorry”  
“Well, are you ready to…? Do you want to…? Talk about it now?”  
The brunette looked up into Nicky’s eyes and nodded his head. 

Shane was finally able to open up and confess everything to Nicky. What he’d been thinking and feeling and dreaming ever since the blonde had brought him here. While he talked, Nicky simply listened and held him  
The older boy stopped telling him it was okay and that everything would be alright, he just remained quiet and listened as Shane poured his heart out to him.  
He knew the move had been difficult for Shane… Leaving his home and his family but Nicky had had no idea just how much it had effected him. The blonde was disgusted at himself for not paying closer attention to Shane’s moods and behaviour.

They talked for a long time. Shane cried and the blonde held him in his arms and told him that he loved him. Eventually Shane began to calm down. It was like a massive weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he was able to hold himself up on his own again. Once everything was out in the open, Shane kissed Nicky and told him how much he loved him too.

It was nearly midnight when they left Nicky’s room and returned to the Living room. Shane set up a new DVD while Nicky cooked popcorn, without setting the Kitchen on fire. He also texted his brother and told Danny it was okay to come home.  
Sure, Nicky was disappointed that the evening hadn’t gone as he’d hoped but soon realized that it had been so much better. Shane had opened up to him and Nicky was already seeing a change in the younger boy. He secretly believed things could only get better from here on out.

 

Nicky joined Shane in the Living room with the bowl of popcorn and it was, suddenly, just like old times. Before their lives had gotten complicated; back when they were both innocent high school seniors and spent their nights watching movies instead of studying.

Shane’s hand brushed against Nicky’s and they looked at each other, smiling.  
“I’m sorry I couldn’t give you what you wanted tonight” Shane said to Nicky.  
“I’m not” Nicky replied. “You gave me so much more”  
“I did?”  
“You gave me your trust and that matters a lot to me”  
“I’ve always trusted you, Nix”

“Sleep in my room tonight”  
Shane wasn’t sure if Nicky was asking a question or telling him what to do but either way, he nodded his head. Then he smiled again.  
That night, Shane’s sleep was nightmare free. He wasn’t sure if it was the result of talking to Nicky or being able to sleep in the blonde’s arms. Either way, it was the first decent night sleep he’d had since moving in with the Byrne’s and he awoke the following morning with a twinkle in his eye and a smile upon his lips. 

**--**

Yvonne and her husband stood in nervous silence as she reached up and pressed the small button by the door. She cast Nikki an uneasy look, he reached out and took hold of her hand. A few moments passed and the door opened before them.

“Von” Mae greeted her.  
Mae stepped forward and pulled her friend into a hug. Yvonne hugged her back before they separated.  
“Nikki” Mae then turned to Nikki and hugged him too.   
“Morning Mae” Yvonne replied.  
“I see you found the place okay”  
“Yes, your directions were very clear”  
“Uh, much traffic around?”  
“Not much… We left last night and took our time”  
“Uh, please come inside”

The three of them then made their way inside the Filan’s home. Yvonne couldn’t help feeling a twinge of sadness, thinking of Shane no longer being welcome in this house.  
“Where did you stay last night?” Mae asked.  
“A little B&B just out of town” Nikki replied. “Lovely couple own the place”  
“Does… Ummm… Anyone know you’re here?”  
“By ‘anyone’, you mean the kids?” Yvonne replied. Mae nodded. “No, we told them it was a business trip to Cork”  
“You lied to them?”  
“I think if we’d told them the truth one, or both, of them would have tried to stop us”

Mae led the Byrne’s into the Kitchen and asked them to take a seat. The couple did as she said and pulled up chairs at the table. Mae turned around and put the kettle on. She glanced up at the ceiling, knowing her husband was still upstairs, and she walked over to the table. She sank into a chair beside Yvonne and grabbed her hand.

“Is he really okay?” Mae asked. “He’s taking care of himself and everything?”  
“Shane’s fine, Mae” Yvonne replied, gently petting her friend’s hand.  
“He’s been the perfect guest” Nikki replied. “Despite the circumstances”  
“Honey, shush” Yvonne scolded her husband.  
“No… It’s okay…” Mae interrupted. “This is why you’re both here… It’s what we’re all here to talk about”  
“Where’s Peter?” Nikki asked.  
“He’s still upstairs… I’m sure he’ll be down in a minute”

Mae reluctantly stood up and moved back towards the counter. She spent the next few minutes preparing tea and biscuits. When she returned to the table, she placed everything in the centre and began serving her guests.  
“Mae” Yvonne said. She stood up and placed her hand on her friend’s arm, which was shaking. “Mae, it’s okay. This doesn’t have to be awkward for any of us”  
“My son is living in your house” Mae whispered as she fought back tears.  
“Yes, he is… But it’s all going to be alright in the end”

“Do you really believe that?” Peter’s voice filtered into the room. He was standing in the doorway with his arms folded across his chest. Nikki stood up; preparing to shake his friend’s hand but Peter remained in the doorframe.  
“Of course I believe it” Nikki answered Peter’s question.  
“Listen, we all agree that this isn’t the ideal solution” Yvonne spoke up.  
“No, it’s not. Ideally, Shane should be here, with us… His family” Peter stated.  
“And he would be… If he were welcome here” Mae snapped through her tears.

“Shane is welcome to come home whenever he wants” Peter informed the Byrne’s.  
Yvonne exchanged a look with Mae while her husband eyed Peter, curiously.  
“And what’s the catch?” Nikki asked.  
“That he stops this sick, twisted little game of his”  
“Peter!” Mae cried. “You promised to be civil”  
“Things used to be so easy between the four of us” Yvonne said, trying to ease the tension in the room.  
“That was before your son led ours astray” Peter replied.  
“Excuse me?” Nikki asked.  
“Stop it, both of you” Yvonne insisted. “I think we need to agree on a few things here. Firstly, no one is to blame here”  
“That’s easy for you to say! My son was normal until he met Nicky… You didn’t see what I saw, the way your son was all over Shane, touching him and perverting him”  
“Don’t you dare call my son perverted”  
“Stop it!” Mae screamed at her husband, wanting desperately to avoid a confrontation.

“Please,” Mae continued with a calmer voice. “Lets all sit down, enjoy a cup of tea and talk… Like adults”

Both Yvonne and Nikki returned to their seats. Mae stared at her husband but he stared straight back at her. She poured cups of tea then handed around the tray of biscuits though it was clear no one would be drinking or eating anything.

“We’re agreed that we all want what’s best for our kids” Yvonne began. “Now, ideally, Shane living in our house was not what we had planned”  
“I hope you know how much it means to me, us that you’ve allowed it” Mae stated.  
“Of course we know and no thanks is necessary”   
“However” Nikki spoke up. “It’s not a long term solution. Shane has a job and is saving up money but he can’t afford college on his own. Von and I have refused to accept any money from him but he’s still struggling”

“Is this why you’re here?” Peter spoke up. “You want money from us?”  
“No! No of course not” Yvonne replied, shocked by Peter’s question. “But we do want to know if you’re still planning on sending him to college”  
“Yes, I sent them a cheque last week and I will continue to do so while he’s there” Mae replied.  
“Phew, that is a relief”  
“Why would you think that we wouldn’t pay for his college?”  
Nikki looked up at Peter. “Because he didn’t enrol where you wanted him to” he said to Peter. “But he is your son and I know that you will support him no matter what”  
“We are proposing that Shane move out of our home and into a dorm room once the semester starts”  
“Will Nicky move too?”  
“He had planned to stay at home but… This could change that”

“I just don’t understand” Peter spoke up as he moved into the room. “How can you be okay with this? Knowing that your son isn’t… Well, isn’t normal”  
“Our son is normal” Nikki replied. “And, for that matter, I’m telling you never to lay a hand on him again”  
“I would never touch-”  
“They told us what happened… How you forcibly separated them by grabbing my son and pulling him across the room”  
“I had to-”  
“You had no right! The situation is hard enough without the fact that you nearly broke my son’s wrist”

Peter’s eyes filled with tears as he spoke.  
“Your son was having sex with my son… My only son… My little boy was naked and he was… Was doing the most unimaginable things… They both were… Every time I close my eyes, I see what they were doing and it makes me sick”  
“Maybe it does… But you can’t just stop loving him. He’s still a teenager and he needs his father, his father’s love and acceptance… You saw something you shouldn’t have but that doesn’t make it wrong or evil”  
“You’re wrong, Nikki… Of course it’s wrong. Men aren’t supposed to love other men. It goes against everything I was raised to believe”  
“So what if it does? Sometime’s I feel the same way as you but Nicky is my son and I love him and I just want what’s best for him… What makes him happy… And I’ve seen him with Shane… Seen the way he looks at him and cares for him, how they’ve helped each other through so much… And I can’t fight it. I can’t stop it… And I’m not going to try to” 

“So that’s it then? You come into my house and tell me why you’re the perfect parent? That I’m the one who’s being unfair and un-accepting… You have two children. You’ll still get a wedding and grandchildren from one of them. Shane was all I had and he turned his back on us”   
“Shane would come back to you in a heartbeat. If you would just try to accept who he is”

“Don’t tell me how to handle my son!” Peter threatened.  
“Well somebody has to!” Nikki replied. “Because of your stubbornness, your son is now too scared to come home, too afraid to accept who he is and is living under my roof”  
“Then send him home, to us… Just make sure your son never comes near him ever again”  
“That’s your big solution? That Shane can come home if he severs all ties with Nicky…”   
“I’m sorry, Peter” Yvonne spoke up. “But isn’t that the same ultimatum you gave him which caused him to leave in the first place?” 

Mae was quietly weeping to herself. She didn’t have the energy to argue with her husband or weigh in with an opinion of her own. She had been afraid that this would be the outcome of the Byrne’s coming to see them.

“Von, we’re leaving” Nikki said to his wife.  
“What?” she said.  
“No” Mae sobbed.  
“I’m sorry but I can’t take much more of this” Nikki explained to the two women. “You know, I wasn’t exactly thrilled myself when I started to suspect Nicky of being gay but he is my son and I want him to be happy… And you know what else? Of all the lads he could have brought home, I’m glad it was Shane. Your son is a kind, sweet, wonderful, funny, charming lad and I couldn’t think of anyone better for my son to be with… He could have done a lot worse, since the heart wants what it wants… But I’m happy my son found someone worth fighting for”

Nikki took hold of his wife’s hand and started to move towards the door. Yvonne broke away and threw her arms around Mae. They had a quick, whispered exchange before Yvonne broke the embrace then followed her husband from the room.  
Peter stood his ground and watched them leave.

“I told you this was a bad idea” he told his wife.  
“Oh shut up” Mae snapped at her husband.  
She turned her back on him then, without another word, left the room. 

*

Yvonne was quietly holding back tears of her own. She was conflicted over how she felt. She was proud of her husband for the way he defended Nicky and even Shane but she hated that their children needed defending. She had been nervous about seeing Peter and talking to him, given what had happened between Shane and his father.  
Nikki reached out and took hold of his wife’s hand.

“I’m sorry” Nikki said to her. “I didn’t mean to lose it back there”  
She nodded her head and smiled through her tear filled eyes.  
“I really thought he would have changed his mind by now” Yvonne explained. “It’s been weeks… How can he still think those things about his own son?”  
“He did have a point-”  
“What?” she gasped.  
“Look at our kids, we know what Danny’s like but he’ll get married one day and have children… And Nicky… Well, I didn’t want to say anything but-”  
“But what?” she interrupted him.  
“Nicky may love Shane now but… Honestly? It wouldn’t surprise me if, should they break up, he settles down with a pretty girl”  
“You don’t think he’s really gay?”  
“I think he’s young and doesn’t know what he wants… Maybe he and Shane will last but maybe they won’t…”   
“Peter had such expectations from Shane”  
“Maybe if he had of allowed Shane to make some of his own choices, things would have turned out differently”

“Are we going to tell them about this?” Yvonne asked.   
“Do you think they really need to know?” Nikki replied.  
“I don’t know… Maybe we should sleep on it and decide when we get home”  
“We’re not heading home tonight?”  
“I told them we’d be gone all weekend. Besides, I think we should talk to Mae again before we leave… She’s going to call me later this afternoon”  
“What more is there to talk about?”  
“She needs reassurance… She needs to talk about this and we’re the only people she can talk to”

Nikki pulled off the road and into a small car park.  
“Why are we stopping?” Yvonne asked.  
“I thought you might want some lunch”  
“I’m not hungry and I doubt you are either”  
“No, I’m not… But we should eat something. Besides, it looks like a nice town; we should have a walk around. The circumstances that brought us here weren’t ideal but we’re here now so… Better make the most of it”

**--**

It was late morning when Shane finally stirred from his peaceful slumber. His eyes flickered and he blinked at the brightness of the room. He immediately reached for Nicky but the blonde wasn’t there. Shane sat up, searching franticly for his lover.

“I’m right here, sleepyhead” Nicky’s voice wafted over from the closet.  
“Hey” Shane greeted him. “Come back to bed”  
“It’s nearly eleven”  
“So? Come here…”

Nicky moved away from his open closet and climbed back under the duvet with the brunette. He immediately wrapped his arms around Shane and leaned in to kiss him.  
“What happened to brushing your teeth first?” Shane asked.  
“Stuff it” Nicky replied.  
The older boy’s lips found Shane’s and they both closed their eyes, losing themselves in each other’s embrace. Nicky’s hand moved up to Shane’s neck and he gently caressed the brunette’s cheek. In turn, Shane allowed his hand to travel down Nicky’s chest, past his navel and to the waistband of his boxers.

“Shay” Nicky whispered.  
“What?” Shane replied, his lips still claiming Nicky’s.  
“I uh… Please… Don’t start something you can’t finish…”  
Nicky hated saying that to Shane but he felt he had to. If the brunette’s hand ventured any further south, there would be a problem.  
“Its okay” Shane pulled away, his lips still mere centimetres from Nicky’s. “I’ll take care of you”

He closed the gap between them, slipping his tongue into Nicky’s open mouth.  
The blonde wanted to stop, convinced that Shane wasn’t ready for this yet… Not after their talk the previous night. He felt his resolve crumbling as he surrendered to Shane’s onslaught of kisses.  
It felt good; so good to be this close to Shane again.  
Nicky closed his eyes and gave himself over completely to Shane. As the brunette’s fingers touched the older boy’s skin, Nicky bit his lip, attempting to prolong the inevitable. It had been weeks since he’d been touched like that. He’d stopped touching himself once Shane moved in, feeling like there was no need for such action since Shane was so close.  
Had he not been so turned on or desperate, Nicky probably would have been embarrassed at how quickly it was all over. He’d tried to fight it but had known it was a losing battle from the start.

They lay in content silence for some time. Shane’s head resting upon Nicky’s chest while the blonde gently stroked Shane’s back.   
“How are you feeling now?” Nicky asked.  
“Like an idiot” Shane confessed. “I don’t know why I kept so much from you”  
“I understand why you did”  
Shane lifted his head and looked at Nicky.  
“Either way, I’m sorry” he said.  
“Stop apologizing” Nicky replied. He leaned down and kissed Shane’s lips. “All we ever seem to do is apologize to each other”  
“Are you saying we should be less considerate from now on?”  
“I’m saying we need to stop focusing on the past and think about the future. We can’t change what happened and blaming ourselves isn’t going to solve anything. We’ve both made mistakes and will probably make lots more in the future… But for now, we should just be happy that we’re together”  
“I am happy” Shane said.  
“So am I” Nicky replied.  
“But it’s hard to think of the future when I don’t know what’s going to happen in mine”  
“Nobody does”  
“I’ll be lucky if I last one semester in college before I have to drop out and turn tricks on the street”  
“That’s not going to happen”  
“How can you be so sure?”  
“Because I won’t let it. We’ve come this far already… We’re going to make it work, no matter what”  
“I wish I had your confidence… Maybe I would, if I had a full ride like you do”  
“What? You want me to apologise because I got a scholarship and you didn’t?”  
“You didn’t even need it; you could afford to go to college”  
“Maybe I didn’t need it but I was lucky to get one!” Nicky realized he was almost shouting and stopped. Shane hadn’t moved from his arms so the blonde tried to remain calm and not allow this conversation to escalate.

“Shane, I’m sorry” Nicky stated. “I know this isn’t easy for you”  
“I’m sorry for being jealous of your scholarship” Shane whispered.  
“Just promise me that when you start turning tricks, I get a discounted rate”  
“A discount? I should charge you more… Because I’ll know how much you’ll enjoy it. I’ll know every little thing that will turn you on so much… From how you like to be kissed to where you like to be touched… I’ll know it all”   
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”  
“That I’ll be worth every cent”   
Nicky didn’t know how to respond so he leaned down and kissed the top of Shane’s head.  
“Can we maybe not joke about this” Nicky said.  
“Well what else can we do?” Shane replied. “I’m really scared”  
“I know and I’ll take care of you”  
“But I don’t want you to… I don’t want your parents to think I’m just using you to get through college”  
“They won’t think that… They know how tough you’ve got it. But I don’t see why you’re so worked up about it, surly your parents will still try to support you?”  
Shane laughed. “You really think my dad will want anything to do with me now?”  
“Well, maybe not your dad but I’m sure your mam will help you. There’s no way she’d turn her back on you. She loves you… And your dad… Well, hopefully he’ll come around… Eventually”  
“Yeah, maybe” Shane agreed but, to Nicky, he didn’t sound hopeful.

“Come on, time to get up” Nicky said, gently pushing Shane off him and onto the mattress. “I’m hungry and need food”  
The blonde jumped out of bed and pulled on a pair of sweatpants. He turned and looked at Shane, expectantly. The younger boy stifled a yawn and reluctantly climbed off the bed. He went into the guestroom… His room…. and grabbed his robe. He pulled it on as he joined Nicky on the stairs. 

The two of them made their way into the Kitchen. Nicky headed to the cupboard to fetch the cereal and Shane went to the refrigerator for milk. Nicky poured the cereal while Shane put the kettle on. They worked quickly and quietly together before sitting down at the table with their breakfast.  
Nicky had almost finished when Danny made an appearance.

“Morning lads” Danny greeted them.  
“You seem awfully chipper… And sober” Nicky replied.  
“Well, I didn’t have to stay out all night, in the end, did I?”  
“What do you mean?” Shane asked.  
“Lover-boy there told me to make myself scarce last night so you two could do the nasty”  
“What?” Shane looked to Nicky. The blonde averted his eyes and stared down at his cup of tea.  
“So what happened?” Danny enquired. “You finished earlier than expected?”  
“Nothing happened last night” Shane replied. “Nothing you’d be interested in, anyway”

Nicky still wouldn’t look at Shane. He felt bad for what he’d done… He shouldn’t have made his brother leave but he’d wanted Shane to feel comfortable. He hadn’t wanted any interruptions and his brother was a constant interruption. Considering Nicky hadn’t gotten what he’d planned from the night, kicking his brother out had been a selfish thing to do.

“Hey I’m just… Well, enquiring minds need to know” Danny replied.  
“You do know what curiosity did to the cat, right?” Shane asked him before taking another spoonful of cereal into his mouth.  
“Of course but I’m still a nosey git”  
“Ain’t that the truth” Nicky said, speaking for the first time.

The phone began to ring so the blonde hastened from the Kitchen to answer it.  
“So, anyway” Danny said leaning against the counter. “I heard an interesting fact last night and was wondering if you could confirm it for me”  
Shane cast a look of curious interest at Danny.  
“Well, the general consensus is that gay guys give the best head, is that true?”

The younger boy almost choked on his spoon, which he’d forgotten to remove from his mouth. He coughed and spluttered as he tried to swallow the food in his mouth.  
“Whoa, are you okay?” Danny asked, concerned.  
Shane waved his hand, indicating he was alright then coughed once more. He then looked up at the older boy and held his gaze for a moment.  
“You don’t, seriously, expect me to answer that… Do you?” Shane replied, still fighting off minor coughs.  
“It’s a general interest question…”  
“Seriously… You’re asking me?”  
“You’re the only gay guy I know” Danny explained.  
Shane was still giving him an ‘are-you-completely-mental’ look. Danny frowned at the brunette, wondering what on earth his problem was.  
“Fine, be a jerk, don’t tell me” he stated.

Shane closed his eyes and rubbed the bridge of his nose, sensing an approaching headache. He then sighed and looked at Nicky’s brother once more.  
“Danny, I may be the only gay guy you know but don’t make me spell it out for you” Shane tried to be polite but worried he was going to fail miserably. He hoped Nicky would come back and save him from saying anything more but no such luck.

“I don’t get it, why won’t you just answer the damn question?” Danny snapped.  
“Because…” Shane hesitated. He sighed and admitted defeat. “Because you’re asking me about your *brother*”

The younger boy saw the look of realization on Danny’s face and looked away. He hadn’t wanted to say anything but it was obvious that the thought hadn’t even occurred to Danny. The older boy’s cheeks darkened and he shifted uncomfortably.  
Nicky walked into the room and looked from Shane to his brother and back again. He cocked his eyebrow in confusion, unsure what was going on between them.

“Is everything okay in here?” Nicky asked them.  
“Yeah, fine” Shane replied though he pushed the remainder of his breakfast aside. “Who was on the phone?”  
“David”  
“Oh?”  
“He & Siobhan are going to the movies tonight and want us to join them”  
“A double date?”  
“Yeah”  
“What did you tell them?”  
“That I had to talk to you first… And we’ll meet them at six”

Shane smiled. A night out sounded like fun. How Nicky knew that Shane would agree, he wasn’t sure but he liked that the blonde knew him that well.  
“So… What do we do until then?” Shane asked.  
“I don’t think I want to know” Danny spoke up.

“Danny, are you sure you’re okay?” Nicky asked. His brother’s face looked very flushed.  
“Yeah, I’m fine…” he started to move towards the door. “Actually, I’m meeting Caitlin for lunch so I’d better get going”   
Without saying goodbye, Danny hurried from the room. A few moments later, the two lads heard the front door close behind him.  
“What was that all about?” Nicky asked as he sat down at the table again.  
“Uh, nothing important” Shane said, grinning to himself.  
“He hasn’t been giving you a hard time or anything, has he?”  
“What? Danny? Are you kidding me?”  
“Just thought I’d ask”

Shane reached out and placed his hand over Nicky’s.  
“Danny’s like the older brother I never wanted but love regardless” Shane explained.   
“So he has been giving you a hard time?” Nicky replied.  
“He takes the mickey but I don’t mind… It makes me feel like he accepts me”  
“Why wouldn’t he accept you?”  
“I don’t know… I just… He treats me like a part of the family, not a rejected loser”  
Nicky was about to scold Shane for referring to himself as a ‘rejected loser’ but changed his mind. If he kept correcting the brunette every time he said something like that, he’d be doing nothing but all day long.  
“Of course he treats you like part of the family” Nicky said. “But we’re just biding our time… He always gave me a hard time until I started fighting back and showing him how much I could take”  
“But I don’t want to fight back… I don’t have reason to. Danny’s been nothing but nice to me since I got here. Actually, he’s been good to me since the day we first met”  
“Huh… Strange. He hates all my other friends”

Shane shrugged his shoulders.  
“Maybe he knew, even back then, that we were going to be something more?” Shane suggested.  
“Are we talking about the same person here?”  
“Nicky, you have an awesome brother… Consider yourself lucky. Wallace has two older brothers and he hates both of them”  
“Sorry to hear that”  
“Well, they’re both jerks”

“Did you ever hate being an only child?” Nicky asked him.  
“Not as much as I do now” Shane confessed. “Wallace was always jealous of the fact that I didn’t have any siblings while he had two brothers and a younger sister. Mark has two younger brothers and Kian has older and younger ones… It never really bothered me. I spent a lot of time with Mark and Kian and their cousins so I never really felt like I was missing out on anything”  
“Didn’t spending time with them make you want siblings of your own?”  
“No… Not really. Weird, I know… But I remember when dad said we were moving to Dublin, I kept thinking if our family had of been bigger it would have been too much hassle to relocate”  
“And now?”  
“Now… Now I can’t help thinking dad wouldn’t be so disappointed if he had other kids to be proud of. I know I’ve really hurt him”  
“It’s not like you did it on purpose… You didn’t intentionally set out to hurt him”  
“You really think that makes any difference? I’m not the son he wanted”  
“But you’re the only one he’s got” Nicky pulled his hand out from under Shane’s hand placed his hand on top of the brunette’s. He gently stroked the back of Shane’s palm as he smiled, reassuringly, as the younger boy. “I know he’ll come ‘round, Shay. Just… It’ll take him some time is all”   
“I just wish…” Shane trailed off.

“What?” Nicky asked him, tightening his grip on Shane’s hand. “What do you wish?”  
The younger boy looked up, into Nicky’s eyes.  
“That I wasn’t such a disappointment” Shane whispered.  
“Oh Shay…”  
Nicky moved from his seat and walked around the table. He sank to his knees beside Shane and wrapped his arms around him. The brunette leaned into Nicky’s embrace and closed his eyes. He told himself not to cry but it was hard.  
He didn’t want to feel like this. It had been weeks since his father had kicked him out and after his talk with Nicky, he’d felt like he was starting to accept his new life. He felt he should be happy to be free, no more hiding his relationship with Nicky and no more pretending to be something he wasn’t… But he couldn’t shake the feeling of rejection.

“Can we go out somewhere, Nix?” Shane asked him.  
“Sure” Nicky replied. “Where do you want to go?”  
“I don’t care… Just somewhere where I don’t have to think or feel… Somewhere fun”  
“Somewhere fun? Okay, whatever you say”  
Nicky leaned down and placed a kiss to Shane’s forehead. His lover was hurting and wanted a distraction. Nicky would do anything Shane asked of him and always would.

**--**

True to his word, Nicky did exactly as Shane asked and the couple spent the entire day having fun. By lunchtime the haunted look had finally left Shane’s face and when they were heading home, the brunette was laughing and his eyes were alight. Nicky held back a sigh of relief. Shane was in high spirits and just in time for their double date with David and Siobhan.

The night was just as fun as their day had been but with two extra people, it made it even more entertaining. The movie was terrible but they all laughed and giggled their way through it. Afterwards they went for dessert then followed it up by going for a beer.  
Shane liked spending time with David and Siobhan. He was relieved that they accepted him and Nicky as a couple. David flinched the first few times he saw the them hold hands but now he was okay. Shane didn’t really blame him, since he’d known Nicky practically all his life.

At one point, their conversation turned to old friends. Shane hadn’t spoken to any of his Sligo friends since he’d moved in with Nicky. He hadn’t even said goodbye to them when he’d left. He wasn’t even sure if they knew he was gone yet though he assumed they would have figured it out by now. Mark had called him a few times but he hadn’t been in the mood to talk to him and had sent his calls to voicemail.  
Nicky had told David & Siobhan about Samantha’s reaction when she’d found out about them and Siobhan had been shocked.   
Shane didn’t know why he’d expected Samantha to accept him anymore than his father had. In a way, he’d betrayed her too. Maybe even more-so, since he’d already started to accept his sexuality when he’d started dating her… Not that she knew (or needed to know) that.

The table suddenly went eerily quiet and Shane snapped out of his daydreaming. He’d been thinking of Mark, Kian and Wallace so he hadn’t heard what had caused everyone to fall silent.  
“You uh you still see Cormac?” Nicky asked.  
Shane saw the hurt expression on the blonde’s face and looked to David and Siobhan. They were exchanging awkward looks.  
“Well, yeah… We uh saw him on Wednesday night” David replied.  
“A bunch of us got together and hung out… Since we’re all going our separate ways in a few weeks time” Siobhan added. “I really wanted to invite you two but… Well, we knew Cormac would be there and… We didn’t want there to be any trouble”  
“Besides, Cormac isn’t the only one who… You know?”   
“No, I don’t know” Nicky stated. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Nix, calm down” Shane reached for Nicky’s hand but the older boy pulled away from him. He stared at the couple sitting opposite him. Siobhan looked away, uncomfortably, but David held Nicky’s gaze.  
“Look, I’ve come to accept what you two have but no one else has” David explained.  
“Hey!” Siobhan objected.  
“Fine… Listen, most of the girls love it but… Evan & I are the only guys”

Nicky leaned back in his seat and continued staring at his friends, dumbfounded. He couldn’t believe what David was telling him. As far as he was aware, Cormac was the only one who had caused any problems or been vocal in his objections. Then he cast his mind back and realized that, since graduation he hadn’t seen many of his friends and he’d seen only one or two of them since Shane had come to live with him.  
Now that he thought of it, the only friends he had seen were David and Evan.  
Evan had four older brothers, one of whom was gay. Nicky assumed that was the reason why Evan was so accepting of him and Shane as a couple.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Nicky asked them.  
“It’s not exactly something that’s easy to talk about” Siobhan tried to explain.  
“What did you want us to say? Congratulations Nix, all of your friends hate you?” David said.  
“But why would they hate me? I haven’t changed…”  
“Yeah, you have”   
“No, I haven’t”  
“Nicky… You have to see this from our point of view. I mean, when Cormac started running around telling the whole school you were gay, you adamantly denied it… A month later, you turn up and declare that Shane’s your boyfriend and the two of you are living together”  
“It’s not like that; Shane’s father kicked him out”  
“I just meant that… It’s like you lied to us. I don’t really get it… I mean, did you just wake up one morning and decide you were gay?”

Nicky looked at Shane. He didn’t know what to say to David. The blonde couldn’t really explain it. He’d never considered the notion of being gay… Not until he met Shane. It wasn’t even until he thought he was going to lose him that the thought even crossed his mind.  
David did have a point, he supposed. If someone had asked him, two months ago if he’d ever had any ‘gay’ inclinations, he would have honestly said no. He wasn’t even sure if he really was gay… He knew he loved Shane and was attracted to the brunette; the younger boy made him feel things he never expected to feel.  
But he was the only one. Nicky knew there was something about Shane that had caught his eye and his heart… But did falling in love with only one lad make him gay?

“No… I mean… I don’t know” Nicky replied. “Being gay never occurred to me… The thought never even crossed my mind” he admitted. “But I know that I love Shane”  
He reached under the table and took hold of Shane’s hand.  
“So… Like… When were in the showers after practice, you never looked at the other lads?”  
“No, of course not… Like I said, it never occurred to me”

“Maybe we should talk about something else?” Siobhan spoke up.  
“Why don’t you just talk amongst yourselves?” Nicky replied. He stood up and stormed off. They all watched him go but none of them tried to stop him.  
“Aren’t you going to go after him?” David asked Shane.  
“Nope, he’ll come back when he’s ready”  
“I didn’t mean to upset him”  
“I know… But it’s still a touchy subject… And this is so new, for both of us… I know you’re making the effort for Nicky’s sake but… While you’re struggling to accept him, he’s still trying to accept it himself”  
“Why are you so okay with it?”  
“Because I’ve known for a while that I was, well am… Gay…”  
“How long have you known?”  
“A few months… I never said anything though because… well, I figured it wasn’t anyone’s business but mine. And, from the way Cormac teased me on my first day at school… I knew I didn’t want anyone to find out… I was scared that I’d be teased until graduation… If I lasted that long” 

“Did you turn him?” David asked Shane.  
“What?” Shane replied.  
“Nicky… Did you turn him gay?”  
“No one has the ability to ‘turn’ someone gay… it’s not like making a vampire or anything… I think he suppressed a lot of his feelings and I encouraged him not to… But I don’t think either of us acted intentionally”  
“So Nicky would have turned gay even if he hadn’t met you?”  
“David, stop it” Siobhan cut him off. “I think that’s enough questions for tonight”

Shane caught Siobhan’s eye and smiled, gratefully, at her. She turned to David and said something to change the subject. Nicky was gone for quite some time and when he returned, he stated it was time to go. David asked him to stay while Siobhan attempted to apologize on her boyfriend’s behalf. Shane didn’t say anything; he didn’t want to get caught in the middle… But if Nicky wanted to leave then Shane would go with him.

The older boy took Shane’s hand and pulled him to his feet. They bid their friend’s goodnight before quietly leaving the bar. Shane didn’t attempt to engage Nicky in any form of conversation. The blonde didn’t say a word as they walked down the street to a taxi rank. They climbed into the taxi and Shane gave the driver Nicky’s address.  
Shane spent the entire drive watching Nicky out the corner of his eye. He was concerned that he couldn’t read the expression on the blonde’s face. He wasn’t sure just how much of an effect David’s words had had on Nicky.

The taxi came to a halt and Nicky handed over a few notes then climbed out. Shane followed and closed the door. He then hurried after Nicky as the blonde made his way up the front walk. Shane caught up to him on the porch while the older boy fumbled around for his key.  
Shane waited while Nicky unlocked the door then the two of them made their way inside. The brunette pushed the door closed behind them. He switched the hall light on before pulling off his jacket and hanging it in the closet. When he turned around, Nicky was still standing in the hall, just staring at him.

The look in Nicky’s eyes made Shane feel very uneasy. Not sure what to expect, Shane simply remained where he was, staring back at the blonde. Nicky moved towards the younger boy, stepping slowly and quietly. Once he closed the gap between them, he placed his hands on Shane’s face and leaned forward, capturing Shane’s lips with his own.

The brunette didn’t move, curiosity getting the better of him. Nicky’s touch was gentle but his kiss was fierce and intense. Shane felt the older boy was going to suck the life out of him and that he would willingly let him.   
Shane brought his hands up to caress the blonde’s neck. This action spurned Nicky on and the older boy pressed his body against Shane’s. The brunette felt Nicky’s tongue prodding him and parted his lips. He closed his eyes and decided to just go with it. If this was what Nicky needed then Shane would go along with it.

The embrace became more intense, more desperate. Nicky’s hands left Shane’s face and began to explore the rest of his body. He could feel the blonde’s excitement pressing against his thigh and slid his hand down to touch him. As soon as he did this, Nicky took a step forward, trying to move out of the hall.  
The couple met with the bottom step and both fell onto the staircase. This didn’t deter the blonde. He grabbed Shane’s shirt and started to undo the buttons. The younger boy started to protest but Nicky kissed his doubts away.

Shane was starting to worry where this was going. Nicky didn’t seem to want to stop but the brunette didn’t particularly feel like having sex on the stairs. When Nicky’s lips finally left his, Shane tried to talk sense into the blonde.

“Nix, I think that’s enough for now” Shane said to him.  
“Five more minutes” Nicky replied.  
“Come on…”   
The younger boy tried to push Nicky away but the blonde was relentless.  
“Nicky, I’m serious” Shane stated.  
The older boy gently stroked his finger down Shane’s exposed chest, sending a shiver down Shane’s spine.  
“I need to do this, Shay” Nicky whispered.  
“No, you don’t… Now stop it”

BANG!  
The sudden noise caused Nicky to snap out of his determined state and look around. Shane’s breathing had increased but slowly started to return to normal as he looked at Nicky’s face. The blonde stood up and moved in the direction the noise had come from.  
He walked towards the living room. Shane climbed to his feet and moved towards Nicky.

They both stopped just shy of the Living room and Nicky turned the lights on.  
Danny and Caitlin were on in the room, both looking embarrassed yet petrified.

“Jesus, Danny!” Nicky exclaimed. “What are you doing in here?”  
“We were just minding our own business when you two came in and started groping each other…” Danny replied. “Caitlin didn’t want to interrupt but I didn’t particularly want to witness that, okay?”  
“We weren’t doing-”  
“You were ten seconds away from it….”

“What was that noise we heard?” Shane asked, thankful for the timely interruption.  
“We were going to climb out the window and come in the front door but the window blew shut” Caitlin admitted.  
There was a brief moment of silence as none of them knew what to say next.  
“It’s been a long day,” Nicky began. “I think it’s time to call it a night”  
Without saying another word, the blonde turned away and headed up the stairs.  
“Yeah, I should probably get going” Caitlin said to Danny. Shane bid them both good night before following Nicky upstairs.

He walked down the hall to Nicky’s room and pushed the door open. Shane stepped inside then pushed the door closed. Nicky was sitting at the foot of the bed, staring at the wall.  
“I guess you’re gonna want to talk about it, huh?” Nicky asked.  
“Of course I want to talk about this” Shane said as he moved towards the older boy. “What the hell was that?”

When Nicky looked up to meet Shane’s gaze, the brunette could see the tears in Nicky’s blue eyes. He, instinctively, moved closer to the blonde, reaching out to comfort him.  
“I’m sorry” Nicky whispered.   
“Don’t be” Shane replied. He moved onto the bed behind Nicky and held him tightly in his arms.  
“I didn’t mean to… I shouldn’t have…”  
“Shhhhhh, it’s okay”

Shane leaned forward and rested his head on Nicky’s shoulder. He felt Nicky’s hands on his own and he pressed a soothing kiss to the older boy’s neck. Tears were spilling down Nicky’s cheeks but he was yet to say why. Shane didn’t want to ask, hoping Nicky would volunteer an explanation.  
It felt nice, Shane thought, being the one doing the comforting but he was starting to understand the position he put Nicky when he wouldn’t tell him what was wrong. 

“David really upset you, didn’t he?” Shane wasn’t really asking.  
“I guess” Nicky replied. “But he… He had a point, didn’t he?”  
“What do you mean?”  
The blonde extracted himself from Shane’s embrace and turned around to look at him. They sat together on the bed, staring into each other’s eyes, tears still forming in Nicky’s but no longer falling.  
“Am I really gay?” Nicky asked him.  
“I…” Shane hesitated. “I don’t think I can answer that for you, Nix”  
“I know that I liked Jessie and I was attracted to her… I’ve felt things for other girls too… But I also know what I feel for you” Nicky explained. “I know that I get excited when you touch me. I know it feels amazing when you kiss me. I know my heart pounds when I hold you in my arms”  
Shane slowly nodded his head but didn’t speak. He wasn’t sure what he was meant to say to that.  
“How can I be gay if I’ve had feelings for girls?” Nicky pondered. “But how can I be straight when I enjoy having sex with you?”

“Why are you so determined to label yourself?” Shane asked him.  
“What?”  
“Does it matter if you’re gay or straight?”  
“It matters to my friends”  
“But does it really matter to you?”  
“I… Maybe… I don’t know”

Shane reached out and took Nicky’s hand in his.  
“Do you love me, Nicky?” he asked him.  
“You know I do” the blonde replied, staring intently into his lover’s brown eyes.  
“Then what does it matter? Maybe I’m the only lad you’re ever going to be with, maybe I’m not… But, for now, who cares? We’re together now and that’s all that matters… Right?”

Nicky blinked back the remaining tears and nodded his head.  
He knew Shane was right. Why was he questioning himself when he knew that what he felt for Shane was all that was important right now? He loved Shane. He loved being with him, holding and kissing him.  
Maybe his friend’s didn’t approve but if that were the case, then those people obviously weren’t his true friends. He’d meant what he said earlier, he hadn’t changed. He was still the same person he was when he’d gone to school with them all. All that was different was that the person by his side was a lad, not a girl.  
If his friends couldn’t see past that then it was their loss, not his… But knowing he was losing some of his friends still hurt him.

Nicky nodded his head again. He raised his other hand and placed it on Shane’s cheek, gently caressing his face. The brunette leaned into the touch and smiled, reassuringly at Nicky. The blonde leaned forward and kissed Shane’s lips in a firm yet loving kiss. 

“I’m sorry for over-reacting” Nicky said to him.  
“At least it wasn’t me this time” Shane replied. “All the times you’ve comforted me these past few weeks; it’s nice to be able to return the favour”  
“I’ll try not to make a habit of it”  
“Me too”  
“And I am sorry about what happened downstairs… I didn’t mean to get carried away. I should have stopped when you asked me to”  
“It’s okay”  
“No, it’s not… You should be able to trust me. I should have listened to you rather than trying to prove something to myself”  
“What, exactly, were you trying to prove?”  
Nicky averted his eyes for a brief moment then returned to meet Shane’s. He stroked the younger boy’s cheek once more before brushing his thumb across Shane’s lips.  
“I was making sure” Nicky explained.  
“Making sure of what?” Shane asked.  
“That being with you turns me on”  
Shane moved closer to the blonde, leaning towards him to whisper in his ear.  
“And… Does it?” he breathed.

Nicky closed his eyes and nodded his head as a violent shiver passed down his spine. He licked his lips and his eyes flickered open. Shane moved again, this time placing his leg over Nicky so he was straddling the blonde. He wrapped his arms around the older boy; his shirt was still open from Nicky’s earlier attempt and the blonde could feel the heat emanating from Shane’s body.  
He reached up and gently pushed Shane’s shirt from his shoulders. The brunette allowed his shirt to drop to the floor. In turn, he gripped the bottom of Nicky’s shirt and pulled it off over his head. It joined Shane’s at the foot of the bed.  
Nicky wrapped his arms around Shane and pulled the brunette’s body to his. With the material barrier gone, Shane’s chest touched Nicky’s naked skin and they both remained still. The younger boy could feel Nicky’s heart beating in his chest. He was sure the blonde could hear his in return.

“Are you feeling turned on yet?” Shane whispered in Nicky’s ear.  
The blonde couldn’t respond. He simply nodded his head. Shane smiled and captured Nicky’s lips with his own. He slowly began to thrust his hips, moving against Nicky and hearing a low moan from his lover.  
“How about now?” Shane asked.  
The intended result was almost instantaneous. He could feel Nicky’s hardness pressing against his jeans. Shane moved again, this time he straightened up, making himself taller than the blonde and gazing down at him. He lifted Nicky’s chin so the older boy was looking up at him then he leaned down and plunged his tongue into Nicky’s waiting mouth.

Not wanting to lose contact, Nicky thrust his hips up to meet Shane. He felt the brunette smile into the kiss and he stopped then pulled away. A feat he was very surprised he managed to achieve.  
He stared up at Shane while the younger boy looked down at him.

“You’re killing me here” Nicky groaned.  
“Just trying to be helpful” Shane replied. “Do you want to keep going?”

Nicky reached up and wrapped his arms around Shane. He then rolled over, pulling the brunette down onto the mattress. The younger boy was taken by surprise so Nicky used it to his advantage and gained the upper hand. He pinned Shane to the bed, pressing his body atop of Shane’s and thrusting his hips against the younger boy’s hardness.  
Now that he was in control, Nicky ran his hand down Shane’s chest to the waistband of his pants and slowly started pulling them down. Their eyes remained locked as Shane allowed the blonde to undress him.   
Within seconds the younger boy was completely naked before Nicky. Shane thought the knowledge would embarrass him but it proved to be the opposite. He was reminded of when he and Nicky had made love in front of the fireplace at his home in Sligo. For a few moments, Nicky had been naked while Shane, himself, was partially dressed. The blonde had had an expression on his face that Shane hadn’t quite understood but he got it now.

Shane reached out and pulled Nicky to him. The blonde climbed on top of him and quickly resumed their kissing. Shane’s weeping hardness was trapped between their bodies, which only resulted in him feeling even more turned on.  
This wasn’t exactly what he’d had in mind when he’d started this. His goal had been to work Nicky into a wild frenzy but, somehow, the tables had turned. He slid his hands down Nicky’s body and into his jeans. The blonde groaned as Shane’s fingers touched his hardened flesh.

“Take off your pants” Shane whispered in Nicky’s ear.

It was all the encouragement he needed. Nicky undid his belt and zip then wriggled out of his jeans and underwear. Shane sat up to meet him half way and their lips met. Shane reached down and took both his and Nicky’s cocks in his hand. As their kisses became fierce and intense, Shane increased the speed of his strokes. The feeling of their hardness’s rubbing together along with Shane’s skilled fingers meant it didn’t take long for them both to come.

The couple collapsed in an exhausted heap, both panting for breath. Nicky looked over at Shane and grinned at him. The brunette returned the smile before wrapping his arms around Nicky and holding him tightly.  
“How do you feel now?” Shane asked him.  
“I’m sorry for the way I acted” Nicky replied. “And for the things I said… gay, straight… Whatever! As long as I have you… (And we can keep doing stuff like that)… That’s all that matters to me”  
“I always knew you were only after me for my body”  
“Hey, I liked you long before I knew how good you are in bed”  
“I still think we need more practice” Shane said, grinning.

Nicky grinned back and leaned forward for another kiss.  
“Well, in that case… Ready for round two?” Nicky asked him.  
“Just… Let me catch my breath first…” Shane replied.  
“I love you, Shane” Nicky said. “I’m sorry I let what David said to me question it… I never meant to doubt my feelings for you”  
“You didn’t”  
“By questioning if I’m gay, that’s throws doubt on my feelings for you and it was wrong of me to do that. I may not be gay but I know what I feel for you. I know that I love you and that you turn me on more than I’ve ever been turned on before… You’re the only lad I want to be with”  
“Same here, Nix”

**--**

Yvonne and Nikki were in their room at the bed and breakfast they were staying at when there was a knock at the door. Yvonne stood up and walked over to it. She opened the door and found Mae in the hallway. Yvonne threw her arms around her friend and hugged her tightly.

“Mae” she greeted her. “I’m so glad you’re here”  
“Me too” Mae replied.

Yvonne released her then ushered her inside the room. Nikki climbed to his feet and hugged Mae in greeting.  
“Peter doesn’t know I’m here, obviously” Mae told them. “He thinks I’ve gone out to buy milk… So I can’t stay long”  
“Have a seat?” Nikki indicated a vacant seat.  
Mae smiled and sat down at the table. Nikki sat down opposite her while his wife sat down on the bed.

“I’m sorry we left the way we did” Nikki apologized.  
“Its okay” she replied. “This whole situation is getting out of hand”  
“We all just want what’s best for the kids” Yvonne added.  
“They’re not kids anymore, sweetheart” Nikki said to her.  
“They’re our kids” Mae replied. “They always will be”

“Anyway” Mae continued. “I can never thank you enough for all that you’ve done for Shane. Taking him in and putting a roof over his head. I’m eternally grateful to you both”  
“It’s been…” Yvonne paused. “I want to say a pleasure but it doesn’t seem right. Shane’s an amazing young lad and he means the world to Nicky. He’s polite, responsible and considerate and… He’s like a part of the family now”  
“It’s just a shame… the circumstances of which brought him to our house” Nikki added.

“Like I said… Peter doesn’t know I’m here” Mae said. “And he doesn’t know what I’m about to ask of you either”  
Nikki looked at his wife. She met his eye and they exchanged a look before both turning their attention back to Mae. She reached into her bag and pulled out an envelope.  
“Mae, we can’t accept anything from you” Yvonne said.  
“Oh… No” she said. “I’m afraid it’s much more than that”

Mae took a deep breath then looked at Yvonne. She stared at her for a moment then turned her attention to Nikki. After a brief second, she looked down at the envelope in her hands.

“I’m going to ask a lot of you and you’re free to say no, of course, but I hope you don’t” Mae began. “A few years ago, my father passed away. In his Will, he asked that everything he own be sold and all his money be put into a Trust fund… You see, I’m one of three kids. I have two older siblings. A brother and a sister… For some reason, one we’ll probably never know, my father wanted all his inheritance in a Trust fund for his grandchildren… But, you see, my sister can’t have children and our brother, he never wanted any. Shane is, and probably always will be, the only grandchild… And my father knew that at the time he wrote his Will”  
“So… You’re telling us that Shane has an inheritance?”  
“Yes. It was placed into a trust and he would be granted access when he turns twenty one”  
“Why are you telling us this?”  
“Because I’m the Trustee of Shane’s Trust… Which means that I can amend the stipulations should I chose to”  
She opened the envelope and pulled out a formal looking document.  
“And I’ve chosen to”

“Mae, what exactly are you saying?” Yvonne asked her.  
“I had a friend, a lawyer, work out all the details” she explained. “This document, once signed by Shane, will allow him access to his Trust. He won’t have to wait until he’s twenty one. He can have it now”  
“Are you sure you want to do that?”  
“Yes… And no”  
“Mae-”  
“Shane knows about this Trust… And I want him to have financial security. You said yourselves that he’s barely making ends meet. With this money, he’ll be able to see himself through college. I did manage to pay some tuition for him but Peter may not let me in the future. You also said that Shane is responsible. I believe he will do the right thing with this money”  
“May we ask how much there is? Not an exact amount but…” Nikki hesitated. “Are we talking college tuition and a little left on the side or-?”  
“It’s a fair amount… The college tuition probably would eat up about half of it but there would still be a decent amount left over” 

“Again… why are you telling us all this?” Yvonne asked Mae.  
“Because I want to give this document to you” Mae explained. “All you need to do is give it to Shane and have him sign it and the money will be his”  
“You said you were going to be asking a lot of us, that doesn’t seem like too much to ask… If the money is technically Shane’s anyway”  
“Well, here’s the catch… I want you to give this to Shane when you feel he’s ready for it”

“What?” Nikki asked.  
“You can’t be serious?” Yvonne said. “We can’t make that decision”   
“Shane has to go to college. Please? Just, keep an eye on him and if he looks like he needs the help, then give him the document. I wouldn’t ask this of you if I didn’t think it was necessary”  
“But why? Why is it necessary?”  
“I know my son. But I’m worried that if I give him this money, he’ll do something stupid with it… Maybe you could talk to him, find out if he really needs it now and if you think he can handle it then give it to him”  
“Mae, this shouldn’t be up to us”

“Please?” Mae begged. “Peter doesn’t know about this… I mean, he knows about the Trust but he doesn’t know the changes I’ve made. This money belonged to my father and I know he’d want Shane to have it, especially now that he needs it”  
“We can give this to him…” Nikki said. “But it shouldn’t be up to us when”  
“Then think of Nicky”  
“Nicky?”  
“What if Shane does do something stupid? With that much money he could head straight to Vegas and take Nicky with him”  
“He wouldn’t do that”  
“Money can change people” Yvonne spoke up. “And if Shane did take off with that much money, you know Nicky would go too”

“Please?” Mae said. “Just think about it, for me?”  
Nikki picked up the document and looked it over before slipping it back in the envelope.  
“We’ll think about it” Nikki said to her. “When we get home, we’ll put it in the safe. Before Shane moves out and into the dorm, we’ll sit him down and we’ll talk it over with him. How does that sound?”  
“Thank you!”

Mae hugged Nikki then Yvonne just as her phone started to ring. She pulled it from her bag and noticed the caller ID.  
“Hi Peter” she greeted the caller. “Yeah, I’ll be home soon… Bumped into an old friend and got talking… Yes… See you soon”  
She ended the call and put the phone back in her bag.

“I really need to go” Mae said. “Thank you… So much… For everything”  
Mae hugged them both again and within seconds, she was gone.

Yvonne picked up the envelope and held it in her hands. She looked up at her husband and he stared back at her.  
“Are we doing the right thing here?” she asked him.  
“Mae wants what’s best for Shane” Nikki replied. “We all do”  
“Do you think we should give him the money?”  
“I think that after everything he’s been though, he deserves a break”  
“A break? You mean an all expenses paid trip to-”  
“I mean, he deserves to go to college and not stress about how he’s going to pay for it”  
“I guess you’re right about that”  
“So why don’t you sound so sure?”  
“Because I’m scared that Mae has a point… With that much money, what’s to stop Shane from running away and taking Nicky with him?”  
“Nicky wouldn’t give up his scholarship…”  
“Are you sure about that?”  
“Of course, all he’s ever wanted was to play soccer”  
“Shane gave up everything to be with Nicky… You don’t think Nicky would do the same for him?”

**--**

Shane stifled a yawn and stretched, reaching for the blonde beside him. Nicky’s bed was empty. The brunette opened his eyes and looked at the vacant spot beside him. He’d not heard the older boy get up.   
“Nicky?” Shane called. “Nix?”

He started to climb out of bed then realized he was naked and stopped. Shane pulled the duvet up and lay back down, wondering where Nicky had disappeared to. A few minutes later, the bedroom door opened and the blonde entered the room. He was carrying two cups of tea.

“Oh, you’re awake” Nicky greeted him.  
“I am” Shane replied. He sat up as Nicky climbed onto the bed and handed him a cup.  
Shane kissed the blonde good morning.  
“What’s this?” he asked.  
“Tea”  
“What’s the occasion?”  
“Does there need to be one?”  
“This is your way of saying its okay?” Shane asked him.  
“Something like that” Nicky replied.

Shane smiled once more then began to sip the warm contents of the cup. Nicky propped up his pillow and leaned back against it. He was glad his parents had gone away for the weekend. It was nice to be able to wake up beside Shane in the morning.  
“You realise we’ll be at college before you know it” Nicky stated.  
“Yeah…” Shane replied. “So?”  
“I’m just saying…”  
“Saying what?”  
“That we’ll be in dorm rooms and won’t have to worry about my parents anymore”  
“No, we’ll just have room-mates to contend with”  
“I’m sure it won’t be that bad…” he didn’t sound convinced.

“It’s too bad we couldn’t afford a place together” Shane stated. “Then we wouldn’t have to worry about anybody else… Just each other”  
“Sounds nice” Nicky agreed.  
“Wait a minute, did you say “we’ll” be in dorms?”  
“I did”  
“You… You’re moving onto the campus too?”  
“I am” Nicky smiled. “I haven’t told mam and dad yet but they knew it was always a possibility”  
“Maybe we’ll be lucky and end up as room mates anyway?”  
“I wouldn’t count on it” Nicky laughed. “But we might manage the same building… If not the same floor”  
“Even that sounds too hopeful”  
“I know” 

Shane reached over and took hold of Nicky’s hand.  
“I was starting to enjoy this” Shane told him.  
“Enjoy what?” Nicky asked.  
“Waking up in your bed”  
Nicky leaned down and kissed the brunette.   
“Once we’re on our own, we’ll be able to do it more often” Nicky assured him.  
“I wish I could believe that” Shane trailed off, deep in thought.  
“What? What are you thinking about?”  
“We should have had sex last night”  
“Shane-”  
“No, I know… I didn’t want… I wasn’t ready but looking back… We should have. Who knows how long it will be before we get the chance again?”  
“Hey, what we did (last night) was still pretty amazing… And maybe having sex would have been a good way to end the evening but it wasn’t necessary. Two days ago you said you weren’t up for it and I wasn’t going to pressure you into something you weren’t ready for”  
“It’s not like we haven’t already done it”  
“I know, Shay… But it’s different now. Before… there was always that small sense of being caught. What we had was a secret and we did it whenever the opportunity presented itself but now… Now we don’t have to hide anymore. We can do whatever we want-”  
“Whenever your parents aren’t around” Shane finished.  
“Once we’re at college, we can go at it like rabbits but for now, we’ll just pace ourselves. Think about how much better it will be when we’re finally alone and can take our time and just enjoy being together”  
“That does sound pretty damned fantastic” Shane agreed. “But what are we supposed to do until then? I know it’s only two weeks away but…”  
“Two weeks isn’t that long”  
“It is when we live in the same house and our beds are only one room apart”  
“You’ve been celibate for nearly a month… I’m sure you can last another two weeks”  
“If you say so”

Knock! Knock!

“Oi! Nix, Shane!” Danny’s voice bellowed from the hallway. “I know you’re both in there”  
“What?” Nicky called out. “What do you want?”  
“I’m leaving for work… Got called on for an extra shift… I’ll be home after lunch. Mam called, said her and dad are on their way home already. Should be here in a few hours”

Both Nicky and Shane turned and looked at each other as Danny’s footsteps disappeared down the hall. The brunette smiled and placed his cup of tea on the bedside table. He then reached out and took Nicky’s from him, placing the cup beside his own.

“What are you doing?” Nicky asked Shane.  
The younger boy had a slight twinkle in his eye as he sat up. He moved towards Nicky, sliding his leg over the blonde’s body and wrapping his arms around his neck.  
“Haven’t you ever heard the saying ‘don’t look a gift horse in the mouth’?” Shane replied.  
“I have but-”

Nicky’s words were cut short by a deep kiss from the brunette. Without missing a beat, he slid his arms around Shane’s waist while returning the kiss with equal intensity. After several moments, the younger boy pulled away.  
“Danny’s gone to work, you’re parents won’t be home for a few hours” Shane explained to him.  
“Yeah, I… I heard” Nicky replied.  
“This is our missed opportunity, Nix!”  
“Shay-”  
“I want you to… Make love to me, right here and now, in your bed… Like we did in mine”

Nicky reached up and brushed his hand across Shane’s cheek. The younger boy was staring at him with such love and determination that he knew he wouldn’t be able to say no to him.

*

The two lads collapsed in an exhausted heap on Nicky’s bed. Both, panting for breath and bathed in a post-sex glow. It had been too long since they’d last done it and neither of them remembered it being so good. Shane mustered up what little strength he had left to lean forward and kiss his lover’s lips.  
Nicky smiled and pulled Shane into his arms. They lay on their backs, staring up at the ceiling with matching grins on their faces.

“That was amazing,” Shane panted.  
“You’re telling me” Nicky agreed.  
Nicky turned his head. Shane did the same so they were now gazing into each other’s eyes.  
“I’m sorry I held back for so long” Shane said. “We should have done that weeks ago”  
“It might not have felt so good” Nicky reasoned. “I think it was so damned fantastic because we waited so long in between shags”  
“I promise I won’t make you wait a month for the next one”  
“Hey, I’m hoping to get it up again in the next ten minutes for another round”  
Shane giggled and Nicky smiled at him. It warmed his heart, seeing Shane smiling and hearing his laughter again. 

“I think I’m going to need a shower first” Shane stated.  
“Sounds like a plan” Nicky replied. “Mind if I join you?”  
“Wasn’t going to go without you”

*

For the second time that morning, the two lads collapsed on Nicky’s bed. They’d just shared a rather intense session in the shower and were still reeling from the effects. Shane had had no idea how amazing shower sex was and he was glad he’d found out. It was also a relief knowing that Nicky had put all his misgivings about his sexuality aside.  
From the way the blonde had worked him in the shower, Shane knew without a shadow of a doubt that Nicky was attracted to him. He thought of the way Nicky had moaned when he touched him; how Nicky’s body had reacted to contact with Shane’s.

“Have we got time for a round 3?” Shane asked, still panting slightly.  
“Already?” Nicky replied. “Listen, I’m glad you’re so into this right now but if you expect to be ridden all day, we may need to invest in some… Accessories”  
“Accessories?”  
“Sex toys, Shay”  
The brunette’s face paled somewhat after hearing those words. Nicky saw the expression on Shane’s face and rolled onto his stomach, staring intently into Shane’s eyes.  
“Hey, it’s okay… I’m not talking about anything too fancy. Just a vibrator or a dildo or something”  
“What’s a dildo?”

It was Nicky’s turn to laugh. He loved the innocence in Shane’s voice.  
“Well… It’s usually made of rubber and is shaped like a cock” Nicky explained.  
“Are you saying you’re sick of me already and want me to start using ‘toys’ instead?”  
“No, of course not. I just meant for times when you’ve worn me out but you want to keep going”  
“I can’t imagine it would be much fun”  
Nicky smiled and shrugged his shoulders. “Well, maybe we’ll find out one day”  
“Yeah, maybe… But for now, you’re more than enough for me”  
“I’m sorry to say it but I don’t think I’m going to be able to get it up again”

“Well… Uh…” Shane hesitated. “What if we… Uh…”   
“What?” Nicky whispered.  
“When my dad caught us… You and I, we were… I mean, I was… Uh… If uh you want to… I mean…”  
“Shay, I’m sorry but I didn’t catch a single word of that”  
“What if I made love to you?”  
Nicky looked up and gazed at Shane from beneath his lashes. He didn’t know what to say so he remained quiet, simply looking at the brunette. Nicky licked his lips in nervous anticipation. Shane reached out and gently stroked the older boys back. Nicky wasn’t sure Shane even knew he was doing it but his actions were having the desired effect on the blonde… Not that Shane could actually see that.  
“You don’t want to…” Shane said.

“No, I… I didn’t say that” Nicky assured him. “I just… Are you sure that’s what you want?”  
“Why wouldn’t I?”  
“Well…. Given what happened last time and your reluctance to have sex after that…”  
“I’m sure it was just as embarrassing for you as it was for me”  
“Uh… Yeah” Nicky agreed. “It was, technically, my first time”  
“Well… Do you want to… Try again?”  
Nicky covered the distance between them and kissed Shane’s lips.  
“Ready when you are” Nicky said to him.  
Shane smiled as Nicky propped himself up on his elbows then climbed on top of the brunette. Their lips came together once more while Shane wrapped his arms around Nicky.

“And you’re sure you’re okay with this?” Shane asked him. “This is what you want?”  
“Yes” Nicky whispered in response. “I want to feel you inside me”  
That was all Shane needed to hear. He gave Nicky one last, gentle kiss then pulled away. He reached for the lube on the bedside table and picked up the box of condoms too.   
Nicky moved further up the bed, propping himself up with his pillow and looking down at Shane. The younger boy had only done this once before and they’d been interrupted before they could finish. It was understandable that they both feel a little nervous.

The brunette coated his finger while Nicky parted his legs. Shane positioned himself in the right spot and slowly inserted his finger into Nicky’s crevice. The older boy winced but didn’t make a sound. Shane whispered, soothingly, to him. Nicky smiled and bit his lip.  
“It’s okay” Nicky said before Shane could ask. He could see the uncertainty on his lover’s face and wanted to assure him that everything was alright.  
“You’ll tell me if it’s not?” Shane asked.  
“Of course”  
Shane nodded his head then breached the blonde with a second finger. He could see the lingering effect he was having on Nicky’s body but resisted the temptation. There would be time for that later. His own cock was beginning to weep in anticipation.  
He took his time, not wanting to rush and risk hurting Nicky. Shane worked a third finger into the older boy and smiled when Nicky moaned his name.

The blonde managed to tear open the packaging and retrieve a condom which he handed to Shane. The younger boy took the condom and thanked Nicky with a kiss. He slid the rubber over his hardness then prepared himself for the next step.  
As Shane moved ever closer to his goal, he didn’t realise he was holding his breath. It wasn’t until he felt the blonde’s hand on his cheek that he slowly exhaled.

“You’re supposed to be telling me to relax, not the other way ‘round” Nicky said to him.  
“Yeah, I know” Shane replied. “I’m just a little nervous…”  
Nicky half smiled and half laughed at the brunette. “I know, I’m nervous too but we’ve gone further before”

Shane nodded his head in agreement then kissed Nicky. While their lips touched, the brunette slowly pushed the head of his cock into the older boy. Nicky groaned into Shane’s mouth, tightening his grip on the younger boy’s shoulder and digging his fingers into the skin.  
Their kiss was broken when Shane pulled away and gently stroked Nicky’s cheek. It took a few moments for the blonde to relax and adjust to the unusual feeling. The sensations that overwhelmed him were the same he’d felt last time and he moaned.

“It feels… Feels good” Nicky panted. “Weird but good”  
“That’s what you said last time” Shane replied.  
“You remember?”  
“I remember every touch, every kiss, every whispered word, and every hitch of your breath”  
“That’s kind of creepy, Shay”  
“It was a moment I never wanted to forget… And, thanks to my dad, it was ruined”  
“At least you’ll never forget it”

Nicky’s attempt at a joke spurred Shane on. The younger boy thrust his hips, sliding further into Nicky’s ass. The blonde groaned and clenched his fists. Shane increased his pace as he thrust in and out of the older boy. Nicky’s breathing hitched up a notch as the head of Shane’s cock brushed his prostate.

“Ohhhhh” Nicky moaned. “Do that again!”  
“Do what?”  
“That… Where you just were…”  
Shane thrust again and Nicky bit his lip. His own cock was rock hard and he reached down to touch himself. As his hand closed over his hardness, Shane’s hand closed over his. They began to work Nicky’s tool together.  
“That feels so good” Nicky whispered. Having Shane inside him and touching him at the same time was proving too much for the blonde.

“I love you” Shane whispered in his lover’s ear.  
Nicky reached up and ran his fingers through Shane’s wet hair.  
“Marry me” Nicky replied.

As the blonde spoke those words, Shane came, his seed filling up the condom. The look of pure ecstasy on the brunette’s face was enough to send Nicky over the edge. The older boy came hard, shooting his load all over his and Shane’s hands.   
They both collapsed in a spent heap, panting and sweating.

“I… Uh… What did you just say?” Shane asked Nicky.  
“I… I asked you to marry me” Nicky replied.  
“I thought that’s what you said”

Shane pulled out of Nicky and removed the used condom. It joined the rest in the garbage bin and Shane picked up their damp cloth. He used it to wipe Nicky’s come from his hand and Nicky’s body. Then he handed it to the blonde and Nicky cleaned himself up.

“You’re not going to say anything?” Nicky asked.  
“I… Uh… Don’t know what to say” Shane admitted.  
“Shay, that was incredible. It felt amazing and I… Thank you”  
“Nix-”  
“But I meant it… Marry me?”  
“Nicky…”  
“I know it’s crazy, right? And I’m sorry for having my doubts but… I know now that you’re the only one I want to be with. You’re the only person I will ever let do that to me. I trust you and love you with all my heart and I want us to be together, for the rest of our lives…”  
Shane was still struggling to catch his breath and he stared at Nicky in absolute disbelief. Yes, that had been one incredible sexual experience but the last thing he’d expected (from it) was a marriage proposal. 

“I’m serious, Shane…” Nicky stated.  
“Is it even legal for us to do that?” Shane asked.  
“Well, maybe not ‘married-married’ but we can have a civil partnership… We can go to the Town Hall or wherever it’s done and enter into a civil partnership, it’s just like being married”  
“Nix… I… I don’t know what to say”  
“Say yes!”

Shane sat up and looked down at Nicky. The older boy was staring at him with so much love and adoration that he was finding it difficult to say no. He managed to hold his resolve and took a deep breath.

“Nicky, I love you-” Shane began.  
“But?” Nicky cut him off. “There’s a ‘but’ coming, isn’t there?”  
“Nix, we’re barely eighteen… We can’t get ‘married’. We haven’t even started college yet, we’re barely out of school”  
“So?”  
“It’s so, so sweet of you to ask but-”  
“Don’t you want to? Don’t you love me?”  
“I do… I love you so much and… I would love nothing more than to…”  
Shane trailed off. He reached out and took both of Nicky’s hands in his. He gazed into his lovers eyes then leaned forward and kissed him with as much love, tenderness and devotion as he could.

“Okay” Shane agreed.  
“Really?” Nicky exclaimed.   
The brunette sure had changed his mind fast but Nicky didn’t care.  
“On one condition” Shane continued.  
“Condition?” Nicky asked.  
“I will marry you, Nix but not right now”

Shane tightened his hold on Nicky’s hands. He had the blonde’s undivided attention but he wanted to be careful in how he explained his position to Nicky.  
“I think we need to wait” Shane added.  
“Wait?”  
“Like I said, we’re barely eighteen. We’ve got the rest of our lives ahead of us”  
“It’s a civil partnership, Shay… Not a death sentence”  
“I know that… I just think we should focus on college first and then, when we’re twenty one and I inherit my Trust fund, we’ll fly to Vegas and get married… Have a proper vacation and ceremony and everything”  
“I don’t want you spending your money on me… On that…”  
“But I want to… It’s only a couple of years… Just till I get my money. I don’t want you to get caught up in all my troubles between now and then. College isn’t going to be cheap or easy for me and, if we get ‘married’ you’re going to feel obliged to help me”  
“Shay, I’ll want to help you because I love you”  
“Please, Nix? We can call it an engagement, for now. Then, in three years, once we’re both twenty one, we’ll go to Vegas”  
“I don’t want to wait three years, Shay”  
“Why not? If we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives then what’s three years?”  
“What if you don’t get your money? What if your dad stops it?”  
“He can’t… He has no control over it… My mam’s the one in charge and she won’t keep it from me”

Shane reached up and cupped Nicky’s cheek.  
“I love you” Shane insisted. “And I will ‘marry’ you one day… just not right now”  
“Think about how great it would be if we went to college and were already ‘married’? Having the safety net of knowing we’re always going to be there for each other”  
“We’ll be there for each other anyway… Besides, we won’t be living together. We can’t afford it. I don’t want to spend my first year of ‘marriage’ not living with my partner”  
Nicky moved forward and kissed Shane’s lips.  
He knew the brunette was right. They were both very young and had the rest of their lives to do crazy things like getting married… But Nicky had meant every word he’d said. It may have just slipped out of his mouth while making love but he didn’t regret asking. Shane had, technically, said yes so they were now engaged.

Nicky laughed to himself.  
“What?” Shane asked.  
“Was just thinking what your dad would say if he knew we’d just gotten engaged” Nicky stated.  
“Oh God. I don’t even want to think about it…”

“Shay?” Nicky began. “I know we’ve done nothing but all morning…”  
“You want to go again?” Shane finished for him.  
Nicky nodded his head.   
“I just got engaged… I think a celebratory fuck is in order” Nicky said.  
“I think so too” Shane replied.

Shane leaned in for another kiss, capturing Nicky’s lips with his. He knew Nicky’s parents would be home soon and he didn’t want to waste another second. They had lots to celebrate now and even less time to do it in.

They, somehow, managed to pull it off though. They enjoyed yet another round of intense sexual pleasure; Shane believed they must have set some kind of record for their efforts. The two of them even found time to shower and remove all evidence of the past twelve hours.

When Nikki and Yvonne arrived home, they found their son and his boyfriend on the couch, watching a movie. The two lads didn’t hear them enter the house. Yvonne stood, unnoticed, in the doorway, staring at Shane and thinking of the promised she’d made Mae.  
How was she ever going to decide when it was a good time to lose her youngest son?

**--**

Yvonne hated lying to her children but she knew it wasn’t the right time to come clean. Danny would, most likely, understand but she wasn’t sure how Nicky would feel. She knew it had been wrong to not tell them the truth about where they were going and why but she couldn’t take that back now.

Later that night, after dinner, Yvonne was sitting on the couch in the Living room watching her two children and their loved ones around the karaoke machine.  
Her husband was in the Kitchen, making coffee, and when he returned, he was smiling at her. She accepted the warm mug and returned his smile. There was sadness in her eyes and Nikki reached for her hand.

“How are we supposed to make this kind of decision?” Yvonne asked him.  
“Mae trusts us to do the right thing” Nikki replied.  
“Exactly, how do we know what the right thing to do is?”  
“We don’t… But we can cross that bridge when we get to it. Shane’s not expecting this money for years. He won’t even know he’s missing out on it… If we don’t say anything, that is”  
“I know… But he really needs the money”

Yvonne glanced back at the four people crowded around the old machine. Shane was holding a microphone, as was Caitlin and they were belting out a very heartfelt duet. She smiled; the young lad, who’d managed to steal her son’s heart, had an amazing voice. She wondered if he’d ever considered singing professionally then pushed the thought aside. If he became a world famous singer, it would be another way for him to take Nicky away from her.

“Mr. Byrne?” Caitlin spoke up. “Would you like a turn?”  
“No, thank you” he laughed. “I think my karaoke days are long over”  
She nodded her head then passed her microphone to Nicky.  
“Come on, you two, it’s your turn”

 

Nicky took the microphone from her while she scrolled through the list of songs. A moment later, she selected a track and smiled. Caitlin sat down on the floor, Danny slid his arms around her and the two of them looked to the other couple. She placed her hands over Danny’s and smiled up at him.

The music started and Nicky laughed at her song choice, a twinkle in his eye. The blonde reached for Shane’s hand then indicated for him to start singing.  
By the end of the song, Yvonne was wiping tears from her eyes. She was subtle about it so only her husband noticed. When the song finished, Nicky stole a kiss, not caring that his parents were in the room.

Nikk was the first to call it a night. Danny and Caitlin left not long after Nikki retired as Danny had to drive her home. This left Nicky and Shane alone with Nicky’s mother. She took one of the microphones and selected a song, turning the volume down as to not disturb her husband’s sleep.  
While his mother sang, Nicky held onto Shane. The brunette leaned into him and they listened to Yvonne. Shane had always thought Nicky’s singing ability was inherited from his father; it looked like Nicky had gotten it from both of his parents.  
Shane closed his eyes, remembering the times his mother had sung him to sleep when he was younger. Hearing Nicky mother singing made him miss his own mother. He kept his eyes closed so Nicky wouldn’t see his unshed tears.

The song came to an end and Nicky moved to switch the machine off. No words were said amongst the three people in the room. Shane kept his head down so Nicky wouldn’t see the sadness he was feeling.  
Yvonne kissed her son on the cheek and bid him goodnight. Without thinking, she pulled Shane into a hug and said the same to him. He hugged her in return and wished her goodnight before following Nicky upstairs.

The two lads stopped in the hallway between their rooms. The past two nights Shane had gone to bed with Nicky but now the blonde’s parents were back. He could see the disappointment on the older boy’s face at the prospect of going to sleep in separate beds. Nicky wrapped his arms around Shane and kissed him. The brunette returned Nicky’s kiss with equal passion, reluctant to let him go.

Yvonne came up the stairs while they were saying goodnight to each other and she stopped, watching the two of them in silence. They were so invested in their embrace that neither of them noticed her there.

“Oh go on” she whispered.  
The two of them sprang apart, startled by her voice.  
“Mam, you scared us” Nicky said.  
“I know” she smiled. “Now go on, you two”  
“Mam?”  
Yvonne walked past her son and pushed open the door to Shane’s room.  
“Not a word to your father” she said to them. “Off to bed, both of you” 

Not needing to be told again, Shane went into his room. Nicky stopped and hugged his mother.  
“Thank you” he whispered in her ear.  
“I wasn’t born yesterday, you know” she replied. “If you think I don’t know you spent the last two nights sharing a bed…”  
“So why are you letting us tonight?”  
She shrugged her shoulders. “Call it a moment of weakness, I guess”  
“Thanks mam”  
“Like I said, don’t tell your father… He’s got an early start tomorrow anyway”

Nicky pulled away from his mother then hurried into Shane’s room. He pushed the door closed and turned around. The brunette was already sitting on the bed.  
“Your mother’s trusting us to behave” Shane said to Nicky.  
“We can be quiet” Nicky replied.  
“No, we can’t” Shane smiled. “Just… Come here”

The blonde approached Shane and the younger boy climbed to his feet. He slowly separated Nicky from his clothes, shedding his own as he went. Once they were both down to their underwear, Nicky took Shane’s hand and pulled him onto the bed.  
“Just falling asleep with you in my arms is enough for now” Shane assured him.  
“Do you think my parents would let us do this every night if they knew we were engaged?” Nicky asked.  
“I think if your parents knew we were engaged, they’d be showing me the door”  
“Shane-”  
“I’m serious, Nix. It’s one thing to say we’re dating but an engagement? That’s a whole new ballpark”  
“You don’t think they’ll approve”  
“I just think we should keep it between us… At least until we get to college”  
“I guess you’re right… If we tell my mam, she’ll tell yours and your dad will-”   
“Will what?” Shane asked. “Kick me out? Disown me? Threaten you? Oh wait, he’s done all that already”  
“No, you’re right… It’s better this way. To keep it just between us”

Shane pulled back the duvet while Nicky turned off the light. They then settled down under the warm blankets. Nicky reached for Shane and pulled the brunette into his arms. The younger boy placed his hand over Nicky’s and the blonde threaded their fingers together.  
They lay together in the dark, both wondering what the future would bring but neither of them worried. As long as they were together and had each other, they would get through it. No matter how hard or long the road ahead was, they were travelling it together and nothing was going to come between them.


End file.
